Enter Dr. Jane Baxter and her book, Manage Your Depression Through Exercise.  It is a five-week plan to assist depression sufferers in starting an exercise routine and battling through their depression.  She is a cheerleader and friend through the book, motivating and encouraging the reader in their journey.  With her career in psychotherapy and as a personal trainer, Dr. Baxter tackles depression head-on in her book, incorporating the physical, mental and spiritual aspects of living a healthy lifestyle. 

So how is her book any different from other exercise books?  Many exercise books and programs can make beginners feel like they are being thrown into the deep end of a pool to learn to swim.  Dr. Baxter takes a slower approach; she holds your hand and guides you into the pool using the steps in the shallow end.  Do not misconstrue this as coddling or babying.  In her first chapter, she clearly states, “excuses are not welcome.”  She explains that everyone must take responsibility for his or her own life and actions.  Enough blaming and finger pointing; she lays it out and tells readers that if they want a change, it is up to them. 

The program begins light in the first week; workouts are only five to 15 minutes a day.  She even provides pictures of the exercises.  Each week the exercises progress in intensity.  Dr. Baxter also includes other forms of exercise other than the ones that she specifically refers to in her book. 

What exercise book would be complete without nutrition advice?  Rather than go to an extreme, Dr. Baxter advises to “find a diet and exercise plan that works for you.”  She encourages readers to “eat like a pig.” What she means is to stop counting calories, worrying about what other people are eating, or feeling ashamed on the scale. Balance is key.  Balancing proteins and carbohydrates will help maintain energy at a constant level, rather than riding a rollercoaster of sugar highs and crashes.  She addresses the issues of food addiction but there is not a sense of pity in her words.  Rather, she is matter-of-fact, explaining the process of food addiction as it relates to the various areas of the brain:

Motivation is a junction of brain signals and those signals depend on reliable messengers and intact nerve pathways.  When we look at addiction as a neurological malfunction rather than as a moral failure, it suddenly takes on the form of something that can be fixed.

She encourages readers to look at the role that food plays in their lives.  Do you eat when you are bored?  Sad?  Lonely?  Stressed?  How do you feel after you eat?  Gross?  Unhappy?  Delirious?  There is a chart to fill out when you are hungry, how hungry you are, and how you are feeling emotionally before, during and after you eat.

The most important aspect of Manage Your Depression Through Exercise is the constant attention to readers’ emotions. There are charts for the reader to track their emotional state before, during, and after each workout.  Dr. Baxter includes areas to write any distracting thoughts and emotions that may be getting in the way of the workout.  There are personal exercises that provoke readers to look at what they want out of their lives and how they express their emotions.  Do you want to get out of your depression?  Do you vocalize your anger in a healthy manner?  Alternatively, do you explode and throw objects? 

Each chapter has at least two or three sections to remind readers to pay attention to what they are feeling.  Although this sounds redundant, Dr. Baxter addresses various emotions in each section in order to cover the full spectrum by the end of the book.  Therefore, regardless if the real issue is loneliness, food addiction, or anger, Dr. Baxter provides questions and suggestions for working through emotional blocks.

I found Dr. Baxter’s book truly motivating.  Although I personally do not suffer from depression, I can say that I understand being emotionally wrapped up and unable to motivate myself to move.  Within the first few pages of her book, I felt like going for a jog.  During my workouts, I remembered many of the things that she discussed. For example, she comments on working through any emotions that come up during a workout because, physiologically, I have turned up a notch by going for a run. 

I feel that Manage Your Depression Through Exercise is an excellent book for anyone who has struggled with being overwhelmed emotionally. I have already put my copy in the mail to a friend.

Manage Your Depression Through Exercise: The Motivation You Need to Start and Maintain an Exercise Program
By Jane Baxter, PhD
Sunrise River Press: August 15, 2011
Paperback, 192 pages
$14.95

In addition to nourishing your body and participating in physical activities you enjoy, there are many other ways you can improve your mental health.

According to clinical psychologist Ryan Howes, Ph.D, “well-being is associated with balance, understanding, acceptance and constant growth.” Below you’ll find 15 ways to help you flourish and bolster your well-being.

1. Accept your emotions. “Some would argue that most of our physical, mental and relational problems come from our inability to adequately experience emotions,” Howes said. “We deny, bury, project, rationalize, medicate, drink away, smother in comfort food, sleep off, sweat out, suck (it) up and sweep under the rug our sadness, anger and fear.”

Some people spend more energy on avoiding their emotions than others do on actually feeling them, he said. So the key is to give yourself unconditional permission to feel your feelings. “When you feel safe enough to let your guard down, whether that’s alone or with someone you trust, you can focus on the situation, fully experience the feelings and may then be able to better understand why it hurts and what you want to do about the situation,” Howes said.

Writing about negative emotions also helps. According to clinical psychologist Darlene Mininni, research has shown that people who write about their deepest emotions are less depressed and more positive about life than before they started writing. To reap the benefits, it’s important to follow a few guidelines. Here’s Mininni’s emotional writing guide.

2. Take daily risks. Structure and routine are important. But you also might get stuck in a rut. And that means you’re not growing, Howes said. Taking certain risks can be healthy and rewarding, he said.

“Challenge yourself to take a risk each day, whether it’s talking to someone new, asserting yourself, trusting someone, dancing, setting a tough workout goal or anything that pushes you out of your comfort zone.”

3. Live in the present. “Mental health tends to become challenged when we get sucked into what used to happen or what people ‘did to me’ rather than taking responsibility in what I am doing or creating today, right now,” according to psychotherapist Jeffrey Sumber. He encouraged readers to live in the present without hyperfocusing on the future or the past.

4. Be introspective. Avoid coasting through life without assessing yourself, Sumber said. For instance, he periodically asks himself questions such as “Am I in denial about anything or resisting anything anywhere in my life?”

Duffy also suggested stepping back and considering where your thoughts, feelings and behaviors are coming from. You might ask: Is that thought helpful? It that behavior necessary? Is there a better option?

5. Laugh. “Sometimes, we take life far too seriously,” Duffy said. Need proof? Duffy ran across information that revealed that kids laugh about 200 times per day; adults laugh an average of 15 times per day. He suggested everything from seeing a funny movie to playing games like Charades or Apples to Apples.

6. Determine and live your personal values. “[Your values] serve as an ‘inner GPS system’ that guides you through life, helping you make the right decisions and keeping you on track,” said Megan Walls, CPC, PCC, ELI-MP, a certified executive and life coach and owner of Conscious Connection. “Knowing and living your values will lead to a sense of balance, confidence and fulfillment.”

7. Identify and use your individual strengths. Using your strengths, Walls said, helps you feel energized and empowered. Not sure what your strengths are? Walls recommended Tom Rath’s StrengthsFinders 2.0, which features 34 strength themes and an assessment.

8. Keep tabs on your thoughts. Without even knowing it, you might be caught in a vicious cycle of negative thoughts, which seem to sprout naturally. Not only do these thoughts sink our mood but we also start to see them as truths.

Fortunately, we can work through these thoughts and see them for what they are: untrue and changeable. Walls suggested monitoring your thoughts and challenging and replacing negative ones. (Here are four questions to ask to reduce automatic negative thoughts.)

9. Practice gratitude. “You’ll find you shift your overall outlook on life when you come form a perspective of gratitude,” Duffy said. He suggested readers make a list of three things they’re thankful for every morning.

Another idea is to recite at least 10 reasons why you’re grateful for your job, according to Master Certified life and career coach Kristin Taliaferro. “Look for unexpected surprises such as ‘my sunny office window’ or ‘cool work friends to have lunch with.’”

For inspiration, you might check out Living Life as a Thank You by Mary Beth Sammons and Nina Lesowitz. It’s filled with inspiring stories of gratitude, according to Duffy.

10. Discover or rediscover a passion. Take the time to consider your passions. For instance, Duffy’s wife recently tried painting, and found that she loves it and is really talented. “Without a doubt, it has done great things for her overall sense of well-being,” he said.

11. Do what makes you happy first thing. Sometimes it can feel like you’re going through your days on autopilot, and that can get tedious and depressing. Start your day off on a positive note by engaging in an enjoyable activity every morning.

One of Taliaferro’s clients started swimming at a YMCA pool in the a.m. She told Taliaferro that it’s completely shifted her outlook and lifted her mood.

