Comments on
Best of Our Blogs: March 15, 2013

By Brandi-Ann Uyemura, M.A.
Associate Editor

I’ve often caught myself getting angry or upset with others, feeling imprisoned by their words, and haunted by their intentions. But rarely do I see my part in this dramatic play.

If you’ve ever caught yourself complaining about life, ranting about a co-worker or consumed by thoughts of a friend, you might also be unintentionally relinquishing your power to another.

I think we do it as a way to defend our seemingly broken selves. It’s an exercise of self-protection, an automatic response to a past injury and a way to right what’s wrong. But we don’t realize that unconscious reactions to the past end up recreating problems in the present. The only way to heal a hurt is to confront it, acknowledge its hold on our hearts and let go into it instead of hardening our hearts against it.

In The Book of Awakening, author Mark Nepo says:

“As human beings, our distrust builds a hardened resolve over our innocence, the way that silver tarnishes when exposed to air. Only the quiet, daily courage to be can let the air soften our hearts again.”

Food, sleep, and finances are all basic necessities we need to survive in this world. But knowing how to survive loss or lovingly accept a compliment are all important tools to live your life. How do you meet all issues with grace, courage and resilience? Our posts show us how accepting not resisting what is, will get you closer to health, balance and love.

{Flickr photo by petalouda62}

Join the Conversation!

Before posting, please read our blog moderation guidelines.

Post a Comment:


(Required, will be published)

(Required, but will not be published)

(Optional)

Recent Comments
  • The Skeezyks: Thank you for this insightful blog. As a follower of the Lojong teachings of Ani Pema Chodron, I found...
  • Shannon: Hello, I have anxiety and bipolar. I am on meds and they do help however my current boyfriend/fiancé has...
  • Seasoned Lady: Over 50 years of dealing with every kind of abuse here and now live peacefully alone far away from...
  • herpderp: seriously… your friend needs help, but not in dealing with insults. In the story as you describe,...
  • Lila: you are so right Macy, and the fact that they are always portrait as victims doesn’t help them at all.
Subscribe to Our Weekly Newsletter


Find a Therapist
Enter ZIP or postal code