I sometimes wonder if our focus on “doing things right” is what causes us more pain, anguish and difficulty than anything else in life. It’s almost as if those red marks on our graded assignments as kids stay with us when we become adults.

In fact, our fear of impending negative feedback often grows as we grow older. We hold our vulnerabilities even closer, wrapping them up carefully like we would a glass vase or a precious piece of china. We’re fearful of sharing our feelings. We hold back our laughter, forgetting that as kids we let it all out from our bellies to our mouths. And to shield our pain, instead of crying, confronting or expressing ourselves, we avoid loved ones when they’ve hurt us.

Yet, in order to fully live, to feel completely alive, we must feel free to express and experience all sides of ourselves.

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