12. Get rid of rotten eggs. “There’s usually at least one rotten egg in your life that’s dragging down your mental outlook,” Taliaferro said. For example, some of Taliaferro’s clients are especially affected by the news. One of her clients decided that if it’s not on the AOL homepage then she doesn’t need to know about it.

Identify your rotten eggs and figure out how to remove them. Your rotten eggs might seem small. But even annoyances can add up and chip away at your mood and well-being.

13. Surround yourself with positive scents and sounds. Our surroundings can affect our well-being. “You can create a positive feeling at home with lemon, peppermint or other essential oils you love,” Taliaferro said. She plays different kinds of music regularly depending on what she’s in the mood for.

14. Get inspired. Find inspiration in everything from subscribing to a daily quote (like this one) to listening to uplifting audio books on the way to work to reading magazines with exciting ideas, Taliaferro said. Duffy also suggested reading Inspiration by Wayne Dyer, which is one of his favorites.

15. Carve out time to meditate. “Protect a few minutes each day to sit, relax and breathe,” Duffy said. People tend to think that meditation is complicated. But you don’t need much time or effort to meditate, and it’s quite soothing. Try this super simple meditation from Mininni.

As the years progressed, the American family began to change. Divorce rates soared and the number of single-parent households rose. Families began to take on a different shape. Stepfamilies — families with one or both parents married previously with children–became more and more common.

As the times changed, TV changed along with it. Shows centered on stepfamilies began to air. These shows rarely portray what a stepfamily is like in reality, however. One TV sitcom about a stepfamily in particular, “Step-by-Step,” is exceptionally fictitious.

As with many TV shows that are supposed to merely entertain, many situations are exaggerated for effect and plots are stretched to inconceivable limits. The characters seem unbelievably naive and get involved in ridiculous predicaments.

“Step-by-Step” is no exception. The two parents of the show, Carol and Frank, had each been married before and had children from these marriages. Carol has three kids, and Frank has two. During the first season of the show, only a few episodes focused on the issue of the new family, such as the kids not getting along or everyone having to make adjustments because of the new situation. Halfway through the first season, though, all family problems seemed to be resolved and the plots began to resemble a typical sitcom’s. Being part of a stepfamily myself, I know firsthand that the short-lived “problems” the characters in “Step-by-Step” experienced don’t resemble at all what the members in a stepfamily must go through in real life.

Along with having “normal” family problems, such as raising teenagers and staying on a budget, stepfamilies have many other issues to deal with. No mention was ever made in the show about ex-spouses, child support, or visitation rights, yet all these things play a large role in a typical stepfamily. This could simply be because Carol’s and Frank’s ex-spouses weren’t in the picture for one reason or another and never posed a problem, but the children never mentioned their other parent either, which again seems highly unrealistic.

The biggest discrepancy between the TV stepfamily and a real life stepfamily is the relationships of the family members with one another. Everyone on the show gets along pretty well, even for a traditional family. In the beginning, Carol’s oldest daughter didn’t get along well with Frank (which is not at all uncommon in a stepfamily); there were also a few problems with Carol’s girls and Frank’s daughter not getting along. But these situations were handled in the typical TV fashion — rather lightly and very short-lived.

In reality, however, such circumstances are not so easy to deal with. One important problem in a stepfamily is the relationship between stepparents and stepchildren. If the children’s biological parents keep in contact with them, the kids might not regard their stepparents as legitimate parts of their life. If the children have a “real” mom or dad, why would they need a step-dad or step-mom? The child might resent the new stepparent for trying to take the place of their natural parent. The biological parent, in turn, might try to pull the child away from the stepparent, feeling threatened by the new parent’s presence. If a child’s natural parent is no longer around, the child may feel that there is no true parent for him or her and not accept the new stepparent.

This very problem happened in my family. Sharon, my mother, commented on this, saying, “My husband made no effort to reach out to my older kids. My youngest didn’t even remember his father at all, so my husband became a father to him, but not to the older ones, who never considered him to be their real father. He has two daughters himself and the same thing happened with them toward me. They had a mother, so I was just considered to be their father’s wife.”

These kinds of attitudes that children and stepparents might have toward each other create other hassles for the family as well. Discipline problems are extremely common. Is the child going to be disciplined by the new stepparent, the natural parent, or both? In cases where there are children in the family from both the stepparent and the natural parent, favoritism may occur, in discipline and elsewhere.

The “her kids, my kids” syndrome becomes all too familiar in this kind of situation among stepfamilies, causing tension not only among the parents, but affecting the children’s relationships with each other. My mother and stepfather would argue constantly about punishments given to us kids. My step-dad would intervene and not be so strict with his own kids, but with my brothers and me, he would never get involved.

This eventually started affecting my relationship with my stepsisters. I began to resent them for it, but I never wanted to start anything with them, so I kept my mouth shut. I would complain to my mother, who claimed she understood but couldn’t do anything about it and my relationship with her worsened too. My family was extremely volatile. Bitter arguments could erupt at any given time, so everyone was careful to tiptoe around the house so as not to offend anyone.

The stress of dealing with family problems is probably not unfamiliar to anyone. In a stepfamily, the stress level is even greater because of the greater number of problems involved. Many stepfamilies go through counseling to help everyone deal with the issues that come up. About a year after my two stepsisters began to live with us, my family was having a lot of problems. They weren’t respecting my mother as a parent and my stepfather would constantly take their side against my mother.

My family was divided down the middle. Counseling helped us through some tough times and I believe it was beneficial to all of us. Today we still have some problems beneath the surface that haven’t been dealt with yet, but overall, things are better.

When I asked my mom what she thought of shows that depicted stepfamilies (in particular, “Step-by-Step”) she answered, “Well, it’s all right. Sometimes it’s funny, but I wouldn’t go any further than that. No one should look at this show and assume that that’s how a typical stepfamily is.” She says that if shows that were realistic about stepfamilies were aired on TV and people could see the emotional trauma and problems involved, maybe people would think twice about getting divorced and remarried.

“It’s not that easy,” Sharon said.

While TV today is trying to reflect the changing times, it’s not always doing a good job. “Step-by-Step” is simply a sitcom shown for entertainment, but what makes the show unique is that it involves a stepfamily. At the same time, however, it doesn’t give a realistic picture of what a typical stepfamily is like.

A true portrayal of real life could be beneficial for everyone and while some other current issues are being addressed, to my knowledge, an honest picture of a stepfamily has yet to come. I agree with my mom in saying that perhaps if people knew what to expect concerning forming a second family that maybe they’d be a little more hesitant to end a marriage. Since television plays a large role in Americans’ lives, it seems to be the only way to convey the message. Shows like “Step-by-Step” just don’t serve any purpose in this endeavor.

“Did you ever reach a point in your life,” he asks, “where you say to yourself, ‘This is the best I’m ever going to look, the best I’m ever going to feel, the best I’m ever going to do? And it ain’t that great?’”

That’s as good a description as any of what a midlife crisis is all about. Of course, Billy Crystal’s alter ego is far from the only hombre to ride nervously past the buzzards of Midlife Gulch. Ulysses, Dante, and Michelangelo have been there. So have Sigmund Freud and Carl Jung.

In his late thirties, Shakespeare switched from writing comedies to writing tragedies, producing in the process King Lear, Macbeth, Hamlet, and Othello — all tales of men who discover too late that their lives have gone seriously awry.

What is This Vague, Uncomfortable Feeling?

What, exactly, constitutes a midlife crisis? Experts agree there’s no single definition, although a pervasive sense of disappointment and a nagging feeling that time’s running out would be among the major characteristics. Larry Bumpass, Ph.D., a sociologist at the University of Wisconsin in Madison who directs the National Survey of Families and Households, says there’s “an array” of at least 40 events that commonly occur at midlife, from losing a job to the death of a parent, a flagging libido, divorce, or illness.

Midlife for men today is tougher than it’s ever been, says Ronald Levant, Ed.D., a psychologist who teaches at Harvard Medical School. The Ozzie and Harriet model of family life no longer prevails, he says, and new demands on men can exacerbate the confusion of midlife transition.

“It’s more of a crisis now than it might have been for our fathers because of the dynamic changes in the role of women and the structure of the American family,” Dr. Levant says. “Midlife men are now living with role expectations that are vastly different from when they grew up. The traditional masculine code has been broken.”

