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What should I do about my husband’s money issues and lying?

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Q: My husband and I have only been married for ten months, and things are not going well. I knew before we got married that he did not have good role models growing up and that he had some money issues. He told me that when it comes down to him not having enough money, he will do anything to get it. At first he would slip my credit or debit card out of my purse without telling me and when I would confront him, he would say that he needed gas or something and thought it would be ok. I just found out recently that he has applied for credit cards in my name and been using them also. This upsets me very much. How can he do such a hurtful thing to his own wife? This is illegal! When I confronted him, he says he wasn’t thinking clearly and he needed the card for emergencies. Now I am worried that we will keep getting credit cards in the mail that he has applied for and I will not find them. What should I do?

What should I do about my husband’s money issues and lying?

Answered by on -

A.

You have a serious problem that you need to take some serious measures to resolve. First, I suggest finding a good attorney to see if there are things you can do to protect yourself legally and financially. Second, I would give your husband an ultimatum that he must get psychological help for this issue or you will leave him. Third, I would suggest he meet with a financial planner so he can learn how to live within his means as well as understanding the consequences of going into debt and how to improve (or ruin) a credit score. I know you are early into this marriage but I would think twice about staying in it. Not only could he ruin you financially but he has lied to you on numerous occasions. How can you have a healthy long-term relationship with someone who is not only dishonest but will hurt you for his own gain? I wish you luck with this unfortunate situation.

What should I do about my husband’s money issues and lying?

Holly Counts, Psy.D.

Dr. Holly Counts is a licensed Clinical Psychologist. She utilizes a mind, body and spirit approach to healing. Dr. Counts received her Bachelor’s degree in Psychology from Wright State University and her Masters and Doctoral degrees in Clinical Psychology from Nova Southeastern University. Dr. Counts has worked in a variety of settings and has specialized in trauma and abuse, relationship issues, health psychology, women’s issues, adolescence, GLBT, life transitions and grief counseling. She has specialty training in guided imagery, EMDR, EFT, hypnosis and using intuition to heal. Her current passion involves integrating holistic and alternative approaches to health and healing with psychology.

APA Reference
Counts, H. (2018). What should I do about my husband’s money issues and lying?. Psych Central. Retrieved on March 25, 2019, from https://psychcentral.com/ask-the-therapist/2007/04/01/what-should-i-do-about-my-husbands-money-issues-and-lying/
Scientifically Reviewed
Last updated: 8 May 2018
Last reviewed: By a member of our scientific advisory board on 8 May 2018
Published on Psych Central.com. All rights reserved.