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We need help and can’t afford it!

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My girlfriend was recently diagnosed with bipolar disorder by a doctor who should have retired about a hundred years ago. I myself have bipolar and I really don’t think she has it, but I don’t know. I know you can’t diagnose a person without meeting them, but she’s just really impulsive and quick to anger and I can’t even talk to her anymore. It’s ruining our relationship and breaking my heart. I had to move back to my parents house because I couldn’t take her behaviors anymore. I have stood behind her through EVERYTHING, but she’s just getting worse. She’s verbally and physically abusive, she tried to strangle me and beat my head against a wall. She says she knows what she’s doing, and she knows it’s wrong, and wants to stop, but she can’t control herself. What could this be? She gets depressed too but I think that a trigger from her mother, and she self mutilates but I think that’s more of an attention thing. I self mutilate too (and have BPD) but hers are superficial, mine require stitches. I just don’t want to lose her, she is the love of my life and I want to help her, and SHE wants help, but she has no insurance and we’re out of options. Please help me.
Thank you for your time.

We need help and can’t afford it!

Answered by on -


You are both struggling with your own issues at the same time that you are trying to love and help each other. If you want to stay together, you do need some help. You and your partner could pool your money and get some couple’s counseling. You are not out of options. I found your local mental health center on the internet. They have a sliding scale for people who are uninsured and can’t pay the full rate. Contact CPC’s Access Center at 732-842-2000 ext. 4221 to schedule an appointment or obtain information on programs and services. Also – many private therapists keep some low-income slots available or set their fees on a sliding fee scale. It is worth making some phone calls. Your doctors may have some suggestions for who to contact.
I wish you well.
Dr. Marie

We need help and can’t afford it!

Dr. Marie Hartwell-Walker

Dr. Marie is licensed as both a psychologist and marriage and family counselor. She specializes in couples and family therapy and parent education. Follow her on Facebook or Twitter.

APA Reference
Hartwell-Walker, D. (2018). We need help and can’t afford it!. Psych Central. Retrieved on March 26, 2019, from
Scientifically Reviewed
Last updated: 8 May 2018
Last reviewed: By a member of our scientific advisory board on 8 May 2018
Published on Psych All rights reserved.