It’s only in recent years that ADHD is becoming better understood in girls and women. But we still have a long way to go, according to Terry Matlen, ACSW, a psychotherapist and coach who specializes in ADHD. She noted that we need to improve how we identify girls with ADHD, evaluate them and administer treatment.
In fact, the biggest myth about ADHD and girls is that girls don’t have the disorder in the first place. However, ADHD affects both girls and boys at roughly the same rate, said Stephanie Sarkis, Ph.D, a psychotherapist and author of several books on ADHD, including Making the Grade with ADD and Adult ADD: A Guide for the Newly Diagnosed.
Boys with ADHD tend to have a more obvious and classic presentation. They typically exhibit hyperactivity and impulsivity. In short, they stand out more.
Girls, however, are harder to spot because they internalize their symptoms and usually don’t exhibit behavioral problems at school, said Matlen, also author of Survival Tips for Women with AD/HD.
Before posting, please read our blog moderation guidelines. The comments below begin with the oldest comments first. Click on the last comments page to jump to the most recent comments.
Before posting, please read our blog moderation guidelines.
Post a Comment:
Copyright © 1995-2013 Psych Central. All rights reserved.
Site last updated: 24 May 2013
|
As a girl with ADHD, before it had a name…. I was the chatty cathy, messy type- with big ideas and big dreams. Humor and charm got me through the hurdles and challenges my symptoms all too often, unwittingly resulted in-
I learned how to get good grades, without learning- a skill that carried me all the way through law school-
Here are two poems about the fallout of an education system that was often too focused on teaching subjects, to really see how a seemingly bright young girl was struggling and in need of help rather than judgement….
From inside ADHD…
Before it had a name by Lori Polachek
To my teacher(s),
You had both hands on the wheel
Your eyes were out to sea
The throttle ably set
at a rather dizzying speed
I was out there in the water
fingers waving frantically
kids were doubled over laughing
I could barely, barely breathe
I had drifted over board
staring out to clear my head
from the many, many thoughts
drowning, drowning what you’d said
My mind it moved so quickly
like a magnet I was drawn-
with nothing, nothing to grab hold of
you droned on, and on, and on
If you had only seen me
had tossed a caring smile
I could have pulled myself back in
I could have joined you for a while
You’d have stood a little closer
If my eyes had failed to see
You’d have offered me a hand
If my legs were tired or weak
But my mind it moved so swiftly
as if filled with helium
and you didn’t seem to notice
didn’t help to reel me in
Humor was my birdcall
You were far, far from amused
It helped me, helped me find you
But would blow your short, short fuse
You roared “Quiet in the classroom”!
You had lessons to teach-
How many of us, really
Did you really care to reach?
Thanks for this important post and for bringing light to the struggles of girls with ADHD, which still today is all too often misunderstood
The poem below is another expression of some of the internal, often invisible and misunderstood struggle…and some of the creative, resilient efforts to compensate…to tow the line and fit in….at unfortunate personal cost…
Lines By Lori Polachek
Cutting one’s own offspring’s
umbilical cord is a challenge,
even for someone as powerful
as the Almighty. Three to six
years of study are required
to notarize a deed of sale or audit
debits and credits. I couldn’t find
a college with even a one-year Major
in Motherhood. Being a middle child,
I settled for Commerce-ever determined
to close in on my brother’s two-year
head start in life. He wasn’t threatened
by me, any more than Coke is by Pepsi.
That’s how it is when you’re “the real thing”-
Too busy selling bottles, and cans-
to worry about taste tests.
Pepsi could learn a thing or two.
We all could.
Freedom is the smelly, rotten
cheese promised in grade school
for jumping through mind-numbing
Pavlovian hoops meant to remold
God’s image into that of a compliant
bureaucrat. Independent thinking
was a learning disability, I was plagued with.
I chased my curiosity like string on a ball of yarn-
stretching across restricted lines-
nobody noticed as long as I towed the line-
which I could not always do.
Jokes flew off my tongue-
like a skunk’s spray-
an immune response to boredom.
Medication is used today,
like trade tariffs,
leveling competition,
for students attention.
Freedom is the black hole
we step into upon liberation
from childhood- armed with a torn map
to the life we should want, but don’t.