No Need to Panic

Many experts believe the word “crisis” overstates the degree of angst most middle-age men experience. These same experts also say that many of the stereotypes about men at midlife-such as their burning desire to hold onto youth by latching onto a younger woman-aren’t necessarily true. “Sure, we all know somebody who left his wife for his secretary when he was 45. But men leave their wives when they’re younger, too,” says Dr. Bumpass.

In fact, Dr. Bumpass’s research demonstrates quite clearly that the risk of divorce actually declines the longer people are married. Another study, conducted at the New England Research Institute by psychologist John B. McKinlay, Ph.D. showed that only 2 percent of over 1,700 middle age and older men surveyed reported having more than one current sexual partner, a far lower rate than the stereotypes would have us believe.

The word “crisis” applies more to how midlife transitions are handled than to the fact that transitions are taking place, says Leonard Felder, Ph.D., a psychologist in private practice in Los Angeles and an expert on midlife and career issues.

“Most people between the ages of 30 and 50 go through some major shifts in the way they see themselves and the way they feel about their lives,” he says. “That’s normal. It’s a crisis if men act impulsively during it. If they throw away their wives, kids, friends, then it’s a crisis. If they carefully think this through, it’s a fascinating transition.”

Take Stock of Your Life

That midlife regrets can serve as a potent catalyst for personal growth is a theme sounded repeatedly by experts from many disciplines. “I would go so far as to call it a midlife opportunity,” says Marsha Sinetar, Ph.D., an organizational psychologist and the author of Do What You Love; the Money Will Follow. “It’s time to look at questions like, Who am I? What do I believe? What do I really need? Those are issues worth examining. This means taking yourself seriously, perhaps for the first time.”

The first recommended step for getting the most out of your midlife agonies is to listen to them. Therapists say there’s a strong temptation to deny the questions that come up at midlife because the answers are sometimes threatening.

“Accept what’s happening,” says Dr. Sinetar. “Try to relax into the chaos. Trust that you’re going to find something wonderful in it.”

The coming of the New Year is a fantastic opportunity for you to energize yourself toward achieving your goals. If you are a big procrastinator, you may be skeptical of resolutions; for you, resolutions might be just one more way to feel bad for getting stuck and unable to move forward — even toward goals that you really, truly want to achieve. So, this one year, all of you experts in procrastination get your own special No. 1 New Year’s resolution: Free yourself from the bonds of procrastination.

There are a variety of procrastination styles. Some of you may struggle with starting a project (task initiation). Some of you may have a hard time sticking with a project (focused attention). Some of you just can’t seem to finish a project (task completion). Some of you have trouble every step of the way.

Everyone does some procrastinating. People naturally put off and avoid doing things that cause them discomfort, distress, or trigger challenging emotions. Even if you are very much in favor of reaching a particular goal, there are often parts of the process of getting there that you just do not want to do.

Procrastinating becomes a problem when your internal battle between the part of you that knows you should do something (your inner ‘do it’), and the part of you that just DOES NOT WANT TO (your inner ‘I don’t want to’), drains your energy and causes problems in your home life, your relationships, your work, or your self-care.

This battle can be a war of aggression, with your inner ‘do it’ attempting to bully and threaten your inner ‘I don’t want to’ into submission, saying things like ‘what is WRONG with you, why aren’t you doing what YOU SAID you wanted to do? You are so lame, just do it, what is your PROBLEM? Other people finish home projects, what is wrong with YOU? WHY are you eating that brownie when you KNOW you want to lose weight?’

The battle can be a war of avoidance, as your inner ‘I don’t want to’ shuts out your inner ‘do it’ through busyness and distraction with other activities or by zoning out with food, alcohol, TV, or the Internet. The inner war can get so depleting that you end up curled on the couch, unable to do anything at all, or frantically expending adrenaline-charged energy to meet deadlines, and then crashing again with exhaustion.

7 Self-Talk Tips to Help You Stay on Track

So, if you find yourself stuck, rushed and tired, getting in trouble with your spouse or boss, or feeling like a failure for not honoring your self-care goals, then you may be interested in a trying a new way to motivate yourself. As you cower under the dark cloud of something you ‘should’ be doing, tune in and listen to that part of you that is saying ‘no, I don’t want to.’ What it is afraid of? What is it angry about?

Then, use these seven self-talk tips to speak nicely but firmly to that inner ‘I don’t want to:’

1. Empathy.

‘I know that you don’t want to sit down at the computer and work on your resume.’ ‘I know that your vision for this project isn’t turning into reality. I know you just hate having to accept that time has run out and you need to finish up and have an imperfect result.’ ‘I know that it causes you distress to face the truth of your finances and start budgeting.’ ‘I know that you’d prefer to avoid dealing with your body and starting an exercise plan.’ ‘I know you thought that finishing this project would happen much more quickly, and you are frustrated with how long it is taking.’ ‘I get it. It makes sense that you feel frustrated, worried and annoyed.’

2. Encouragement to explore different practical strategies for motivation.

‘Why don’t you start exploring the wide range of practical hints and strategies available from counselors, in books and online to help you get going and stay on track toward your goals? Just pick one and give it a try. Try scheduling your workout on your calendar, try using an alarm clock to keep yourself moving from task to task, try using inspirational quotes taped on your mirror. Just try it. If it doesn’t work for you, try another until you find one that does help.’

3. Encouragement to ask for help.

‘I know you think you should be able to do this on your own. I know that you think it’s silly that the hardest part of this task is formatting your resume. How about asking for help from your spouse with that one part?’ ‘I know you think that calling your insurance provider about that medical bill should be easy. But it’s just not easy for you. Why don’t you ask a friend to sit with you while you pick up the phone and dial the number?’

4. Permission to go one step at a time.

‘You don’t have to do this all at once. You get to go at a pace that is healthy for you. Just take one step at a time. Today can be the step of writing down a few notes about what you want to include in your resume. Use five minutes and take this one step.’

5. Insistence on starting TODAY, even amid uncertainty.

‘You don’t have to wait until you are completely sure of the whole process before you start it. You don’t have to know whether you want a new job before you start working on your resume.’ ‘You are not committing to anything by putting on your walking shoes. Just put them on. Now.’

6. Permission to change course if necessary.

‘You get to change course if the project or routine becomes too much for you, or turns out to not be a good fit for you. Everyone has his or her own ‘overwhelm threshold,’ and though you may wish your threshold were higher, it is what it is. You also do not always know in advance if something will be a good fit for you. It may be uncomfortable to have to reroute yourself, and you may feel disappointed in yourself and you may disappoint others. But if you try to force yourself forward with something that you fear may become too much for you or may turn out to be wrong for you, and imprison yourself with the idea that you have to follow through no matter what, then you are going to end up not taking any steps forward. So you have got to remember that you can change course if necessary.’

7. Reminders that you are human.

‘You, just like all humans, need help, have uncertainty, move slowly at times, move sideways, move backwards, try and fail, feel foolish, have regrets, and must adjust plans as new information becomes available. You, like all humans, have limitations and vulnerabilities. You, like all humans, get disappointed in yourself and disappoint other people sometimes. You, like all humans, sometimes struggle with the letdown of grand visions turning into imperfect realities. And yes, ‘all humans’ includes you.’

I know you wish you didn’t have this issue with procrastination, and could just magically become a person who is able to easily ‘just do it.’ But you are a human, and this is one of your issues, and it takes energy and time to make changes in your self. Just experiment with this new way of talking to yourself. Right now. Pick one thing you’ve been procrastinating about, choose one of these seven points and try it for five seconds. See if it helps. Just try.

Diminishing estrogen levels can actually exacerbate symptoms, and for some women, the decline is sudden and dramatic. Hormonal fluctuations affect our brain’s biochemistry and thereby ADHD symptoms, according to Dr. Patricia Quinn, M.D., a developmental pediatrician and director of the National Center for Girls and Women with AD/HD.

Specifically, estrogen affects the release of the neurotransmitters serotonin and dopamine. “[A deficiency in] dopamine is responsible for increasing ADHD symptoms,” she said, while less serotonin leads to depressed mood. (That’s why women feel so miserable during their menstrual cycles when estrogen levels dip.)

“Because a lack of dopamine is a hallmark sign of ADHD, this additional change in dopamine can lead to even greater difficulties with concentration and focus,” said Stephanie Sarkis, Ph.D, a national certified counselor and licensed mental health counselor and author of 10 Simple Solutions to Adult ADD and Adult ADD: A Guide for the Newly Diagnosed.

