Okay the short of the issue is that I was spending alot of time with this man. One day he blew up at me because he found out I was talking a friend of his. (His friend and I were friends before he and I were friends.) He told me from day one that we were just friends, but then his behavior of shutting me out showed that he was saying one thing but meant another. I had already bought a ticket to go see him and so I went. I totally had no idea that I was going to see him. I ran into him and he was nice at the beginning of the night. When I asked him what the deal was he told me to stop calling. He said, “It’s been a month and a half and you haven’t taken a hint.” I said, “I’ve cried everyday for 5 weeks and it sucks.” He said, “yeah I know.” I’ve done some semi ridiculous things to get him to talk to me and none of it has worked. I waited almost a month and called and he responded, “didn’t I tell u to stop calling? Didn’t I? and I said yes and he hung up in my face.
So now I am hurting. The honest truth is I want him back in my life. I want him to forgive me and us move forward. I don’t understand my emotions. I’ve cried everyday since September 16 and I am not happy. I miss him and just long to be his friend.
This man has told you as clearly as a person can that he doesn’t want any kind of relationship with you. Yet you simply won’t accept his rejection. Three months of emotional pain is way out of proportion to the situation. It’s as if the pain about him is the only way you have a kind of relationship with him so you won’t let it go. I wonder if this incident has triggered some old, unresolved hurt inside of you. If you could figure yourself out, you would have done so by now.
I hope you will seek out a counselor to help you quiet these intense feelings. Once you get some relief, you’ll be able to think straight again. It’s important. I can’t imagine that you’d ever want to go through this again.
I wish you well. Dr. Marie
She can’t accept his rejection.
Dr. Marie Hartwell-Walker
Dr. Marie is licensed as both a psychologist and marriage and family counselor. She specializes in couples and family therapy and parent education. Follow her on Facebook or Twitter.
APA Reference Hartwell-Walker, D. (2018). She can’t accept his rejection.. Psych Central.
Retrieved on May 21, 2019, from https://psychcentral.com/ask-the-therapist/2007/12/13/she-cant-accept-his-rejection/
Last updated: 8 May 2018 Last reviewed: By a member of our scientific advisory board on 8 May 2018 Published on Psych Central.com. All rights reserved.