Determined to be selected, naturally
I peed on sticks with abandon
embracing each faint pair of lines
in the bosom of its own possibility.
I was diagnosed with dyslexia when I was attending college for the 2nd time in 1995. I was 39yrs old then and the college special education coordinator told me at that time, I had another learning disability that I had covered over for so long that it was very well hidden. When I came home that evening and shared the news with my then husband, he said I had no dyslexia or any other disorder. I said it would explain why I could not pass pre-algebra(I had failed the course 5x). He said I just needed to try harder or go back to work, we needed the money. I went back to work. In 2008, while attending therapy while I was my Mother’s care giver, I was given a test by my therapist for ADHD. She said the average score for assessment was 35, I scored 75 and thought I was such a mess. Today I take medication and try to work on getting more attuned to getting a handle on my disorder. In a way, I am grateful for having ADHD because I like to learn things. Anything and everything. I am not limited by just one field of study either, although science fields intrigue me most. It is a shame that I had to be 56yrs old to realize this but this gig is long way from over.
Like your poems,Lori.
I did not get diagnosed until 41(found out I should have been @ 27- I went back to same clinic.)
Another interesting and useful article… I was into retirement before anyone ( and I) suspected some ADD — I used to think that i had certain issues because first, I had been the kid in a dysfunctional family who was always on alert for my father’s mood changes ( the undercover perfectionist0 and the feeling of threat from authority figures stayed with me; and that I was just too lazy to stick to routines work, or had low esteem which kept me from making decisions quickly enough. I do remeber one HS teacher who remarked that I seemed to be someone who went all out on A subject forgetting about everything else, then might switch to B and so on. I was bright so was able to make it through college despite the constant procrastination, and unhappiness for various reasons. At work, as paperwork requirements kept increasing, I stayed later and went in on Saturdays to be able to do stuff I couldn’t concentrate on when in the midst of distractions (and in the crunch would hyper-concentrate for hours on one issue that needed to be done yesterday). The job I was in had many emergencies – perfect because it gives the constant adrenalin necessary to fix your focus for a bit, then move to another crisis. I was great at handling crises! But it was all exhausting. In retirement I found I had an extreme problem with structure and routine, and finally have sought help – not for depression, which I had readily acknowledged for years but for ADD… The bizarre thing is that when I meantioned this to a couple of of folks I had worked with – they laughed – they couldn’t believe that I didn’t realize I was ADD because they had been sure of it! AT any rate, the issue is – girls who may seem dreamy or may not finish work may need help with this, both in how to structure themselves to handle multiple demands and possibly with meds. But I wouldn’t do the medications without coaching as well, because one’s maladoptive coping mechanisms have to be changed – to make life easier.
I have read the article and all of your comments with interest. My middle son is ADD (with NO H!) and was not diagnosed until the very end of high school.
I am disorganized – but work in the arts. I have wondered if I was ADD. Others have said there is no way – because I finished college, got a job, successfully keep my job. Still, I wonder….
I read “Driven to Distraction”. I would rather create than clean up. I have ideas for projects, but don’t always get them done in time. I’d rather do a FUN project than something that NEEDS to be taken care of (like health insurance stuff).
Is there a test? Who do I talk to?
Hi,
I am really confused about these medications for this condition. I fell that part of the talent for people with ADD is thinking outside the box and being a creative thinker. Education to day doesn’t really allow for any level of hyperactivity and has brought in stress of homework and therefor focus at a younger age. My daughter has ADD and if you read the side effects of Adderal, its hard to believe that children are being given this drug. I am sure I am ADD and could benefit but I really like the way my brain can skip and think in different directions. maybe hard for others but the creative side outweighs it all. I have to say I really think that education has become more tight, stressful and competitive to the expense of happiness and letting individuals be individuals. There is way too much pressure on kids to focus and get an A….not sure what is right…
Well this is a surprise, it seems that not only do I have this problem and possibly others, my wife also has the problem in her family, so where does that leave our daughter, at sixty years of age I am far from throwing in the towel, but my main concern is my little one, she is now 17, does anyone know a good doctor on the Central Coast we could talk to?