Imagine you divided everyone in the world into two psychological groups. You put all the optimists on one side and all the pessimists on the other (let’s leave the realists aside for now).
Amongst the optimists the conversation would all be about fantastic plans for the future and how things can only get better.
Meanwhile the pessimists are having what might seem to the optimists like a depressing discussion. Far from working out how to make their dreams come true, they’re worrying about all the things that might go wrong. They’re worried that even the things they have will be taken away from them by some cruel twist of fate.
To the optimists, the pessimists seem too down on everything, always just a little too keen to pour cold water on any exciting plans.
To the pessimists, though, the optimists are out of touch with reality. Can’t they see what a nasty, cruel and accident-prone world we live in? They are deluding themselves!
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Pessimism can be seen as a byproduct of “realism” but in all truth, excessive pessimism just creates a bleak outlook on life. Optimism is beneficial for
enjoyment and anticipation of things to come, but can also be a let down if things don’t work out.
It’s important to really find a healthy balance between the two and manage these two conflicting natures properly.
I am a born optimist. Good thing, or I might be drooling in a corner!
“Drooling in a corner”? Maybe YOU would be, but I find that pessimists are usually the ones who pick up after hard times or disasters and forge on, while the optimists, stunned and despairing, are the ones who collapse and give up!
Wait what? That doesn’t even make sense..
Pessimists are less likely to pick up after hard times than an optimist.. A pessimist would say “See, I knew this was [bleep]y, why bother.. while an optimist would say “Well, this was [bleep]y, but let’s make the best of it!”. An optimist doesn’t give up because there is always positive energy to explore.
As you can see I am an optimist, and damn proud of it. I divorced a pessimist and damn proud of that too;) BUT I did learn a lot from him, and I am grateful. That’s what you call “optimism”. Did he learn anything from me? He’ll never admit it!!
“It’s different strokes for different folks.” Well said!
I’d like to think of them as different mechanisms which are suited for different situations. All of us do have our own ups and downs in life.
I’m always told I’m “such a pessimist” and then how “unhappy [I} must be, which is totally untrue. I agree with the above article that pessimism is often an outgrowth of realism. I also find that those I know who always deny reality and try to be “optimists” all the time, are usually the most miserable and devastated by negative events. I think a balance is important and that optimism must never be “blind”!
Pessimist is a well informed optimist.
And just because i don’t think life is a valley of giggles, rainbows and unicorns does not mean I am not happy.
Pessimism has less to do with being well informed, more to do with overall outlook on given information. Seeing the glass as half full isn’t the same as being blind to it’s existence in the first place – that is called ignorance, not optimism.
Stop comparing pessimism with emo kids. Being a pessimist doesn’t make you a leftover; I’m one and I can surely tell you that I prefer not being surprised by every nasty thing that happens and having deeper conversations than how “oh so perfect is this world”. So keep your optimistic anti-pessimism talk at home and mind your own closet. I have optimist friends and I wouldn’t dump my spouse for being an optimist AND feel proud about it. LOL, that’s sick! See? I bet that he isn’t surprised of you dumping him…
Haha, you guys are funny. I’ve been on both sides of the fence, it’s all just perspective. Everything about these emotions, these “sides” are perspectives, and by choosing to feel one way or another decides how that situation will make you feel. And because you can always shift your thinking from one to the other in almost any situation, you can always choose how to react or feel, given that you know how to.
I’m now a content optimist, in most of my daily life, and I regret nothing.
yea! This is great to think. What came to my mind is that I am always in a conflict. Between “opti” and “pesi” and that make understand almost all posibility of what is going to happen and feeling happy of living in “present” . A clear balance of opti & pesi.
Pessimism may help those “naturally” inclined to it cope and perform, at least in the short term. But would it not be far better to enjoy life as it is, which optimists seem to do more than pessimists? And doesn’t optimism make you more confident and attractive and influential to others? Whether going along with one’s established pessimism is effective would seem to depend on the situation. You many perform better on a technical challenge with that pessimism, but it’ll almost surely be self-fulfilling if you’re in sales or marketing—or trying to find a date.
