Q: I will be graduating in May with a degree in Chemical
Engineering and I do not know what I want to do, where I want to live, how close I want to be to my family and if I want to stay with my boyfriend of 3 years who is still very much in love with me. Everyone in my life has been very supportive and encourages me to do what ever I want. But I have absolutely on idea what I want to do. I love my family and I am close with everyone, and I would be sad to live far away from them. At the same time I want to explore, I want to see what else is out there, I have only lived in two small towns in New Mexico, but at the same time I love NM and small communities and no traffic. My boyfriend lives in a town in NM that is surrounded by all the stuff I love about NM, and I could get a good job working on a topic that is of interest. But that option does not allow me to explore, it keeps me in everything familiar, and I am terrified of commitment, and I keep telling my self that I am not ready to settle down with him, as he is my first love and only my second relationship. I think I am ready for a big change, but I am so scared that leaving what I know and love would devastate me, I am a shy person and tend escape social situations.
A: I would suggest following your gut instincts in this situation and spread your wings. There is no better time than after college to move away, try an internship, visit other places, try new things, etc. Most colleges have placement offices that can help you search for a job on a national level. You won’t have this added help once you are out on your own for a while. It’s hard to move away and it’s hard to break out of the comfort zone, but I believe that it is always good for us. Even if we fall flat on our face, we learn from that experience. I also believe that no decision we ever make about our lives has to be 100% permanent (except suicide). So try some new things and see what happens. You can always change your mind and you can always go back home. But how will you know what is best if you never try? Good luck.