I’ve been haunted by questions ever since I published my first blog entry on compulsive shopping behavior. These are questions which have become all the more pertinent after the whole schizophrenia diagnosis debate. The most troubling one of which is: Should compulsive shopping …
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I just recently read a very good article on this website about compulsive spending which hit a great big Chord inside my head. Compulsive spending is indeed able to be entered into the next DSM-V due to the fact it is a REAL sign of depression, stress, and anxiety. This alone makes it almost approaching a level of suicide possibility. I know I have almost met it! Several times! And I don’t spend ALL my income just a large part of it.
The average American does not have a compulsive spending problem. I know because a member of my family had a compulsive spending problem. We discovered her problem after she committed suicide. She committed suicide when she realized that she would not be able to spend any more money because she already had $85,000 in credit card debt within one year. When we were cleaning out her things after her death we found the same items purchased over and over and over again…never opened. We discovered a tub of name brand makeup (over 600 items all the same colors). We donated it to a woman’s shelter. We found over 300 pairs of brand new shoes. We donated at least 20 trash bags full of clothing to goodwill. We are going to try to sell the rest (at least 300 items of clothing with tags) to help pay for the funeral expenses. And I didn’t even mention the jewelry, handbags, and other items! We discovered that she was stealing from her grandparents to continue her addition. This IS a real problem and more research needs to be conducted on it.
I have been a compulsive shopper for at least 20 years. When I younger and poorer I racked up debt buying clothes that were way out of my league. I borrowed from Peter to pay Paul. I am still a compulsive shopper who buys even more, but am now able to afford the purchases without hardship. It doesn’t help. I am still plagued by guilt and self loathing over this. I feel selfish as I feel I am using up an disproportionate amount of family resources. I don’t hide it and have asked my husband to help me by someone putting limits on my spending but he is unconcerned as we can afford it. I don’t think that one’s financial ability should play a part in defining this as a psychiatric condition. It is obviously caused by some deep seated inadequacies that I am still trying to figure out. It definitely gives me a rush at purchase followed by depression. It’s a vicious cycle.
i am very poor man i am not tell long story please help me thank you
In my ever so humble opinion, the only real difference between someone in a lower income bracket and someone in a higher income bracket is the following:
1. The crisis point would occur sooner for someone in the lower income bracket, unless they were choosing to buy items of a smaller value.
2. There crisis would be larger and more prolonged even if treated for a person in a lower income bracket. Someone with a higher income can rebound easier because they can usually regain their essentials. Whereas the lower income earner may not even make enough income to cover what people would consider the essential living costs, let alone restart.
I think that people with compulsive shopping or people that buy things for no real reason are searching for something they can’t buy – Peace.
Try getting closer to God. It’s worth a try. It worked for me.
Um, I wanted to know how many people have this mental thing or whatever…I’m doing a research on this and I would really like to know how many people suffer this, just like an estimate of course. Maybe a percentage of the american shoppers. Thanks.
I have been a complusive shopper since i was about 17 years old. I buy things i can’t afford and will go to any lengths to get what I think i need. Then in the end I feel guilty, hate myself but at the moment I am buying I feel a sense of completeness and then the emptyness follows right after. I wish I could get control over it I am tring very hard. Robbing peter to pay paul is my way of life.
Shopping is my “salvation” when I am depressed. I have robbed peter to pay paul many, many times. I use shopping when when I feel guilty because I’m not doing/being what other people (usually family members) want me to do/be. I use shopping when I’m thankful that I crawled out of bed and dragged my sorry azz to work and had “down time” or “lunch time” to search e-bay and find little “gifts” for me to ship to my house as a pleasant surprise for myself when I’m depressed. Of course I have the kids hide these “gifts” so my husband doesn’t find them and figure out I’m spending money again. And I definitely use shopping when I’m disappointed and frustrated about a situation that I can’t seem to get a handle on, no matter what I try. In other words, shopping is my therapy/therapist.
I do exactly what Jodi does. I feel the need to be constantly rewarded for doing normal things. If I pay my bills this month then next month I “deserve a break”. I usually buy some large ticket item only to find that I’m still not fulfilled…..and I owe double or triple bills. I never learn because I repeat the process. I am also tortured by “needing” to buy complete sets of things. I must have every color of a good fitting clothing item…my hair products must be the same brand…..if one is good two is better and so on. It is absolute torture. I obsess over my purchases only to end up depressed and start again. If I had more money I’d buy more stuff. I have to give and throw things away to keep my house from stacking up. Undoubtedly it is a symptom of mental illness….if not a stand alone disease.
I too am a compulsive buyer! I buy things on sale and used things because I am getting a good buy. I think that I can resell them for more and sometimes do. I buy for others to make them happy and so they will think I am good and got a good deal! This IS a big problem! I think it stems from a inferiority complex I had as a child I was alway taller, bigger, and poorer than my cousin, whom I lived with for the summers. When we moved into a bigger house I was so happy that I had so much room, but it didn’t take me long to fill it up! We do not have much money..We are on social security. I would give anything to NOT do this. I have slowed down. I don’t buy if I don’t have the money to buy. What can be done???