On Tuesday, the news section of beautiful Psych Central had a story on child abuse being a cause of schizophrenia. This is not a new belief since many people with the disorder have lives filled with trauma starting in the very early years, …
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I am sixteen and a half. Ever since I was four or five, I was and am physically abused by my parents, EVERY DAY! It is constant, constantly verbal, and a lot of times physical. My mother, if she is mad at me (for example one time she took away my cell phone, that she does not pay for and that my grandparents do, the reason she took it away is because I went around the block and went right to the gym after that without telling her, which I forgot to do as an honest mistake, when I got home, she took it away, my grandparents, whom live right next door to me because I live in a duplex, where notified that she was going to do this because she told them, and I tried to explain it was an honest mistake, but she took it as lieing… she still took away my phone, which she has no right to take away… my grandmother went over and went right upstairs into my mothers room and told her that she was going to take the phone and hold onto it… my mother went on an outrage because she HATES my grandparents, or my father’s parents… she also thought that my nana would give or sneak the phone back to me… this was the worst… my mother then called my father over the phone while he was at work and started yelling at him that “We have to get the F*** outta here! You wouldn’t believe what your mother just did! And the fact that she had the balls to do it!” listining to this in the next room, I was shivering because I knew what was coming next, the beating I dreadfully waited for in those five slow minutes with her screaming over the phone. previously before that, after my grandmother left, my mother screamed for me to get my “ass in bed, NOW!!!!!!!”) My mother then came in the room, found me sitting on my bed, pulled my hair and dragged me onto the floor. She sat on me, smacked me on the face three times, and asked me who the f*** I thought I was. I said I didn’t know, and she smacked me again. I was crying, my fourteen year old brother told me to shut up from his room. He is mercyless… She glared at me, and twisted my hair even more, making my head sore from how hard she was pulling and twisting it in the different angles… This happened the night right before my sixteenth Birthday, november 29th, 2006. Another time she beat me was in August. She did kind of the same thing, except this beating lasted for about fifteen minutes. I was backed up in the corner of my room, and she was asking me who my mother is, I did not respond because in my mind a mother is not someone who would do this to their daughter…
she smacked me when I did not respond, and asked me again… I took the hits, and never responded. She asked me why I hated her so much, I told Her, crying, “Look at what you are doing to me, why are you doing it?” and she said, “This?” she kept smacking me in the face, and threw my head into the wall. She finally left me alone in my room. I atleast stayed up until twelve, making sure that she was not going to come back. Another time she wanted to see something on my body. this happened just recently… I did not want to show her, and said no and that it was my body. I kept refusing her demands to let her see the lump on my body, then she took my hair, and told me to pull my pants down, she did not let go until I did… my pants were down, she pulled me onto the ground to let her sit on me, and thus she sat. She tried to squeeze it, twisted it, and pinched it as hard as she physically could, I told her to stop because it hurt me… she told me to shut up. I tried to get up and I told her to get off of me. She again glared at me, pulled my hair and told me she’d beat the living F***ing shit out of me if I didn’t stop. she slammed my head into the wall and I had a lump the size of a marble on my head by the next day. I showed it to my friend, she felt it and the first thing that came out of her mouth was an “Oh my God!”… these are SOME examples of the hundreds of thousands of things that she did and does to me… Now, you tell me, is THIS abuse??
My heart goes out to you Liz, is there nowhere you can go to get away, like maybe live with your Grandparents? I had similar stuff go on in my childhood, so I can imagine what you’re going through..
Anyway, remember your mum is the scumbag, not you, and her abusing you is based on no justification other than she needs someone weaker to take out all her anger and insecurities about life on (pathetic really, you should feel sorry for her) so try not to end up blaming or hating yourself – living well is the best revenge
P.s there’s a Buddhist quote I like which I try to think of if I ever feel myself getting angry about what happened:
“Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned.”
Hi Liz! I totally agree with what Jamie said. Of course, this is ABUSE. I am a parent to a child with autism and it’s hard parenting any child let alone one with disability (that’s not your case). However, no parent should be doing this to a child. Remember a parent is there to protect a child, to nourish them, to educate them, not to torment them and abuse them either physically or emotionally. Anything from talking nasty, swearing at to smacking or bashing is abuse… Also, did you ever think of reporting this to the authorities? To DOCS (department of community services), for instance. Try and find some contacts in your area where you can go and talk to someone. Check this out: http://www.community.nsw.gov.au, or ring DOCS helpline: 132111. Hope all goes well for you, and be resilient and don’t settle for this situation, you don’t deserve it!
Hi Liz,
I am so sorry for what is happening to you, but you need to get out of that situation somehow, you need to talk to teachers, counslors, friend’s parents ANYONE!! I am 18 yrs. old and I know it’s kinda hard to talk to teachers and them about this but you need to. YOU DO NOT DESERVE THIS!!! Please find help, you deserve so much better!! Best of luck!!
Wow. I am so sorry Liz. That must have been horrendous. I can’t even imagine such abuse. You didn’t deserve it and I am sure you are a good person. If you are still in that situation, I pray you are able to get out and get counseling. I pray you can find someone to talk to that will listen and help you. I would help you and I don’t even know you. I am sure there is someone but if not, you have to go the police. As hard as it may be to turn in your parents, they are criminals for what they are doing. Someday you may be able to forgive them for yourself. Compassion is healing but it’s not time for that now. Right now is a time for you to feel SAFE! I would be happy to give you my e-mail if you wanted it. PLEASE find a SAFE place to go and take care LIZ!