Q. I have been in and out of suicidal thoughts and actions for a few years now. I have tried therapy but feel the Doctor’s I’ve dealt with give up on me too easy. I try my hardest to move on , I don’t like being in this state. I find myself now in that place again and in a familiar rut I keep falling into. I am sick and tired of being in this state but doctor’s just give up on me, maybe they’re more patient with women. I have noticed in group therapy they get extra treatment. I cut back on my medication from 3 to 2 pills because I am gaining too much weight and losing my hair. It’s called Epival. There was a great change in me while taking the 3 , so much so people commented on how better I look. The weight was one of the issues that help keep me depressed. Soon and as I feel it doesn’t matter , someone points out how much weight I have gained. This is only a minor issue I suppose in reality to most and to me too because there are other issues as well. This past weekend I took an overdose to test how much I could take, obviously I didn’t take enough so now I know to take more, this weekend ,maybe. I say maybe because I never know what’s going to come up that’ll make me feel life isn’t worth it. I am a ticking time bomb. Please , if you can give me any direction to what to do to get over these everlasting feelings I’d really appreciate your input. As I see it there really is no reason to be alive anyway. I hurt so much emotionally and physically. I wasnt the pain to stop. I have seen almost every psychiatrist in this city , really , and I feel they just ignore me and pump me with medication instead of trying to listen and understand me so they can help me down the right path.How do I get the help I need?
How do I get the help I need?
What I hearing from you is that you are really putting forth the effort to improve your psychological status and the medications that you are trying do not seem to be working. I commend you on your hard work thus far. One avenue that it does not seem you have explored, at least based on your letter, is talk therapy. Working with a good therapist can help you deal with your suicidal thoughts and depression. Psychiatrists usually do not provide talk therapy and their focus generally is on medication only. Medications alone are not sufficient enough to help you through your situation. Medications will likely never be enough to help you through your situation and this is true for most everybody in any situation involving any type of psychiatric symptoms or psychiatric disorder. My advice to you is to seek out help from mental health professionals whose focus is not on medication. Find a therapist to work through your issues with. I am not saying to stop seeing your psychiatrist; continue to see your psychiatrist but in addition to the psychiatrist see a therapist. I do not believe that you get well with medication only. You’ve seen every psychiatrist in the city and now it is time to start visiting therapists in your city. Keep searching until the find the one you like the best and who makes you feel the most comfortable. It is this person who would likely help you the most. I hope this helps. Please take care and write again if you have any more questions.