Anger Library


F E A T U R E D    A R T I C L E

Affair Recovery: Jealousy, Forgiveness and Building Trust

October 24th, 2014
What warrants a permanent breakup? What set of rules has to be breached and how badly, for two people, formerly attached to each other, to decide to part for good? The answer is different for every couple, but the only other emotional ...

Acceptance and Rewriting Your Life Story

Acceptance and Rewriting Your Life StoryWe grow up with certain beliefs about ourselves and our lives and expectations that things should work out a certain way. Then, we change, our lives change, and we start to realize that things aren't going as we had expected. This ...

What to Do When ‘I’m Sorry’ Doesn’t Work

What to Do When “I’m Sorry” Doesn’t WorkWe all mess up at times with our spouses, kids, and others important to us. Misunderstandings and empathic failures cannot be avoided in close relationships, but aren’t necessarily detrimental. In fact, the ongoing climate of relationships is typically affected ...

Marital Rape

crying woman upset googleAs an advice columnist, I receive too many letters like these (names have been changed): Anna is a woman in her 40s. She has been in a conflicted marriage for years. Her husband insists on morning sex, even though he knows it will make ...

Change How You Feel: Change How You Breathe

MeditationEmotions add flavor to life. Joy, love and contentment make living a pleasure. Anger and fear act as warning signals telling us when to protect ourselves. Most of all, emotions are the glue that binds us to family and friends. But those same emotions can be so ...

Two For: Memories of a Manic Father

Flickr Creative Commons / francois karmA shopping spree. Retail therapy. The high of a manic episode. Call it what you will, an out-of-control buying binge, especially one with a credit card in hand, is a very dangerous thing. My father was what we then called "manic-depressive.’" ...

Rethink How You Think: How to Create Lasting Change Today

BOOK REVIEW.
For a science-informed book on self-improvement, Rethink How You Think can be both illuminating and confounding. The primary reason is its splicing of science and religion: two camps perennially at odds. However, this is not the kind of book that has been somewhat in vogue the past few years, a pop-science look at religiosity versus ...

Boot Camp Therapy: Brief, Action-Oriented Clinical Approaches to Anxiety, Anger & Depression

BOOK REVIEW.
Ask people on Main Street America what comes to mind when they hear the word therapy. They may describe Freud, the classical analyst’s couch, with a free-associating patient spending years exploring the deepest recesses of early memories. However, they are just as likely — possibly more likely these days — to mention someone like Dr. ...

Frustration with Video Games Leads to Aggressive Behavior

Frustration with Video Games Leads to Aggressive Behavior The debate about whether the violence in video games perpetrates violence in real life is an ongoing one. Many parents, wanting to ensure the best for their children, remain uncertain about whether to allow their children to play ...

Mindful Anger: A Pathway to Emotional Freedom

BOOK REVIEW.
Have you ever been so angry that you were enraged? So upset that you were ready to scream and throw things? Felt your heart about to pound out of your chest at the wrong done to you? Or how about just annoyed? Something, or someone, just irritated you so much that you felt your head ...

8 Keys to Eliminating Passive-Aggressiveness

BOOK REVIEW.
If you find yourself making promises you are never able to keep, or agreeing to do things you really have no desire to do, passive-aggressiveness may have slowly insinuated itself into your life without your even being aware of it. We have all heard of the term passive-aggressiveness, but sometimes it’s not that easy to recognize ...

The Heart & Soul of Psychotherapy: A Transpersonal Approach through Theater Arts

BOOK REVIEW.
Can you act our your mother’s behaviors? How about pretending you’re that high school crush that broke your heart? Have you been called incompetent at work? Assume the role of Mr. Incompetence and let him speak for himself via your theater skills. Transpersonal drama therapy is a fresh approach to healing that offers transformation through ...

I Love You — Now Change

I Love You -- Now ChangeThis is not the article you might have thought it was. This is not the one about the fact that people don’t change and why you’d better learn to just accept everything about your partner. No. This is about healthy requests ...

February is Teen Dating Violence Awareness Month

February is Teen Dating Violence Awareness MonthAh, February: The month of love. Sadly, though, all love isn’t loving. February has been designated Teen Dating Violence Awareness Month to help educate teens how to recognize and stop dating abuse. If you are a teen or in your ...

Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder Following a Single Event

Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder Following a Single EventFollowing is an example of how post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) can develop after a single traumatic incident. Tony had a somewhat stable childhood. Though his parents divorced when he was 8, he, his mother and siblings stayed in the same house ...

Fire Your Shrink & Read This Book Instead

BOOK REVIEW.
Stop whining, repeating harmful behaviors, making excuses. Pick one that fits and get busy. That’s what our author would tell us. When I began David M. Klein’s Fire Your Shrink and Read This Book Instead, my reaction was, “Boy, is he angry.” Then I began to realize that Klein is just no-nonsense about making his points and ...

Fathers Reconnecting with Abandoned Kids

Fathers Reconnecting with Abandoned KidsJesse came to therapy with an important project in mind. Mine was not the first office he’d been to. He’d already been in a rehab program where he kicked a 10-year drug habit that had ruined his health, his marriage and his ...

Suicide Risk for Children of Northern Ireland’s ‘Troubles’

Suicide Risk for Children of Northern Ireland's 'Troubles'Recent findings are shedding light on the link between growing up in a conflict zone and risk of suicide. Over the past few decades, Northern Ireland has overtaken England, Scotland and Wales in suicide rates. To investigate the causes, Professor ...

Vacationing Together Can Put a Friendship at Risk

Vacationing Together Can Put a Friendship at RiskIt seemed like a good idea at the time. Mary and Del had been friends for years. Both of their husbands are involved in projects that make vacationing impossible. The kids are grown. Why not vacation ...

Summer Island

BOOK REVIEW.
"It was the impurity in her heart that made her successful. She was an ordinary woman who’d made extraordinary mistakes. She understood every nuance of need and loss." ~ Summer Island Given my love for women’s fiction, I’m enthusiastic when I discover a new writer’s collection. Happily, best-selling author Kristin Hannah captured my interest immediately with ...

What Are Personal Boundaries? How Do I Get Some?

What Are Personal Boundaries? How Do I Get Some?Love can’t exist without boundaries, even with your children. It’s easy to understand external boundaries as your bottom line. Think of rules and principles you live by when you say what you will or won’t do or ...

Finding Freedom in Forgiveness

Finding Freedom in ForgivenessForgiveness. It’s amazing how much power an 11-letter word holds. It has the power to release freedom and happiness. It has the power to allow us to move forward without ever having to focus on the past. When we ...

Hopping Roller Coasters: A Tale of Forgiveness and Healing

BOOK REVIEW.
  So many times we think we know where we’re headed; then we’re taking an unexpected turn. ~ Hopping Roller Coasters Rachel Pappas’s memoir, Hopping Roller Coasters, details the unpredictable story of a mother and daughter who must cope with their mood disorders, until they can reach a place of mutual understanding that gives way to ...