Some women also find that their ADHD medications are less effective during perimenopause and menopause. As a result, doctors often increase the dose. But this may be ineffective, Dr. Quinn said, because there’s nothing being done about the low estrogen levels.

What You Can Do About ADHD and Menopause

“A lot of women are blindsided by [worsening ADHD symptoms],” Dr. Quinn said. But she and Sarkis emphasized that women with ADHD do have effective options, and by addressing their symptoms can successfully minimize them and function and feel better. Here are several of their suggestions.

1. Consult your psychiatrist.

If your symptoms are getting worse or your medication isn’t working as effectively, share this information with your psychiatrist. If you aren’t working with a psychiatrist now, find one that specializes in ADHD, Sarkis said.

Stimulants and non-stimulants are highly effective in easing ADHD symptoms (along with behavioral changes). And studies have shown that both improve cognitive functioning and attention in menopausal women without ADHD. (For instance, this study looked at the efficacy of non-stimulant atomoxetine.)

2. Consult your gynecologist, too.

Make sure that your gynecologist knows about your ADHD (or cognitive concerns, if you haven’t been diagnosed) and the medications you’re taking. Sarkis also suggested signing “releases so that your psychiatrist and gynecologist have open communication about your symptoms.”

Hormone therapy may be helpful for some women in improving cognitive functioning. However, it is controversial, so Dr. Quinn suggested patients and their gynecologists extensively weigh the benefits and risks. For instance, hormone therapy may be too risky for women with a family history of breast or endometrial cancer, she said. But for women without such a history and whose functioning is dramatically exacerbated, hormone therapy may provide major relief. Also, she noted that more recent research contradicts some of the findings from the Women’s Health Initiative postmenopausal hormone therapy trials.

Dr. Quinn added that oftentimes women end up educating both their psychiatrist and gynecologist about menopause’s effect on ADHD. She suggested readers bring information to their physicians (such as this handout on hormonal fluctuations).

3. Assess your strengths and weaknesses.

Identify the areas of your life that are being affected and the activities that have become difficult for you, Dr. Quinn said. Women may have extra trouble with everything from staying organized and managing their time to making decisions, being impulsive and forgetting things. As Dr. Quinn said, it can feel like “you’re slogging through mud,” and everyday activities are extra overwhelming.

Also, keep in mind that you can experience cognitive difficulties even when you still have your period. In fact, according to Dr. Quinn, “your estrogen starts going down 10 years before your period stops,” which can occur in your late 30s or early 40s. You also might find yourself unable to manage activities that you were able to before.

4. Create an “ADHD-friendly life.”

Dr. Quinn suggested that readers simplify their lives and set up what she calls an ADHD-friendly life. This simply means taking your symptoms, strengths and challenges into account. You may want to hire a professional organizer, work with an ADHD coach, get active and “take time for yourself,” which you absolutely deserve, she said.

Here’s additional insight on working through various areas of your life:

• Coping with common symptoms
• Studying and completing assignments
• Being more productive and organized
• Succeeding in the workplace
• Improving romantic relationships
• Overcoming common financial pitfalls

And here are links to Amazon.com for the books mentioned in this article:

• 10 Simple Solutions to Adult ADD: How to Overcome Chronic Distraction and Accomplish Your Goals
• Adult ADD: A Guide for the Newly Diagnosed

18 Minutes is divided into four parts. Part 1, called “Pause,” focuses on pulling back, evaluating and gaining an accurate perspective of your life—rather than plugging along doing meaningless things. While this section doesn’t necessarily present any new insights, it does underscore the importance of stopping, taking a breath and figuring out what you truly want.

Part 2, “What Is This Year About?,” helps readers come up with their top five priorities for the year. Bregman outlines four ways to determine your priorities:

• Leverage your strengths
• Embrace your weaknesses
• Assert your differences
• Ppursue your passions

This is an excellent section that provides various thought-provoking points and questions that readers can ask themselves. It helps readers figure out what matters most to them. Bregman also features many interesting insights. For instance, on embracing your weaknesses, he writes:

“The most interesting novels,” Newsweek editor Malcolm Jones wrote in a recent book review, “are the ones where the flaws and virtues can’t be pulled apart.”

That’s even truer for people. The most powerful ones don’t conquer their dysfunctions, quirks and potentially embarrassing insecurities. They seamlessly integrate them to make an impact in the world.

In Part 3, “What Is This Day About?,” readers learn how to distill their annual goals into a daily to-do list along with helpful hints on handling the tasks. The goal is to spend 95 percent on activities that you love and find fulfilling and the other 5 percent on miscellaneous, such as paying bills or changing the oil in your car. In other words, you create your task list based on your annual goals and make sure that the bulk consists of meaningful activities.

One of Bregman’s helpful hints is creating an “ignore list,” which is a fantastic idea. It includes the things that get in your way and aren’t important to you. (For many of us that includes mindless Internet surfing or TV watching.) Another is to set your phone to ring every hour. Bregman uses this to evaluate how he’s spending his time. Even more importantly, he asks himself a key question at every chime. He writes:

…When it goes off, I take that deep breath and ask myself, if in the last hour, I’ve been the person I want to be. In other words, during that pause, I deliberately recommit to not just what I’m going to do, but also who I’m going to be over the next hour. It’s a way of staying recognizable to myself and to others.

Here, Bregman also offers an explanation for the 18 Minutes in the title. He suggests that readers simply carve out 18 minutes each day to stay focused on their priorities. Specifically, the 18 minutes are made up of three steps.

In step 1, readers spend five minutes in the morning before turning on their computer to plan their day (“What can you realistically accomplish that will further your focus for the year and allow you to leave at the end of the day feeling that you’ve been productive and successful?”)

Step 2 takes just one minute every hour to help you refocus on and recommit to your day. During this minute, you ask yourself whether you’ve been productive and been the person you want to be.

The last step involves taking five minutes every evening and evaluating how the day went, such as asking yourself: “What did I learn about myself?”

Part 4, “What Is This Moment About?,” covers mastering distraction by mastering your initiative, boundaries and yourself. Bregman teaches readers how to use distractions to their advantage, overcome perfectionism and determine when you should say yes or no to someone.

In the conclusion, called “Now What?,” Bregman urges readers to do just one thing. Instead of getting overwhelmed and overcomplicating your life, just take the step that’s most meaningful to you. This is wise and valuable advice. (On a side note, one of the examples Bregman uses is losing weight. He says that weight loss is simply a matter of eating less, which is a common misconception. Plus, in our society, we’re inundated enough with weight talk as it is.)

In addition to the book’s smart advice, another strength lies in its simplicity. You won’t find any convoluted organizational systems or tools here. It doesn’t overwhelm you with tons of tips and to-dos. Rather, Bregman’s book helps readers ask themselves the important questions, learn helpful tidbits on productivity and really see their life more clearly. It’s written in a straightforward, conversational style and shares relatable anecdotes, many of which come from Bregman’s personal life.

Another strength is that 18 Minutes is very motivating and encouraging. It gives readers the nudge they might need to figure out what a fulfilling life looks like, along with, again, a simple and straightforward plan to follow through. Overall, this book will no doubt become an important tool for readers in accomplishing their goals and enjoying the day-to-day process.

This book offers alternatives, or complements, to the pharmaceuticals that have become the go-to treatment for much of the treatment of mental illness today.  The information in this book goes beyond the typical diet, exercise, and lifestyle advice normally presented as the natural ways of dealing with mental illness.  While those areas are covered, some of the other ideas require more of a belief, or at least openness to, some other more “New Age” treatment methods, including Shamanism.  I found the information presented to be interesting and clearly presented, though a lot of it seemed a bit impractical for most people as it involved the service of professionals in very specialized fields that many people would not have access to either financially or geographically.

Natural medicine is based on the knowledge that in order for comprehensive healing to occur, the factors causing or contributing to a disorder must be identified and addressed in each person.  With this approach, it is possible for people to get off their drugs or reduce their dosages, and in so doing improve their present and future health.

The introduction provides numerous statistics for bipolar disorder, and mental illness in general, in the U.S. and around the world.  After that the book is divided into two parts (plus an appendix): The Basics of Bipolar and Natural Medicine Treatments for Bipolar Disorder.  Throughout the book Marohn supplied quotes from patients, practitioners, & families about living with bipolar disorder and experiences with the relevant method of treatment.  Likewise there are many anecdotal sections within the chapters.

