General

5 More Ways to Relax, Recharge — and Actually Make Time for It

As a culture, we don’t particularly like to slow down. Instead, we prefer to do most things on the go -- like shoving a bagel in our mouth as we run out of the house. We tend to view pausing and relaxing as inconvenient, as interruptions that only impede our productivity.

We think of self-care and rest as optional, said Kimberlee Bethany Bonura, Ph.D, a fitness and wellness educator and exercise scientist. We think “that if we are strong and motivated, we won’t need them.” The problem? “[I]f we don’t purposefully plan to relax and restore, we will do so in unproductive and unhealthy ways.”

We might yell at our kids. We might drink too much on the weekends. We might crash on the couch, channel-surfing for hours without actually feeling relaxed or enjoying what we’re watching. We might scroll through our social media feeds, only to feel cranky and disconnected, she said.
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Caregivers

Showing Up

“Show up.” We have all heard that term before. What does it mean to “show up”? There are several answers to this question.

When you buy a ticket to a cultural or sporting event, have an educational or career deadline or presentation, medical appointment or procedure, you know the date and time that you must be there. If you are late, arrive on the wrong date or location, or miss it altogether, the experience of the event has passed and is impossible to recreate. There typically is a negative consequence and a lesson learned.

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ADHD and ADD

How to Stop Stressing about Work & Finally Fall Asleep

If you’re like most people, you’ve been affected by stress-related sleep problems at some point, lying awake at night filled with anxiety about your career and the future.

Often everyday worries about impending deadlines and your to-do list give way to bigger, more stressful questioning, “Is this job really what I want to be doing with my life? What if I quit? Will I ever discover
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Brain and Behavior

4 Tips for Feeling Successful

"If I try to fail and succeed, which have I done?" - Anonymous
I use the above quote with my college students. I try to challenge them to look at life from a different perspective. In challenging our perspectives I am not merely playing semantics -- I firmly believe that words actually do hold meaning. Words have the power to affect our emotions. By challenging ourselves to look at our own definitions from a new perspective, we have the ability to change how we feel.

How I define success influences how I feel about myself. Many of us have culturally learned that success is defined by tangible goods and wealth. We hear expressions such as “If I have more things than someone else, I am successful” or “if I have a title or initials after my name, I am successful.” Does someone else's level of success negate my perceived level of success? In other words, is one's success defined in relation to another's accomplishments?

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Brain and Behavior

Compassion Fatigue in the Animal Welfare Community

Before becoming a psychotherapist, I had a career in animal welfare. I’ve worn both the boots and the sandals -- that’s jargon for working on the law enforcement side and the shelter side -- and I’ve seen my fair share of trauma.

Whether you’re a humane officer or a shelter volunteer, a vet tech or an animal rights activist, you have likely seen, heard about, or experienced things that most people can’t even begin to understand. Long-term exposure to abuse and neglect, euthanasia, and grief-stricken clients not only can affect your work productivity and satisfaction, but it can also wear on you mentally, physically, emotionally, and spiritually. If you feel like you care so much that it hurts, you may be struggling with compassion fatigue.
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Alternative and Nutritional Supplements

How the Media Affects Body Image

Body image is the way we perceive ourselves when we look in the mirror. We imagine ourselves to look and act a certain way, even though we may look and act differently to those around us.

Someone has a positive body image if he or she is attuned to the reality of his or her physical shape and size. This person fully understands his or her weight, the form of his or her body (from curves to wrinkles), and the way his or her body moves and functions.

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General

5 Simple Ways to Relax and Recharge

Many of us have a hard time relaxing. Maybe just the thought of taking a break actually stresses you. And that’s understandable. Because, as “a society we value being busy, so it can almost feel that we are doing something wrong by relaxing,” said Agnes Wainman, Ph.D, a clinical psychologist and self-proclaimed self-care activist in London, Ontario.

Christine Selby’s clients regularly tell her that relaxing is a waste of time because it means they’re not being productive. That’s when she asks them why they’d bother relaxing at all. They usually mention that relaxing feels good or helps them to wind down and destress. “My next question,” she added, “‘Is that not doing something?’”
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Anger

How to Neutralize Emotions

There has been a lot of discussion on all sides regarding “emotion processing” and how to successfully handle what are coined as “negative emotions.” In the Pixar film "Inside Out," a few different emotions are cleverly assigned individual personas so that children (and adults) can interact with them in a tangible way.

So what are we to do with negative emotions? Which ones are they? They are broadly defined as sadness, anger, bitterness, greed, hate, jealousy, fear or anything that makes one feel bad about themselves. So when an unsavory emotion surfaces and it starts to cause you guilt, what do you do with it?

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Anxiety and Panic

Mind Games

What does your morning shower feel like?

“Come again, Matt?”

Yes, what does your morning shower feel like?

“Why? Before work, I typically hop in and hop out. Can’t be late for boss -- he’s a real jerk. I rinse off in 10 minutes. Why? Are you planning on opening a Turkish bathhouse?” you snidely remark.

Not quite. But I am interested in washing away the incessant worry that pervades our daily lives. That humming cacophony drains us, greying life’s days.
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General

The Commitment Conundrum: What It Takes to Create Lasting Love

If there’s a single word that stirs up deep emotions, it’s “commitment.” While some desperately seek it, others run the other way. What is it about commitment that is so appealing to some, while striking fear into the hearts of others? Can we revision commitment in a way that frees us rather than traps us?

Those seeking commitment want to know that their partner is taking the relationship seriously. Research that forms the basis for Attachment Theory tells us that we’re wired with a longing for safety and security. When I need you, I want to know you’re there. It would seem that making a commitment to the relationship might assure mutual security. But sadly, divorce statistics reveal that however seriously we may commit ourselves to a partnership, they oftentimes don't work out

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Autism

Autism and the Gift of Friendship

When you have an autistic child, you try your hardest to socialize him. Autistic children have difficulty with being social and understanding even the simplest things such as carrying on a conversation.

For this reason, psychological and educational organizations have developed what’s known as the “social group.” This is a group activity where autistic kids can essentially “meet and greet” and work on things such as talking to each other, empathizing with each other and simply enjoying each other’s company.

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