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Erection problems

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Q: I was dating this girl for 2 years and never once had a problem getting an erection, nor did I before her. After her, I have had sex with at least 6 different girls, and only a few of them I had no problem getting erect. I thought it fixed itself until just the other night when my fantasy finally came true with the one that I have had dreams about, and I had a problem
getting/maintaining an erection. I don’t know if it’s all in my head or what, but it’s pretty embarrassing.

A: Erectile problems are very common but not often talked about. The ability to have and maintain an erection is linked both to medical and psychological issues. In this most recent case it was probably just performance anxiety because of being with the “girl of your dreams.” If the problem persists I would first talk you your doctor. Many men find this too embarrassing to discuss but you need to. There are several medical conditions such as diabetes and MS that affect erectile function. If everything checks out ok, you may consider a few counseling sessions to work on anxiety or self-confidence issues. However, having occasional problems is very normal and nothing to worry too much about . Hope this helps.

Erection problems

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Erection problems

Holly Counts, Psy.D.

Dr. Holly Counts is a licensed Clinical Psychologist. She utilizes a mind, body and spirit approach to healing. Dr. Counts received her Bachelor’s degree in Psychology from Wright State University and her Masters and Doctoral degrees in Clinical Psychology from Nova Southeastern University. Dr. Counts has worked in a variety of settings and has specialized in trauma and abuse, relationship issues, health psychology, women’s issues, adolescence, GLBT, life transitions and grief counseling. She has specialty training in guided imagery, EMDR, EFT, hypnosis and using intuition to heal. Her current passion involves integrating holistic and alternative approaches to health and healing with psychology.

APA Reference
Counts, H. (2018). Erection problems. Psych Central. Retrieved on March 24, 2019, from
Scientifically Reviewed
Last updated: 8 May 2018
Last reviewed: By a member of our scientific advisory board on 8 May 2018
Published on Psych All rights reserved.