Are You an Enabler? Enabling is a term often used in the context of a relationship with an addict. It might be a drug ...
The Oxford Handbook of Prevention in Counseling Psychology As the old saying goes, an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure. Unfortunately, when we practice prevention there’s rarely any kind of instant “return on investment” to reinforce our behavior. The results ...
Therapists Spill: My Definition of Success In the fall, clinician Joyce Marter and her husband hosted their friends for a dinner party at their Chicago home. Among the ...
The Oxford Handbook of Personality and Social Psychology What’s the difference between personality psychology and social psychology? In essence, personality psychology focuses on the person, while social psychology focuses on the situation—how people act in different situations, or how situations affect individuals. In ...
Where to Start and What to Ask: An Assessment Handbook Two decades ago, in January 1993, Susan Lukas released Where to Start and What to Ask: An Assessment Handbook, aimed at guiding mental health practitioners toward better psychological assessments and intake interviews.
Though the author ...
Lost at Sea: The Jon Ronson Mysteries “I’m a midwife to the dying – for those who want to hasten their death,” says George Exoo, a Unitarian preacher who claims to have assisted 102 people in killing themselves. He often carries a ...
Power Plays Between Brothers & Families This story shows how the troubled relationship between two brothers was a therapeutic opportunity to change maladaptive family patterns.
Drew, 19, and Steve, 20, were close brothers raised in a volatile family. When Drew started getting into trouble in college, their mom arranged for the brothers to live together in an apartment, hoping that Steve could watch out for Drew. This solution backfired; the boys acted out family-related power plays. Physical confrontation escalated along with family-related conflict and hostility. At this point, the mom sought help.
Mom and Dad’s Perspective
Kate was an immigrant from Italy who, more than anything, wanted a better life for her children. She worked tirelessly to earn money for their education.
Consistent with the old-school style of authoritarian parenting with which she was raised, Kate demanded devotion and obedience. She was very involved with her sons and, though caring, she was also high-strung, anxious and unrelenting when they didn’t perform - yelling, threatening and lecturing – reminding them of her very real sacrifice and suffering on their behalf.
Drew perpetually disappointed and upset Kate. He failed to live up to her expectations and often lied to appease her. She worried about his ability to be independent, responsible, and protect himself. Steve, on the other hand, was seen as the ideal son: high-achieving, responsible, and aggressive. She constantly compared the two of them.
Good Therapy for OCD With the help of the Internet, my son Dan correctly diagnosed himself with obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) at the age of 17. After his ...
The Self Under Siege: A Therapeutic Model for Differentiation “How much of our identity or self is truly representative of our own wants and goals in life, and how much does it reflect the wants and priorities of someone else?” This is the question ...
Re-Gifting or Re-Giving? General wisdom these days declares that passing along a gift is tacky. Reasonable people get unreasonably offended when they even suspect that the puce ...
The Secret Life of Pronouns Suicidal poets use “I” more. Presidential candidates who say “we” come across as arrogant and aloof toward their audience. In the week ...
OCD, Guilt and Religion "For as he thinketh in his heart, so is he…."
~ Proverbs 23:7
Grace had grown up in a religious home. She ...
Introverts and the Quest for Quiet I’ve always been regarded as quiet. I revive myself through quiet time, reading, listening to music, or journaling. I have never ...