Part I contains two chapters: “What Is Bipolar Disorder and Who Suffers from It?” and “Causes, Triggers, and Contributors.“  In Chapter 1 we are introduced to the different types of bipolar disorder and how it affects specific populations, as well as the history of its treatment: “…often the mood swings of bipolar disorder are inexplicable, bearing no apparent relation to what is happening in a person’s life.“

Chapter 2 covers what little is known, and some about what is not known, about bipolar disorder, and focuses on 20 factors believed to play a role in the disorder.  A few of those are genetics, stress, allergies, physical health problems, and environmental toxicities.  “From a holistic viewpoint, a single physiological cause or even one such cause in combination with a genetic abnormality is not the sum total of a condition such as bipolar disorder.  Perhaps research has been unable to identify an “etiological agent” because “mental illness” is the outcome of body-mind-spirit disturbance caused by physical, psychological, emotional, spiritual,  and energetic influences, each of which affects all of the other areas, so no influence can be considered in isolation.”  The end of the chapter is an action plan for determining which of these factors could be affecting one’s own illness.

Part II includes eight different treatments for bipolar disorder from the natural medicine field, many of them overlapping in areas.  Chapter 3 covers the Five Levels of Healing: Physical Level, Electromagnetic Level, Mental Level, Intuitive Level, & Spiritual Level, a model developed by Dr. Dietrich Klinghardt that is similar to many of the systems used in other chapters.  “A basic principle of Dr. Klinghardt’s paradigm is that an interference or imbalance on one level, if untreated, spreads upward or downward to the other levels.”

The remaining chapters cover biological and biochemical treatments, amino acids, cranial osteopathy, allergy elimination techniques, homeopathy, and the shamanic view of mental illness.

The last chapter, on shamanism, intrigued me the most. Marohn covered a few different viewpoints on this, varying by cultural beliefs and including foreign practitioners’ views on how the American mental health system works.  “Taking a sacred-ritual approach to mental illness rather than regarding the person as a pathological case gives the person affected – and indeed the community at large – the opportunity to begin looking at it from that vantage point too…”

All the practitioners whose work is included in this book can be found in the Resources section of the appendix.  This includes the contact information for their practices and a full list of their specialties.

In the conclusion, Marohn tells us “Every illness has the potential to teach those afflicted how to take better care of themselves.  While you might think that you are already doing that — by eating a good diet and exercising, for example — illness has a way of highlighting those areas you have neglected.  Illness teaches you to attend to body, mind and spirit and shows you the parts of you that are hurting.  If you seize this opportunity, you can bring the different levels of yourself into alignment and find your way to a sense of wholeness that brings joy and contentment with it.”

I think these are excellent words no matter how an individual chooses to treat his or her bipolar disorder.

The author set out to present information on several natural methods of treating bipolar disorder, and this was done in a well organized and interesting way.  While it is by no means exhaustive, she introduced me to many techniques of which I was not previously aware.  Most of the literature I have read on natural treatments for mental illness mainly stuck to the issues of diet and exercise, including supplementation with herbs, vitamins, and minerals. The book is relatively short for all it covers, but gives a good base for seeking further information on any method of interest.  It provides many alternatives to the now typical pharma, both new tech and those going back to before modern medicine.

The Natural Medicine Guide to Bipolar Disorder: New Revised Edition
By Stephanie Marohn
Hampton Roads Publishing Company: July 15, 2011
Paperback, 240 pages
$16.95

While it does contain teachings that hint at ways we might improve our municipalities, the book does not contain an integrated, sequential, or specific set of lessons that we may follow to improve our own city blocks. Part memoir, part intriguing biology lesson, and part introduction to ways we may reconsider specific aspects of human life—such as education—in order to improve them, The Neighborhood Project is at its best when its author veers away from reminiscence and anecdotal narration to focus on his specialty: biology, and the diverse ways evolutionary thinking can help us shift our comprehension of human structures and behaviors so that we are more open to, and more cognizant of the conditions necessary for, positive societal change.

Usually, when I read books that invoke biology to talk about human and societal issues, they directly integrate each lesson about insects or animals with lessons for the human world. Therefore I expected chapters like “The Parable of the Wasp,” “The Parable of the Strider,” and “The Parable of the Crows” to be followed by chapters in which their practical application for community improvement was developed in detail. I thought this might happen via a description of changes that occurred as a result of the Binghamton Neighborhood Project, which David Sloan Wilson describes as a “whole university/whole city approach to community-based research,” since the book purports to focus on Binghamton.  At the end of the book, however, I was still slightly fuzzy about what has changed, concretely, as a result of the community-based research exploration of Binghamton.

Instead, in The Neighborhood Project, references to other species more often invoke than outline the applications of biological evolution and species development for human communities. These applications, which aren’t always tied to a clear progression of ideas, hover like half-hidden jewels that a reader can look at later, applying the light of his or her own mind to find suggestions and draw conclusions.  As a seminarian and developing theologian, as well as a writer and former college instructor of literature and writing, I can buy Sloan Wilson’s assertion that “science is a medium for listening and reflecting on the human condition, much like religion and literature.”

And that is the way I would suggest readers approach this book: as a tool for listening and reflection on the human condition. The kind of reflection I suggest does not require a crescendo of learning, or a linear progression of ideas. Rather, it is the kind of reflection in which ideas float to the surface when I least expect them, and my brain naturally puts together David Sloan Wilson’s ideas and my own thoughts and experience. The book meanders from topic to topic, but it is full of interesting facts. I learned much from it, for which I am grateful.

For instance: I now know why and how wasps feed their young and, in turn, are fed by them. I’ve learned that there are both social and solitary wasps. I have learned how water striders reproduce, a topic I never would have expected to read with avid interest, but one that turns out to be oddly compelling and slightly poetic. I enjoyed finding out about Pierre Teilhard de Chardin’s scientific career; B.F. Skinner’s connection to prevention science; the ways that Wisconsin and Wyoming mounted successful campaigns to decrease the sale of tobacco to minors.

As a mother, I found ideas I could apply in highly practical ways. The chapter entitled “Learning from Mother Nature about Teaching Our Children” confirmed and explained why mixed-age learning is effective, and affirmed my own observations that “mixed-age interactions tend to moderate bullying.” I learned why “risk factors such as poverty and neglect” have more of an impact on some children than on others, and received a more thorough understanding of how children can positively and negatively affect one another’s behaviors. When my third-grade son got off the bus this afternoon, and was in trouble with the bus driver because he and his friends had been throwing raisins, I was able to modify some of my learning from The Neighborhood Project to help him better understand his behavior.

The cornucopia of ideas in this book is rich, indeed. Perhaps my strongest criticism of the manuscript has to do with the many little asides that lead nowhere, including biographical anecdotes about other scientists and about the author himself. There are only so many times an author can be awed by meeting this scientist or that, and still encourage any awe in his reader. I have learned much more than is necessary about where David Sloan Wilson went, why he felt he did or did not succeed at presenting his topic to other people, when he felt grateful to be wined and dined, how good a particular colleague was at his job, etcetera. These details can feel gratuitous, and as I was reading, they distracted me from the high-quality information found elsewhere in The Neighborhood Project. They also help contribute to a feeling of haphazard construction within and between the chapters.

Nonetheless, I would recommend this book to anyone who might like to ponder the writer’s thesis “…if evolutionary theory can be used to understand the human condition, it can also be used to improve it.”  I came away from the book convinced that this thesis is valid and also important. There is theological and scientific reflection in here, alongside compelling narratives that help us to see other species with increasing accuracy, layered with useful information about our own species. There is high-quality writing, too: the language is clear and evocative, neither flowery nor purely utilitarian. This, coupled with the high-quality information contained within it, makes The Neighborhood Project a pleasure to read, well worth an investment of careful attention and time.

The Neighborhood Project: Using Evolution to Improve My City, One Block at a Time
By David Sloan Wilson
Little, Brown and Company: August 24, 2011
Hardcover, 448 pages
$25.99

There are several medical options for dealing with stress. While medications can be helpful, many individuals want to avoid taking them every day or dealing with possible side effects.

There are several natural remedies to consider when dealing with stress.

Eating a Healthy Diet

Eating right is not only good for your body physically, but it is also good for emotional health. When we eat better, we feel better. Some suggest a natural body cleanse or detox to jumpstart this process. Avoiding excessive fats, carbs and processed foods will help you feel more energetic and may give you the energy to try other natural techniques. However, before making any changes to your regular diet, discuss options with your physician.

