We all face difficult times at some point in our lives. Sometimes, adversity comes in waves, with one hardship or misfortune following another. These times can change our lives and challenge our beliefs about the world.
What makes for adversity is different for each person. For example, while one person might see the loss of a job as an opportunity, many (if not most) would find it stressful.
These life-changing situations often happen when we experience a death, job loss, serious illness or other traumatic events.
How you act when faced with setbacks and hardships can be as unique as you are. But according to the American Psychological Association (APA), what you have in common with anyone else facing adversity is “a flood of strong emotions and a sense of uncertainty.”
So how do we overcome adversity?
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I think these are very useful suggestions for people to cope with adversity. I would just add a little warning to the suggestion about using your strengths. There has been a lot of research tht suggest that people can derail when they over use their strengths during adversity. For example, attention to detail can become perfectionist, confidence can become arrogance, and using yoru charm can become manipulation, etc. So yes, great to draw on your strengths when facing adversity and then take care not to overuse them.
Helpful insights, Acceptance is so often what keeps people stuck in those feelings associated with the original adversity. When we say to ourselves repeatedly that something “should” not have happened we unwittingly practice an unrealistic thought that entrenches extreme negative emotions. Along with the should there are other thoughts that help to keep the pain alive such as ‘this is awful’ and ‘I can’t stand this’ or I am or he or she is a ‘failure’. All these are what Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy does such a good job at helping people move on from tough times.
I agree entirely about “focusing on building strong relationships” but find this is difficult in today’s competitive world. I know plenty of people who only seem to want ‘friends’ so they can compete with, put down and otherwise abuse them (usually they’re in denial about this). Then there’s groups who avoid picking on each other by competing with some other group(s), perhaps healthier to belong to but still more about hate than love.
Aside from the fact that there are probably a host skills and attitudes one can learn in building healthy relationships, such as sensitivity to others needs & being proactive, I also believe relationships with plants and animals are often overlooked in our industrial society. I love & care for my plants and animals & they make me feel good, and give me food to boot! Not a complete substitute for real friends but they can help a lot & in my experience a lot easier to find!
Cheers
How one acts and reacts about adversity is a decision and a choice. A supportive, caring family and friends definitely will be helpful. Sometimes it is more helpful to decathect from those that seem to bring one down, even if it is painful. What is more helpful from a Christian perspective is to accept the fact that God is in control and we have to rely on Him. When one realizes that God through His divine grace and mercy will work things out to those who believe, then one can have inner peace and joy.