Today I have the great pleasure of interviewing a hero of mine, the brilliant mind behind PsychCentral.com, the Internet’s largest and oldest mental health network … Dr. John Grohol. John is the CEO and founder of Psych Central …
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Site last updated: 21 May 2013
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Dr. Grohol offers some good advice here on personal fit which is tremendously important. Unfortunately, most people won’t be able to take this advice because they won’t know how to “look for” a therapist to begin with. Before they ever get to the point where they’re considering “fit,” they have a hundred questions about cost, setting, kinds of therapy, etc.
I’d like to recommend a little book called “How to Find a Good Therapist.” It’s short, cheap ($6 on Amazon), and walks you through the process step-by-step.
Yes, I wrote it. That notwithstanding, it really is the best and most current reference available for choosing a therapist.
This post is nice and theoretically on the mark, but, as someone practicing psychiatry in several different venues of mental health, less clinicians in the field value and encourage therapy these days as the pervasive mantra of “biochemical imbalance” has skewed even seasoned providers.
So, technically Dr Grohol is correct on most of his philosophies and perspectives, but it would be nice to read a post from someone who practices psychotherapy in community mental health, or an established private practice seeing more than 28 hours a week. A little candor and directness would probably reveal less is respected and sought.
Hell, I hope I am wrong!
Skillsnotpills
Hi Ben,
After seeing several therapists and not really clicking and not undestanding I needed to click with them, I finally found the near perfect therapist. Or should I say, she found me. She was assigned to me in hospital and after several sessions I followed her into private practice. I knew I’d found someone special because I clicked with her the minute I set eyes on her. Transference at first sight, I called it.
I’m just checking out your book on Amazon.
I find the relationship fascinating. I would use the word ‘unique’ rather than ‘strange’. Artificial would imply ingenuous. I just don’t view it that way. It is different from what we’re accustomed to and we can’t act in ways that we would in our relationships outside of the room, but it’s very real and felt. It’s both restrained and intimate at the same time.
I thinking finding a good therapist means finding one that can relate to your difficulties without suffering from them. I’m sure there are different dynamics in each client-therapist dyad. I was fortunate enough to find a therapist that worked very well for me. He was both caring and genuine. He had in himself exactly what I needed so we matched quite well. It was a healing relationship for me and not one I’ll ever forget.
I really appreciated this post, but I especially liked the piece about a good therapist knowing her limitations and not taking every client who walks through the door. I think that one of the best things supervisors can do for their therapists-in-training is to model appropriate consultation when dealing with clients and issues that are outside of your area of expertise. I think that when supervisors don’t model this, and instead, act as though they are able to manage every clinical issue and cultural difference, it sets up early therapists to believe they can do the same. It is a disservice to therapists in training, but ultimately, it’s worse for the clients who may not know better.
I made up this “phone interview” to do before I meet w/a therapist as I saw one about 5 times when she told me she didn’t believe in psych meds as they “blunt your emotions.” Here I am w/a dx of bipolar 1 & on meds & the meds have helped me so much. Before meds I couldn’t even participate in therapy as I just cried all the time. My emotions need to be “blunted” for me to get any benefit from therapy as I had been in therapy off & on for about 30 yrs. w/it not helping much.
So I felt like I had wasted a lot of my time (& money) when I disagreed w/the basic premise of medication. My pdoc couldn’t believe the therapist would announce that opinion to me, either.
But I did have a relapse despite being medication compliant due to my sleeping getting way off track & spending mos. in hypo mania before an overdose. Phone interview below:
Thank you for returning my call. I’ve made some notes to hopefully keep this as brief as possible. I’d like to give you a short synopsis of my situation & ask you a few questions about your methodology before I schedule an intake & give you the opportunity to decline to work with me, as well.
I’ve seen some therapists that have opinions or methods that I don’t agree with so I would like to avoid doing an intake appt. if we don’t share some important ideas about treatment.
I was dxed w/bipolar 1 about 8 years ago. I’m 53 & was misdiagnosed w/unipolar depression for many years. I’ve had several suicide attempts with my first at the age of 15. About a year and a half ago I ODed, but it wasn’t really a suicide attempt but trying to get rid of the intense emotional pain I was feeling. I ended up in the ER & my meds provider has strongly rec’d therapy. I had a chaotic childhood due to my mother having bipolar & committing suicide & having an alcoholic father.
Do you have much experience working w/clients who have been dxed w/bipolar?
What method of therapy would you use for a person like me?
What is your opinion of psychiatric drugs?
Eventually, I’d like to bring my husband into the therapy sessions for us to work on our relationship & communication & understanding of my illness. Do you have training in marital therapy & would you be willing to see me alone until I feel comfortable adding my husband to the sessions?
What are your credentials?
How long do you allow for the initial intake & what is the cost?
How long is a typical appt. & what is the cost?
From what I understand my insurance co. will require a treatment plan after my first visit to authorize 5 more visits. Then another treatment plan will need to be filled out by you to get authorization for more sessions after every 6 sessions.
Is this a process you are familiar with & would be willing to do?
I HAVE found a wonderful therapist. She is the same therapist who leads the DBT group I attend.
agreed with Dr. John Grohol that its difficult to find a therapist as the need differ from one patient to other. but the whole psychology lies at this point that no law can be applied to all humans. so therapist also know this, and respond to every single patient with different techniques and that’s called mastery.
Nowadays it is not very difficult how to find a therapist. A professional who works very well with one individual may not be a good choice for another person. It is important to find a good fit between you and your therapist.