Exercise

Exercise releases endorphins – those “feel-good chemicals” that can improve your mood and leave you feeling good about yourself. It can help you cope with stress and ward off depression and anxiety. Studies also have shown that it can improve immune function, which is often compromised under high amounts of stress.

Having a Positive Attitude

Many individuals fail to recognize the results of a positive attitude. Making lemonade out of lemons can drastically improve one’s day. A positive attitude can leave you feeling more motivated to get things done, which can reduce stress. Having a positive attitude also can allow you to enjoy more success in all areas of your life.

Trying Herbal Remedies

Several herbal remedies can be used to reduce stress. Talk to your physician before beginning to use any, as some can interfere with other medications.

Aromatherapy uses the medicinal properties of plant and herb essential oils to relieve tension and provide stress relief. Lavender, chamomile, rosewood, geranium and frankincense are just a few oils recognized for their calming effects. They also can be used as massage oils.

Some herbs can be taken orally. Again, consult your physician first.

Massage Therapy

A therapeutic massage can encourage relaxation and aid in relieving stress. It has been shown to lower the heart rate, lower blood pressure, relax muscles, and increase endorphins.

Finding the right massage therapist for you is important, so don’t be afraid to ask questions and do a little research. Check into costs and check your health care plan. You may be surprised to find your insurance may cover several sessions. If they are not covered by your healthcare provider, you may find it beneficial to work into your budget.

Massage is generally safe as long as it is done by a licensed therapist. However, they are not appropriate for everyone. Consult your physician first.

Relaxation Techniques

There are several types of relaxation techniques. Deep breathing, progressive muscle relaxation, visualization, and meditation are among the most popular.

Deep breathing involves slow and patterned breathing that has been proven to lower the heart rate, reduce muscle tension, and reduce anger and frustration.

Progressive muscle relaxation focuses on slowly tensing and relaxing each muscle group, allowing you to become more aware of physical sensations in the body.

Visualization includes forming mental images to take a visual journey to a calming place. During visualization it is advised to use as many of the five senses as possible.

Meditation is medically defined by the practice of concentrated focus upon a sound, object, visualization, the breath, movement, or attention itself in order to increase awareness of the present moment, reduce stress, promote relaxation, and enhance personal and spiritual growth. There are many types of meditation, so it is best to find the method that works best for you.

You will find that relaxation techniques take practice. The more you practice, the better you will become. Keep looking until you find the one that is right for you.

This article will cover some of the more popular alternative remedies for clinical depression, many of which have significant research backing to support their use. In many cases, trying an alternative treatment may be sufficient to help alleviate the most distressing symptoms of depression. As with anything you try, you should always talk to your health care professional first, to ensure the treatment is right for you (this is especially true if you’re currently taking certain medications, as they may interact badly with some herbs or diets).

As with any treatment for depression, your results will vary in trying any of the below options. People with more serious or severe depression may experience the least benefit from these kinds of treatments.

You should not try more than one alternative treatment at a time, especially when it comes to herbal remedies. Be patient in waiting to experience the full, beneficial effects of any of the below treatments, as it can take anywhere from 4 to 8 weeks for you to feel it.

St. John’s Wort for Depression

Once you get past the weird name, St. John’s wort is actually one of the most effective herbal remedies to try for depression. St. John’s Wort is the common name for hypericum perforatum, an herbal remedy for the treatment of depression that has become increasingly popular over the past decade in the United States. It is widely used throughout Europe, Germany in particular, where it is licensed for depression, sleep disorders and anxiety. Herbal remedies are considered a form of alternative medicine.

St. John’s Wort is a yellow flower with five petals that grows wild in many parts of the world. It is named for St. John the Baptist because it blooms around June 24, his feast day. In ancient times, this herbal remedy was believed to have powers to ward off evil spirits.

Dozens of research studies have been conducted and published throughout the world on the efficacy of this herb. For instance, in early 2005, the British Medical Journal published an article demonstrating that in a large clinical trial, St. John’s Wort is at least as effective as a commonly-prescribed antidepressant and has fewer side effects in the treatment of moderate to severe major depression (BMJ 2005;330:503 (5 March)).

In 2008, the Cochrane Collaboration — a non-profit research organization that analyzes scientific studies to draw conclusions from them — determined that the overall body of research evidence for the effectiveness of St. John’s Wort in the treatment of depression was strong (Linde et al., 2008).

Cochrane Researchers reviewed 29 trials which together included 5,489 patients with symptoms of major depression. All trials employed the commonly used Hamilton Rating Scale for Depression to assess the severity of depression. In trials comparing St. John’s wort to other remedies, not only were the plant extracts considered to be equally effective, but fewer patients dropped out of trials due to adverse effects. The researchers said, “Overall, we found that the St. John’s wort extracts tested in the trials were superior to placebos and as effective as standard antidepressants, with fewer side effects.” In other words, it works.

When trying St. John’s wort, stick to name brands and look for tablets or capsules standardized to 0.3 percent hypericin. The usual dose is 300 milligrams is two to three times a day with food. Like almost anything you take for depression, it seems like it may take 4 to 8 weeks to experience the full positive effects of this treatment.

S-adenosyl methionine (SAMe)

S-adenosyl methionine (also known as S-adenosylmethionine or simply SAMe) appears to be an effective treatment for depression, as least for short-term use. In a meta-analytic review of 7 studies, a significant improvement was found for patients taking SAMe versus placebo in the treatment of depressive symptoms (Williams et al., 2005). Another, more recent review found virtually the same result, but also lamented that many of the studies examined were of poor scientific quality (Carpenter, 2011).

When considering taking SAMe, again, look for brand name products which typically have higher quality control standards. It’s generally recommended that you look for SAMe in enteric-coated tablets of either 200 mg or 400 mg. The effective dose varies between 400 to 1,600 milligrams a day, taken on an empty stomach. You can take lower doses (under 800 milligrams) once a day, a half hour before the morning meal. Anything over 800 mg you should split into at least two doses, taking the second one a half hour before lunch.

Omega-3 Fatty Acids (Fish Oil)

Omega-3 fatty acids such as eicosapentaeoic acid (EPA) and docosahexaenoic acid (DHA) might have an impact on depression because these compounds are widespread in the brain. The evidence is not fully conclusive, but omega-3 supplements are an option. One to two grams of omega-3 fatty acids daily is the generally accepted dose for healthy individuals, but for patients with mental disorders, up to three grams has been shown to be safe and effective.

Supplements that contain amino acids have been found to reduce symptoms, possibly because they are converted to neurotransmitters in the brain that help alleviate depression. For example, serotonin is made using the amino acid tryptophan. Dietary supplements that contain tyrosine or phenylalanine, later converted into dopamine and norepinephrine, are also available.

You can get omega-3 from a variety of sources, both natural and supplemental. Naturally occurring omega-3 can be found in large amounts in beans (kidney, navy or soy), walnuts and flaxseeds. Fish, winter squash and olive oil also can act as a rich source of omega-3. Omega-3 supplements can usually be found as “fish oil” supplements. There has been no recommended standard doses of such supplements.

Vitamins and Minerals

Deficiencies of magnesium and vitmains B and D have been linked to depression. Research suggests that patients treated with 0.8mg of folic acid per day or 0.4mg of vitamin B12 per day will have reduced depression symptoms. Patients treated with 125 to 300mg of magnesium with each meal and at bedtime have shown a more rapid recovery from major depression.

Hoang and colleagues (2011) found that low vitamin D levels are associated with greater depressive symptoms — especially in people with a prior history of depression. Taking between 1,000 and 2,000 IU of vitamin D each day may help with keeping depression at bay.

Exercise for Depression

Although it’s mentioned all the time, people still seem often reluctant to try one of the easiest ways of helping to improve depressive symptoms — exercise. This is not surprising, however, since some of the symptoms of depression that many people experience include lethargy and a lack of motivation and energy. How can one exercise when one feels so unmotivated to do anything?

There’s no easy answer, but study after study has demonstrated the beneficial effects on mood of even occasional, moderate exercise. For instance, simply walking for 20 to 30 minutes per day, every other day, is sufficient to gain some mood-lifting benefits. If outdoor exercise isn’t possible, find a physical activity you can do at home or even consider joining a gym.

