On Valentines Day most couples make fancy dinner reservations, buy lovey-dovey cards and express their appreciation for each other. But what happens on February 15th? One day a year doesn’t make a romantic relationship.
Plus, there are plenty of ways to keep the passion alive all year, which helps to genuinely strengthen your relationship. Below, three experts share their tips for year-round romance.
1. Show your appreciation every day. “From morning until night, couples have the opportunity to offer words of affirmation, appreciation and adoration to one another as well as the chance to offer nonverbal cues as well,” according to psychotherapist Jeffrey Sumber, MA. Nonverbal cues are anything from a wink to a kiss to a smile. Every day Sumber asks himself a question that’s valuable for everyone to ponder: What can I do to celebrate my partner today?
2. Surprise your partner. Small surprises also make the everyday special, according to Barton Goldsmith, Ph.D., a psychotherapist and author of Emotional Fitness for Couples. He suggested leaving a love note on the fridge, in the shower or in your partner’s pocket; leaving a loving or sexy voicemail; or sending a card to work. Sumber recommended breakfast in bed, flowers or even a singing telegram at work.
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Nicely written!
Who could argue with any of these? They’re all on target.
I might, though, move the “Be Intimate” from last on the list toward the top. For men, especially, physical intimacy is of the same priority as talking might be for many women. I’d quantify it, even. If a couple should “talk for 30 minutes” every day? Perhaps they ought to have the same amount of non-verbal intimate connection time,no? Who is to say that one is more important than the other?
Again, excellent job.
Thanks for sharing! I find all of these helpful when assisting couples in connecting.
Through my work with couples I have found that the simple things we can do to show affection are often lost in long-term relationships. I would also like to add that at times partners need to ask for what they want. Often I see partners disappointed about expectations regarding desire for affection. Yet partners are not expressing these desires to his or her partner. If we can ask we may get what we want.
Thank you for your words of wisdom.