Q. I have a sister that is in her thirties and I think she has a mental disorder. She is a paranoyed person. Things that to me is stupid she worries about. For example we were doing remodilng in our home and we were working on the bathroom and we took the bathroom door off and she came to my house and had to use the bathroom. It was just her and I there and she had to use the bathroom. She went through and shut all of my bedroom doors and checked to make sure that no one was in the house because she was afraid that someone would see her in the bathroom. She is also a depressed person and real hard to get along with. She has a daughter,her name begans with the same letter as mine and when we are all together she gets our name mixed up she calls her daughter by my name and just keeps doing it. My mom babied her and always has. All of my brothers and my one sister know she has a problem but we are not sure what it is. She drives all of us crazy,its hard to be around her. She is always asking my brother if he is mad at her because she thinks that he isn’t talking to her enough. She always wants pitty. She is a single mother and doesn’t work and expects her family to keep her. She has trouble taking orders at jobs because she gets mad. She got into trouble one time when she was in her twienties for hitting a co worker with a six pack of pop in the face. My brother told me when he was a little boy she used to bite the blood out of him and he would tell my mom and my sister would denie it every time and my mom would beleive her. My mom just doesnt relize she has a problem and I think she does. She told me that she went to the doctor last week and they told her that they thought she had bipolar. She doesn’t belive it. Im tired of my mom making excuses for her and defending her when she is wrong.

A. I cannot give you a diagnosis for her but I can say that in life there are things you can change and things you cannot. You have attempted to change your mother and sister. At this time, realize that your efforts are not achieving much success. At some point you should begin to disconnect yourself from those people whom you cannot help, so as to minimize the negative impact they have on your life. Begin to unplug emotionally and interactively. You can’t let someone who is in denial degrade the quality of your life.