It’s supposed to be the most exciting time of your life… And everyone is telling you how lucky you are to have a beautiful baby, but all you can do is cry. …
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I didn’t have postpartum depression. I had depression pre-pregnancy, during pregnancy, and after pregnancy. It was just ongoing depression that happened to have a pregnancy in the middle of it. But in a way that was better than postpartum depression, because I had treatment the whole time. Yes, I took an antidepressant while I was pregnant and nursing. I added a second one during baby’s first month, when I came closer to a bona fide suicide attempt than I ever have before or since. I had counseling throughout, too. I shudder to think what happens to postpartum moms who are blindsided by a mood disorder (such an innocuous euphemism for hell) without treatment resources in place.
Great article. I was a public health nurse for 15 years and supported many new moms during this time. A huge part of PPD is knowing you are not alone and there is help out there. Even postpartum blues (a milder form of PPD) which I suffered from can be scary when you are someone who usually has their act together. I cried a lot, got anxious and felt totally overwhelmed by my new baby. I have started a blog on helping people get connected with the mind chatter that goes on in our heads and keeps us stuck. This will be progressing to an online community to give people practical “in the moment” tools to help them destress. I would love to see you there. Take care all.
I didn’t have postpartum depression. I had depression pre-pregnancy, during pregnancy, and after pregnancy. It was just ongoing depression that happened to have a pregnancy in the middle of it. But in a way that was better than postpartum depression, because I had treatment the whole time. Yes, I took an antidepressant while I was pregnant and nursing.I added a second one during baby’s first month, when I came closer to a bona fide suicide attempt than I ever have before or since. I had counseling throughout, too. I shudder to think what happens to postpartum moms who are blindsided by a mood disorder (such an innocuous euphemism for hell) without treatment resources in place.
I am a woman in my 20s who would like to have children someday, but reading articles like this all the time makes me absolutely terrified to ever do so. Quotes like “Motherhood and depression are two countries with a long common border” always make me think, “Okay, since clearly, motherhood is AWFUL, and turns happy, well-adjusted people into suicidal shells, why would ANYONE ever want to do it?” My mother insists that my babyhood and childhood were the most blissful and thrilling time of her life, but honestly, every second or third article on New York Times and WebMD seems to be about how much it sucks. Why do we continue to reproduce? I like my life now; I have no desire to end up devastated and in a psychiatric hospital.
To the last reader. Although many articles including this one have made motherhood sound horrible to you, I can say looking at my 2 beautiful children is the most incredible feeling and makes ALL bad things that go with birth completely forgetable. Having children doesn’t mean you will end up devastated, I did suffer from depression for both my kids and feel that this article and other sites are a great support to make us realize we are not alone and truly crazy!
Being a parent is a work in progress. The more sympathy, support, and stability you have in your life when you have a child/children, the better you will do, but, you won’t know how well you have done until you kids have grown and have kids of their own. And, child raising is a two parent experience, and I do not give a damn who wishes to argue otherwise. Single parenting issues are probably the number one reason adult women come into my office for treatment; not the only one, but a major reason for distress.
Guys, if you are going to be intimate with a woman and risk getting her pregnant, either use birth control or prepare to be a father and BE ONE!
Just an opinion but one of experience from my travels as a psychiatrist.
I hope I would give my wife more love and support when she had bady born.This will be progressing to an online community to give people practical “in the moment” tools to help them destress. I would love to see you there. Take care all.
I have experienced some of these symptoms of PPD, however reading this article has actually made me feel BETTER about how I’ve handled being a new mother. My heart goes out to those people like PP who have dealt with depression during and throughout their pregnancies. This just makes me feel as though it could be worse for me and to appreciate the strength I HAVE had thusfar. Great article, thank you.
This article was very helpful to me, however, it’s not always so easy to tackle step 5…I had my second child when my first one was only 15 months old and I was fortunate to befriend my next door neighbor, a new mom as well. However, I lived in a tiny apartment and the idea of posting up flyers for strangers and have them cram into my home wouldn’t have ever worked. For some of us, it’s tough to find 1 decent “safe” person, let alone 5 or 6. Kudos to you that you were able to start up a group of your own, and I’m sorry you had to go through such a deep depression. Best to you!
I am suffering from depression. I just had my baby 3 weeks ago. It seems like my hubby is just too pushy at times…and it feels like he is not in love with me anymore. Its all the baby and just says things off sometimes. i feel like a baby factory because all the attention is on my baby…which i dun mind, but it really hurts when my hubby and everyone around me tells me what to do…as though i am not the mum of my child. I tried breast feeding and failed as she does not latch on and we have chosen formula…but he still forces me to breast feed and wants to call a lactation consultant and so on. I just feel that i am not important anymore…and its getting worse because as i tried to speak to him…rather than making me feel good…he just told me to think about it and left for work. i have no frens here and no one to talk to…i am crying and everyone makes me feel like its not my baby…