Dan Fields, freelance health writer and former editor in chief of Dr. Andrew Weil’s Self-Healing newsletter, recently sent me a link to his piece for a cool new online publication called “The Good Men Project Magazine.” I was especially intrigued by his exploration of midlife suicide and why the rate is highest among any age group. You can get to his fascinating piece by following this link. I have excerpted a few paragraphs below:
In 2007 (the latest year for which statistics are available), people aged forty-five to fifty-four had the highest suicide rate of any age group: 17.7 per 100,000. (The national average was 11.5 per 100,000.) And the rate for fifty-five to sixty-four-year-olds showed the greatest increase from the previous year.
Researchers don’t yet know why midlifers are becoming more vulnerable to suicide, especially since studies have found that middle age is generally the happiest time of life for most Americans. As a forty-five-year-old white guy, I was curious to know what makes my demographic group so self-destructive. After talking with experts, here’s what I learned…
Before posting, please read our blog moderation guidelines. The comments below begin with the oldest comments first. Click on the last comments page to jump to the most recent comments.
Before posting, please read our blog moderation guidelines.
Post a Comment:
Copyright © 1995-2013 Psych Central. All rights reserved.
Site last updated: 23 May 2013
|
there is a lot of truth to this. in the last 3 years i have lost 2 friends who gave up on their lives. one developed diabetes and “wanted to live a normal life” even though the disease is very treatable. the other, a jovial guy, just seemed to give up. he ate the junk food he loved and watched TV sports all day. he became obese and developed 2 types of cancer and then took up alcohol. frankly, i believe an underlying issue is that people believe that life should be fun and, when it gets tough, why bother. wrong, there is still a lot to enjoy in life and taking care of yourself to make it more bearable is worth it. i don’t wish to live like i am 20 years old again. i have wisdom and know how to use it. when t’s tell me to find my inner child and find that childlike person inside of me in order to be happy, i tell ‘em they’re fired. they know nothing about life.
I would suggest that Erikson’s stages of life gives much insight into suicide in the middle years. (fall vulnerable to suicide – I have never heard it put like that: interesting)
When we feel we are no longer valuable because our work is not meaningful, and our families are raised, I think it leads to tremendous feelings of hopelessness. I think these middle years can find us disconnected or disconnecting from those we have connected to – maybe because we don’t do things like solidify friendships made during the times our kids are involved in sports activities or academic activities. We don’t make friendships important parts of our lives. We rely on work and family so much for our sense of self-worth, and identiy. When those things begin to change or lose the level of importance they once had, we feel adrift.
We are so good at getting comfortable and forgetting how we created that comfort, and that it can be created again.. and again.
Through life, we continually reinvent ourselves and redefine what is meaningful in our lives. When that doesn’t seem like an option, or doesn’t seem possible, it can feel hopeless. It can feel as if our best years of life are behind us and in front of us, nothing but aging and sadness.
Is it possible the cure is causing the ailment? I would love to see how a graph on the increase in the prescription of antidepressants AND the increase in suicides lined up. As these doctors line up to talk about how down people are getting in their mid lives, But the follow up question is “what do you do when you meet these people?” Zoloft, Paxil, Prozac? Often even the spouses and family members don’t know when the ones they love are on these drugs. Are the doctors flocking to the governing bodies reporting that their patient was on antidepressants when they made this decision? No. And nobody wants to hear it if they did. Too much cash involved.
As we move through these generations of two parents working, 51% divorce rating, day care raised, accept no self fault, “manic” culture, the ability to trust and simple satisfaction will lead to more of this type of behavior. We are a culture driven by fear and distrust with no connection to our past and no sense of future. So no wonder so many of us end up in mid life wondering why our decision have lead us to empty lives and feeling alienated and hopeless.
I am not surprised by these comments. Social isolation seems to be a growing problem. I agree with the comments about how society has changed. People are afraid of everything. Suburbs with little affordable public transportation options seem to prevent some from attending functions or gathering a local watering hole for a healthy interaction with others. In today’s society people end up staying home and if there are no people close by they stay put. The consquences of driving even after one drink prevents me from taking advantage of many social functions. I see many people just drive anyway. For me thats not an option too much anexity. I know some of you are thinking why not find other options or don’t drink. Well because I find I made life long friends through these casual meet-ups, gathers and parties. I agree there is risk in speaking my mind about this, but it’s an observation that troubles me. I’d rather not take the risk and stay home. Unfortunately for some people that’s how we enjoy spending our time socializing. I am not talking about drunken toga parties. I am talking socializing over a few beers, dancing and general lively conversation. The fear and expense have caused a lot of people to isolate. What the options for people who love people and sometimes want to let loose withoou forking out the cab etc.. I know the banter be responsible. I am responsible. In my opinion we need to find more opportunity for people to just have without the fear. I do not in anyway condone drinking and driving. It just seems everything is more complicated and the consequence too great.