Your relationship has always been seriously out of balance. You’ve always been giving more emotionally. Even in your break-up, you are holding most of the feelings. Please move on. As heartbroken as you feel right now, it is better that this relationship ended so that you can find someone who is more emotionally available and more honest. Believe me. There are many, many women out there who are longing to meet a guy like you.
I wish you well.