Sexuality Library


F E A T U R E D    A R T I C L E

April is National Child Abuse Prevention Month

April 28th, 2014
I’d like to think that some April I won’t have to write about Child Abuse Prevention Month. But here we are again. Kids are still being abused in America. The statistics are shocking: In the United States, over five children are ...

April is Sexual Assault Awareness Month: Parents, It’s Time to Have ‘The Talk’

Talk Therapy Touted as First-Line Treatment for Youth with Psychosis RiskAttention, parents of tweens and teens: If you haven’t had “the talk,” it’s time. Kids need information about sex -- both its joys and its dangers -- from people they love and trust. However uncomfortable it may ...

Picking up the Pieces After the Betrayal of Cheating

Picking up the Pieces After the Betrayal of CheatingIt must be cellular: Men and women automatically feel humiliated when their partner cheats, even though they themselves have done nothing to be ashamed of. Too often, people feel embarrassed for their partner's behavior, whether it's domestic violence, ...

Gay, Straight & the Reason Why: The Science of Sexual Orientation

BOOK REVIEW.
A bit over twenty years ago I was in college in California and two of my roommates were gay men. One of them mentioned a research paper had been published by a scientist at the Salk Institute. The scientist had autopsied a bunch of people and confirmed that men, on average, have a larger bunch ...

How to Think More About Sex

BOOK REVIEW.
Titles like “How to Think More About Sex” have to be targets for wisecracks. Written by Alain de Botton, this, however, is intended to be a serious book about a very serious subject. The emphasis is on how strange and troublesome many of us find this intensely pleasurable experience. All of us secretly fear that we ...

Surviving Child Sexual Abuse

What is child sexual abuse? Child sexual abuse is any sexual behavior directed toward a child by a person who has power over that child. Such behavior always involves a betrayal of the child’s trust. Some forms of sexual abuse involve physical contact. These include masturbation, intercourse, fondling, oral sex, and anal or vaginal penetration with objects. ...

The Oxford Handbook of Sexual Conflict in Humans

BOOK REVIEW.
Is the battle of the sexes between men and women real or a social convention? It turns out that men and women compete not only for gender equality in the workplace, but also via the very structure of their bodies and the chemical composition of their bodily fluids. The 21 essays in The Oxford Handbook ...

How to Heal from Infidelity

Consider this surprising statistic: At least one or both parties in 50 percent of all couples, married and living together, straight and gay, will break their vows of sexual or emotional exclusivity during the lifetime of the relationship. ~ Shirley Glass, Not Just ...

When Fantasy Crosses the Line

When Fantasy Crosses the LineFantasizing about another person may seem like a harmless indulgence, but it actually draws us closer to temptation and can increase the risk of being unfaithful. In the same way that dwelling on worries and possible catastrophes ...

Talk to Me First: Everything You Need to Know to Become Your Kids’ “Go To Person” About Sex

BOOK REVIEW.
Sex has become so prevalent in America in recent years that not only is it casually accepted, it is commonplace. With just a few clicks, any child can access an unending world of pornography on his or her computer; children “sext” with one another; commercials for "male enhancement" pills are shown between segments on ESPN's SportsCenter -- sex ...

The Top 5 Housemate Complaints

The Top 5 Housemate ComplaintsIt seemed like a good idea at the time. Four friends who have known each other since freshman year decide to share an apartment or house or to all take rooms in a local rooming house. They already ...

Red Flags of Love Fraud: 10 Signs You’re Dating a Sociopath

BOOK REVIEW.
Donna Andersen started LoveFraud.com after her former husband drained her of $227,000, cheated on her, fathered a child outside their marriage, and remarried 10 days after their divorce was finalized. The website, which was created to warn others about the dangers of love frauders, was the impetus for Andersen’s book, Red Flags of Love Fraud. The ...

What is Emotional Abandonment?

What is Emotional Abandonment?Many people don’t realize that they’re feeling emotionally abandoned or that they did as a child. They may be unhappy, but can’t put their finger on what it is. People tend to think of abandonment as something physical, ...

How to Spot Emotional Unavailability

How to Spot Emotional UnavailabilityIf you’ve ever been in a relationship with someone emotionally unavailable, you know the pain of not being able to get close to the one you love. They’re evasive, make excuses, or are just inept when it ...

From the Living Room to the Bedroom

BOOK REVIEW.
In From the Living Room to the Bedroom, Bill and Ginger Bercaw aren’t afraid to get personal about the details and the intricacies of a relationship.  They are serious about intimacy and they don’t hesitate to say things that might make some readers blush.  Their goal in writing this e-book is to help couples establish ...

Daughters Need Fathers, Too

Daughters Need Fathers, TooFathers, be good to your daughters Daughters will love like you do ~ "Daughters," by John Mayer We hear a lot about the importance of male role models in a boy’s life. It is indeed important. But what’s often missing from the ...

Sexuality and Marital Intimacy

Sexuality and Marital Intimacy A good marriage is best friends with passion. Without the passion, you just have a friendship. For some, being companions is sufficient. But for most, it is not. One of the major casualties of the harried pace of ...

Two Plus Two: Couples and Their Couple Friendships

BOOK REVIEW.
What if I told you that one secret to making a long-term relationship more fulfilling is to have another committed couple with whom you and your beloved could spend time?  The very premise of Two Plus Two is that it is important for couples to have couple friends.  Drs. Greif and Deal (a duo whose ...

Sexual Awareness: Your Guide to Healthy Couple Sexuality

BOOK REVIEW.
Now in its fifth edition since its original publication in 1975, Barry and Emily McCarthy’s Sexual Awareness is still the go-to book for couples who want to learn more about healthy sexuality. Each of the 19 chapters deals with one specific area. Examples include “Self-Exploration and Masturbation,” “Your Sexual Voice” and “Couple Sexual Desire.” Written ...

How to Overcome Obstacles to Positive Change

We all are faced at times with trying to persuade others to make behavioral changes, or needing to do so ourselves. These efforts can leave us feeling frustrated and helpless; our good intentions seem to be in vain. Why is it ...

How Can I Improve Intimacy in My Marriage?

How Can I Improve Intimacy in My Marriage?It has become too common a refrain: There isn't enough time. This is the excuse put forth by so many couples that I speak to in workshops and in my office. Wives and husbands are pleading that ...

7 Reasons to Seek Marriage Counseling

7 Reasons to Seek Marriage CounselingMarriage rates supposedly are on the decline. While it's an oft-repeated statistic that 50 percent of first marriages end in divorce, that number has remained unchanged for the past 30 years. Divorce rates also vary with the partners' level of ...

Who Is a Sex Addict?

Who Is a Sex Addict?Increasing numbers of men and women are seeking clinical treatment for sexual addiction. This is partly the result of the increasingly endless variety of Internet-based sexual content, and partly the result of easy accessibility of anonymous sexual partnering ...