Other Herbs

There have, as of this writing, been only a small number of studies conducted on other possible herbal remedies for depression (Sarris et al., 2011). Therefore, based upon the evidence to date, none of these herbs are recommended as potential treatments for depression. In two randomized controlled clinical trials of C. sativus extract, beneficial effects were found in alleviating depression symptoms. These studies also noted that anxiety, tachycardia, nausea, dyspepsia and changes in appetite are possible side effects of this herb. Rhodiola (Rhodiola rosea) has had only a single study demonstrating its effectiveness in depression, and is therefore not recommended. Echium amoenum also has had only a single study that has examined its effectiveness in treating depression symptoms and is also not recommended.

Are Herbal Remedies Safe?

In general, yes, herbal remedies are safe when purchased from a major retail outlet and are a name brand product. Herbal remedies have come a long way in the past decade, as their formulations have become more standardized across manufacturers. Since herbal remedies are considered “food” by the U.S. government, they are not regulated in the same manner as prescription medication, so they may not adhere to the same stringent manufacturing requirements.

You should always carefully read the herbal packaging and ensure you understand the specific type and amount of the herb you’re intending to take. As pointed out in a recent medical journal article, contamination, mislabeling, and misidentification of herbs are important problems. In general, if you are taking an herbal remedy or thinking about it, discuss it with your physician. This is particularly important if you have several medical illnesses and are taking prescription medications.

References

Carpenter, DJ. (2011). St. John’s wort and S-adenosyl methionine as “natural” alternatives to conventional antidepressants in the era of the suicidality boxed warning: what is the evidence for clinically relevant benefit? Altern Med Review, 16, 17-39.

Hoang MT, Defina LF, Willis BL, Leonard DS, Weiner MF, Brown ES. (2011). Association between low serum 25-hydroxyvitamin d and depression in a large sample of healthy adults: the cooper center longitudinal study. Mayo Clin Proc., 86, 1050-5.

Linde K, Berner MM, Kriston L. (2008). St John’s wort for major depression. Cochrane Database of Systematic Reviews 2008, 4. DOI: 10.1002/14651858.CD000448.pub3.

Sarris J, Panossian A, Schweitzer I, Stough C, Scholey A. (2011). Herbal medicine for depression, anxiety and insomnia: A review of psychopharmacology and clinical evidence. Eur Neuropsychopharmacol.

Williams AL, Girard C, Jui D, Sabina A, Katz DL. (2005). S-adenosylmethionine (SAMe) as treatment for depression: a systematic review. Clin Invest Med., 28, 132-9.

Stress is different for all individuals, so there is no “cookie cutter” solution to manage it. You may have to experiment to find what works best for you. Finding healthy, positive ways to deal with stress will add to your overall well-being.

When dealing with stressful situations, consider the four points below. They may aid in decreasing the amount of stress and changing the way you view it.

1. Nothing and no one can “make” you feel anything. How you feel and the way you deal with a situation is a choice. I’m reminded of a counselor who would often state “no one can drive your car unless you give them the keys.” You cannot control others’ actions, but you can be responsible for your reactions.

   The serenity prayer states “God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things that I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.” When applied, this can be a great stress reliever. Look at the situation and ask yourself “is this something I can change?” If so, start exploring positive ways to change the situation.

   If the situation cannot be changed, such as an illness or the economy, accept it for what it is. Accepting does not mean giving up. By accepting the situation and finding ways you can cope with what cannot be changed, stress can be drastically reduced.

2. Exchange attitude for gratitude. Our attitude has a profound effect on how we deal with situations. Negative attitudes affect our physical, spiritual, and mental wellbeing.

   When in a particularly stressful situation, try exchanging attitude for gratitude. When you are running late for a meeting because you are stuck in traffic, change your attitude. Instead of being frustrated about the traffic, find some gratitude. Look around and think of all the things you can be thankful for. Sometimes you can find gratitude in the smallest things. You can be thankful for life, health, strength, friends, family, nature, etc. Focusing on gratitude can definitely change your attitude.

3. Relax, relax, relax. Amidst the hustle and bustle of everyday life, sometimes we forget to take care of ourselves. If we do not help ourselves, how can we effectively help others? Relaxation rejuvenates the body, mind, and spirit and leaves us better equipped to handle stressful situations when they come.

   Try to find something that you enjoy and do it every day. If you can set aside time for relaxation, do it. Try to set aside a designated, uninterrupted time and stick to it. Many people state they don’t have time to relax, but relaxation does not have to be time-consuming. Relaxation can include periodic 5-10 minute breaks of breathing exercises or watching your favorite show for 30 minutes. Relaxation can also include connecting with positive people.

4. Look at the big picture. Evaluate your stressful situation from a “big picture” point of view. Ask yourself “how important is this?” and “will this matter in the long run?” If the answer is no, it’s likely not worth your time and energy.

Stress does not have to be a part of life. Success stress management is all about learning how and when to take control. It’s important to remember that you control how stress affects you. You can control the stress or let stress control you.

“Don’t underestimate the value of Doing Nothing, of just going along, listening to all the things you can’t hear, and not bothering.”
- Pooh’s Little Instruction Book, inspired by A.A. Milne

Ignoring stress only ignites it. “Even when a couple tries to ignore stress, like static in the air, it is felt and absorbed.” If partners do talk about being stressed, they may not know what to do about it, Ford added.

Also, “stress is contagious.” Ford compared stress to a game of ping-pong, where the tension “bounces back and forth between partners.” Partners become both unable to relax and enjoy each other, she said. Stress “shows up in our actions, our behavior, and in both verbal and non-verbal communications,” so it’s bound to not only affect both partners but also their relationship. “Stressed-out couples quarrel and fight more often, withdraw from each other, feel disconnected, sad, frustrated, angry.” Ongoing unchecked stress can create bigger problems. “Long-term stress can turn to depression and isolation resulting in a frozen and distant relationship.”

Below, Ford shares her advice on spotting stress, comforting your partner and overcoming stress as a couple.

1. Recognize stress symptoms.

According to Ford, “Couples often become so accustomed to unchecked stress that they barely recognize and often overlook the destructive ramifications.” So how do you know when your partner (or you) is stressed? Ford listed these straightforward signs of stress:

• “one or both partners are snappy, cranky, withdrawn, moody, pouty, teary, ornery, angry, restless, hyper, agitated, overly excited.
• one or both partners are self-medicating with drugs, alcohol, food, etc.”

2. Approach your partner.

If you see signs of stress, ask your partner what’s going on in a kind and compassionate way. It could be as simple as: ““Are you having a difficult day, honey? Come sit by me and tell me all about it,” Ford said.

3. Listen.

“We want our partner to understand and when we are listened, we feel cared for,” Ford said. Keep in mind that listening is a skill, and one that few people actually do well. It’s the same with communicating with your partner. To learn more, read this piece on how partners can become active listeners and better speakers.

4. Comfort first.

Many partners forget to console their significant other and instead try to problem solve. But, as Ford said, “Comfort each other first, problem solve second.” That’s because your partner might be looking for stress relief rather than a nitty-gritty brainstorming session. Just hugging and gently touching your partner can provide that relief.

5. Get active together.

Participating in physical activities is one of the best ways to reduce stress. Plus, if you’re engaging in new activities, it can reignite your relationship. (Here’s more on boosting the passion in your relationship.)

6. Create a list of stress-reducing rituals.

Ford suggested that each partner write up a list of their “comforting rituals.” This can be anything from taking a bath to reading a book to working in the garage, she explained.

7. Check your stress temperature.

When both partners are stressed, comforting each other can get tricky. But Ford’s solution actually encourages couples to cope on their own. That’s because “You can’t comfort your partner until you have comforted yourself first. Calm yourself first then reach out in support of your partner.”

Ford suggested that each partner take what she calls a “stress temperature.” This simply means checking in with yourself to see where you fall on a 10-point scale (10 being “high stress” and 1 being “relaxed”). Share your temperature with each other. If it’s higher than a 4, each partner can engage in their comforting ritual, Ford said.

She added: “Support each other in recognizing and taking stress temps. When the temp is high, just like when a person is sick, he or she will need to do whatever it takes to feel better. Encourage your sweetheart to take care.”

8. Ask your partner what you can do.

An important way of supporting your loved one is to ask them flat-out how you can help. According to Ford, you might say: “Is there anything I can do to make your day go smoother?” If your partner isn’t sure, “notice what might be helpful and do that.” It might be anything from doing a few chores to giving them a relaxing back rub.

