Before the Funeral…

• Offer to notify his family and friends about funeral arrangements
• House-sit to prevent burglaries during the funeral and visitations
• Help answering the phone and greeting visitors
• Keep a record of everyone who calls, visits or has been contacted
• Help coordinate the food and drink supply
• Offer to pick up friends and family at the airport. Arrange housing
• Offer to provide transportation for out-of-town visitors
• Help him keep the house cleaned and the dishes washed

After the Funeral…

• Prepare or provide dinner on a day that is mutually acceptable
• Do the step above every week for two to three months
• Offer to help with yard chores such as watering or pruning
• Feed and exercise the pets, if any
• Write notes offering encouragement and support
• Offer to drive or accompany him to the cemetery regularly
• Offer to house sit so he can get away or visit family out of town
• Make a weekly run to the grocery store, laundry, or cleaners
• Help with the Thank You notes and/or other correspondence
• Anticipate difficult periods such as anniversaries, birthdays, holidays, and the day of
  death
• Always mention the deceased by name and encourage reminiscing

Above all, just listening and your concern and presence will help.

    Last reviewed: By John M. Grohol, Psy.D. on 30 Jan 2013
    Published on PsychCentral.com. All rights reserved.