What’s an optimist? – He’s a loser that thinks he’s a successful person
What’s a pessimist? – He’s a successful person that thinks he’s a loser
That’s quite an subjective view you have there, I would rather leave out the subjective ‘succesful’ and ‘loser’ part and say:
What’s an optimist? Someone who enjoys what he has and/or tries to get more out of his/her life.
What’s a pessimist? Someone who doesn’t enjoy his/her life to the fullest and tries less to achieve that.
Frankly I’m a pessimist and I couldn’t care less. The thing a lot of people don’t realize is that I am a pessimist for a reason. I’ve changed 5 different schools in less than 10 years, each and every one of my very few friends has backstabbed me, I am made fun of because I have a disease that doesn’t allow me to gain weight, my parents emotionally abuse me continuously and frankly every single optimist I’ve met was more fragile than a half a millimeter thick piece of weak glass. The optimists I’ve met expect way too damn much out of life and (I’ve seen this live) when a single bad thing happens they break down and cry (really, 9/10 of the optimists I’ve met broke down and cried), then there are all the pessimists who have to bother themselves with picking up the life-is-perfect-people’s broken hearts. I fail, okay, life sucks, move on, my former friend (optimist) fails, she makes everyone suffer because she is so vulnerable. She literally went slack and stunned, cried and complained, screamed and then went absolutely numb. She refused to do anything, brain-dead per se. I actually could tell you all the stories, but that would involve writing crying and 7 months in much too many sentences.
and for those of you saying I will get nothing out of life, read this and stare. In all of my 5 schools my average (for the entire school year) was never less than 95%, I was voted most outgoing, not most positive though. I finish each and every year (above grade 1) with honors, I join clubs, yes I’m a loner. I’ve gone snorkeling and scuba-diving, seen the pyramids, went (indoor) skydiving. I’ve been rock-climbing and river rafting. Really I’ve done a lot, I haven’t enjoyed any of it seeing as none of it was exciting, but I’ve done it. Now, if you want to say I’m going nowhere in life just swallow your words. I’m just a pessimist because life pretty much sucks, and I know it. Pessimism doesn’t mean you won’t be successful, and I bet that an optimist came up with that idea.
Hey I like your attitude, thanks for sharing, I thought I was crazy with my overall negative attitude towards life. Also done a lot of stuff like travelling and not looking forward to more. Cheers
Just pointing out that there’s a VAST difference between pessimism and whiny-pity-me-ism, which many, and I can’t express the “MANY” part enough, just don’t seem to understand. If you’re living life legitimately as a pessimist, then you’ll still have a good appreciation and love for yourself, but you won’t be deluded by the world of the ignorant and will see things toned down, in comparison to the optimist who wants to see the goodness in every scenario, generally. There are two sides to the extreme optimist and pessimist, but it’s good to just be in the middle, like usual.
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Wow, I can’t believe how many pessimist think that optimist are ignorant, oblivious fools. Optimist look for a light at the end of the tunnel and are happy when it’s found and if it were closed would try to find a way out and hope for the best were as pessimist assume that the tunnel has caved in. though they may look and find it open the journey to geting there was bleek and daunting and the fact that it’s open is a freak thing and that finally one good thing happened and will likely never happen again.
I think optimist are the saddest happy people. They are alway happy while being optimistic, then crying because it didn’t go their way, as they expected.
As a pessimist (or realist) I am always happy: Either everything happened as I expected, or I’m pleasantly surprised. Win/Win!
whatever helps you sleep at night
Optimism is the resulting cure for pessimism.
People who are optimists have likely been faced with becoming pessimists over a relative course of negatives associated with their world and body of experiences.
The difference is in the bias and gravity thereof.
If a pessimist does not contain associative levels of optimism then the positives are not realized, only shades of external awareness. The optimist already has pessimisms which motivate the optimisms.