9. Keep posted on your partner’s days.

Knowing your partner’s daily agenda helps you spot potential stressors and be prepared to help. Do they have a big presentation or client interview coming up? Are they taking a test in their toughest class? Is their friend going through a difficult time? Is it time for their quarterly evaluation?

“Find out at least one thing that your partner will be doing and dealing with during the day.” Ford suggested asking your partner directly what’s on their plate: “Honey, what’s going on for you today?”

10. Consider if there’s anything else you can do.

Of course you can’t ease your partner’s stress completely. But you can pay attention to whether they’re happy and see how you can help. Ford suggested asking yourself: “Am I doing everything within my power to aid in my partner’s happiness?”

Unchecked stress can sabotage a relationship and lead to dissatisfaction and disconnection. But there are many ways you can take action to alleviate your own stress and support your partner.

You can learn more about Judy Ford at her website.

The whole idea of loving one’s body, however, is confusing. What does it even mean to love your body? One day, as I walked our dog around the block, it hit me. Loving our bodies is a lot like loving a dog:

1. Loving our bodies means placing respect, value and importance on physical needs for regular nourishment, fresh air, motion, and touch. Just as neglecting to value these needs is a complete rejection of a dog, it is also a complete rejection of our bodies.

2. Loving our bodies means investing time and energy into building a nonverbal, unique, and ever-evolving relationship. Like dogs, each of our bodies has its own particular needs and preferences that change over time, but does not have words to communicate those needs. As a result, figuring out what our bodies need takes ongoing relationship-building, with patience and attention.
3. Loving our bodies means recognizing that they live in the moment. This means that we have to be the ‘big’ brain for them – the ones who see the big picture and anticipate consequences of choices. Just as we would not let our dog eat two pounds of raw cookie dough, we sometimes must differentiate between our bodies’ momentary wants and its true needs, and may have to say no to some of our body’s desires.
4. Loving our bodies means exerting control through respect and cooperation. Neither dogs nor bodies just do what we tell them to. We need to have realistic expectations and then give them the support, consistency, and guidance to reach those expectations. When they do not ‘behave,’ it’s not that they are bad. It is that we haven’t properly supported them toward those behaviors, or that we have unrealistic expectations.
5. Loving our bodies means accepting that they are what they are. No matter how little a Great Dane eats, it will never be a Chihuahua. No matter how much exercise a Chihuahua gets, it will never be a Great Dane. We can either accept that our body is basically a certain shape and size, and become the healthiest of our ‘breed,’ or we can live in continual denial of reality and frustration with our bodies.
6. Loving our bodies means being patient with the time it takes to adjust to different routines and unfamiliar surroundings. Just as a dog is uneasy with change, so are our bodies – even if it’s a ‘good’ or fun change. During and after transitions, we must be supportive and gentle with our bodies.
7. Loving our bodies means accepting that all bodies, like all dogs, have physical impurities, imperfections, and messy parts. Our bodies are not perfect or pure. Basing our sense of self-worth on whether we are physically perfect or pure is as ridiculous as seeing our dog as bad for having an asymmetrical face, hip dysplasia, or bad breath in the morning. Similarly, trying to make our bodies pure or perfect through extremely restrictive diets or chronic use of plastic surgery is as misguided and potentially dangerous as it would be for a dog.
8. Loving our bodies means being trying our best not to use them as whipping posts for our anger about other things in our lives. Just as a bad day or feeling bad about ourselves may lead us to become annoyed with our dog (just for being a dog!), we also may focus our anger and frustration onto our bodies, blaming them for all that ails us. This is unfair and damaging.
9. Loving our bodies means getting back what we put in. Just as our dog repays us with loyalty and vitality when we care for its needs, our bodies reflect the care that we invest in them. The more we provide a balanced life for our bodies, the more balanced, calm, steady, and reliable our bodies will be for us.
10. Loving our bodies means doing what we can to care for them, while also recognizing that there are limits to our ability to protect them. Like a dog, our bodies get sick even when we try our best to take care of them. They also never live long enough, age in sudden jumps, and die before we are ready to let go.

Most of us were never taught anything about how to love our bodies. A lot of us are lost in a sea of media and social pressures to look a certain way and conflicting and unrealistic ‘expert’ advice about how to be healthy and disease-free. When you model and teach these basics of a healthy body relationship to your children, it can be an important part of helping them (and you!) to move toward sustainable health and wellbeing. And even if your teen rolls his or her eyes and continues to complain about fat thighs or narrow shoulders, or refuses to get off the couch and take a walk, be assured that you are doing what you can to embed the seeds of body respect into your child’s psyche, and that at some point those seeds will bloom.

Early Development of Food Preferences

Taste (sweet, sour, salty, bitter, savory) preferences have a strong innate component. Sweet, savory, and salty substances are innately preferred, whereas bitter and many sour substances are innately rejected. However, these innate tendencies can be modified by pre- and postnatal experiences. Components of flavor, detected by the olfactory system (responsible for smell), are strongly influenced by early exposure and learning beginning in utero and continuing during early milk (breast milk or formula) feedings. These early experiences set the stage for later food choices and are important in establishing life-long food habits.

The terms taste and flavor often are confused. Taste is determined by the gustatory system, located in the mouth. Flavor is determined by taste, smell and chemosensory irritation (detected by receptors in the skin throughout the head; and in particularly in regards to food receptors in the mouth and nose. Examples include the burn of hot peppers and the cooling effect of menthol).

Children should be fed nutritious foods (e.g., fruits and vegetables) from an early age. Health organizations worldwide recommend multiple servings of fruits and vegetables per day (between five-13), depending on one’s caloric requirement. Despite such recommendations, children are not eating enough fruits and vegetables, and in many cases they do not eat any.

A 2004 study investigating eating patterns of American children revealed that toddlers ate more fruits than vegetables and 1 in 4 did not even consume one vegetable on some days. They were more likely to be eating fatty foods and sweet-tasting snacks and beverages. Of the top five vegetables consumed by toddlers, none was a dark green vegetable, those that are usually most bitter. This can be partly explained by the innate tendency to dislike bitter.

Flavor Likes and Dislikes

The preference for specific flavors are determined by:

• Innate factors
• Environmental influences
• Learning
• Interactions among these.

To reiterate, taste preferences are generally strongly influenced by inborn (innate) factors. For example, sweet foods and beverages are highly preferred by plant-eating animals, probably because sweetness reflects the presence of caloric sugars, and may indicate non-toxicity. Natural preferences for sweet-tasting compounds change developmentally — infants and children generally have higher preferences than adults — and they can be drastically changed by experience.

Bitter-tasting substances are innately disliked, presumably because most bitter compounds are toxic. Plants have developed systems to protect themselves from being eaten, and plant-eating organisms have evolved sensory systems to avoid being poisoned. With consistent exposure and intake children may learn to like certain bitter foods, particularly some vegetables.

In contrast to taste preferences, flavor preferences detected by the sense of smell are generally highly affected with learning early in life, even in utero. The sensory environment, in which the fetus lives, changes as a reflection of the food choices of the mother as dietary flavors are transmitted via amniotic fluid. Experiences with such flavors lead to heightened preferences for these flavors shortly after birth and at weaning.

Prenatal experiences with food flavors, which are transmitted from the mother’s diet to amniotic fluid, lead to greater acceptance and enjoyment of these foods during weaning. In one study, infants whose mothers drank carrot juice during the last trimester of pregnancy enjoyed carrot-flavored cereals more than infants whose mothers did not drink carrot juice or eat carrots.

Influence of Breastfeeding

Exposure to a flavor in mothers’ milk influences the infants’ liking and acceptance of that flavor. This is seen when the flavor is encountered in a food.

In one study, researchers found that breast-fed infants were more accepting of peaches than formula-fed infants. It is likely that the increased acceptance of fruit could be due to more exposure to fruit flavors, due to their mothers eating more fruits during lactation. If mothers eat fruits and vegetables, breast-fed infants will be exposed to these dietary choices by experiencing the flavors in the mothers’ milk. This increased exposure to various flavors contributes to greater fruit and vegetable consumption in childhood.

Infants develop long-lasting dietary preferences very early in life. Pregnant and nursing women are encouraged to consume nutritious diets with a variety of flavors. Infants of women who do not breastfeed should be exposed to a variety of flavors, especially those associated with fruits and vegetables.