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6 Tips for Building Emotional Muscle When Life Gets Tough

Thursday, January 15th, 2015

Woman outdoors holding flower smiling

If your emotional muscle is damaged from the past, it’s up to you to build it back up.

The scenario happens so often, it’s practically cliche:

A woman or man in an “unhappy” marriage meets someone new. Instantly, there’s a powerful connection, and maybe even an affair occurs; and, instantly, this person thinks she or he now knows how to be happy again.

6 Ways to Tell If You and Your Partner Are In a Toxic Relationship

Sunday, January 11th, 2015

upset couple backs bigst

Are you giving everything and getting nothing but hurt? It’s time to move on…

The unspoken dating rule is that once you’re bonded with someone, you don’t want to let go, even if things aren’t going great.

Since most of us like to avoid our feelings, we don’t want to do the grieving that’s necessary to let go. But when you’ve had a loss, there are a certain number of tears you must cry to let go — getting on with the crying is the fastest way. Even if the dissolution of the relationship was your idea, you may be clinging to a dream — in denial.

A bad relationship can become like an addiction — a difficult habit to break, because you are emotionally attached, and the attached part of you wants to keep trying, while the rational part knows you need to let go.

Feeling Down? Three Attitude Changers for a Happier Life

Saturday, January 10th, 2015

just-be-happy-positive-psychology-smiling-woman

Are you buzz-killing your own joy? Here’s how to tell…

Gift-giving time? Skip the over-priced mall-bought gifts forgotten the day after a birthday, an anniversary, etc. There is a better gift to give everyone — it will change their life and yours.

Embrace the concept that there is treasure in everything and fully trust that you are in the right place, at the right time. Decide that you are in charge of your life and your happiness. And the best way to share the gift of happiness with others is through gratitude.

Think you already have an attitude of gratitude? Well, think again.

Partner Diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder? 10 Truths You Need to Know

Thursday, January 8th, 2015

Therapist listening to the couple sit on the couch in front of h

I was 18 years old, pregnant, scared and lonely when I met my now husband. We became best friends and two years later, he married and had a baby. Fast forward six years, we were madly in love and engaged, then married.

One year after that, my husband came home after work, sat down at the kitchen table and told me he wanted a divorce. I refused. Not very nicely.

A few months after that, he was diagnosed with Bipolar 2, and our marriage was in for a hell of a ride. Ten years later, I’ve had a book published about our marriage, a lot of sleepless nights, and a heck of a lot of a lessons learned about loving someone with bipolar disorder. Here’s a few biggies:

3 Steps to Empower Yourself Using Your Own Anger

Wednesday, January 7th, 2015

Consequences of Emotional AbuseDo you struggle with with releasing anger and forgiving?

“Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned.” -Buddah

Rare is the individual who doesn’t have feelings of anger or disappointment towards some member or members of their family. After all, we’re all human, imperfect and limited in our perspectives.

5 Signs Stress Is Destroying Your Love Life and How to Save It

Monday, January 5th, 2015

Portrait of an upset couple

Stressed out? You may be damaging your relationship more than you think. Here’s how to fix it.

Stress is sensory overload. Love, at its best, is sensory openness.

Our senses — touch, smell, taste, seeing, hearing, and intuition — are how we experience ourselves and others. Under stress, we lose access to our senses, and therefore, lose our ability to connect intimately, and our partners may give up in frustration.

New Study: How Long Does It Take to Mend a Broken Heart?

Sunday, December 28th, 2014

heart-pinned-to-wall

Wondering when you’ll feel like yourself again?

You’ve heard it a billion times: “Time heals all wounds.” But when you go through a bad breakup, you’re probably wondering, exactly how much time are we talking?

From losing your appetite to possibly having negative health affects, you’ll probably go through a lot of changes after a relationship ends. So, it’s only natural to want to know how long after a breakup we will start to feel like ourselves again.

What 2 Little Words Can Have a BIG Impact on Your Relationship?

Thursday, December 18th, 2014

What 2 Little Words Can Have a BIG Impact on Your Relationship?

No one — including your partner — has to do anything for you. Remember that.

“Thank you.” Two simple words that feel SO good to hear.

So, why do so many couples use them so infrequently?

William James, the great American psychologist, said, “The deepest principle in human nature is the craving to be appreciated.”

Studies Show We Find Stressed Out People Less Attractive

Monday, December 15th, 2014

Ability to Manage Everyday Stress Key to Future Health SS

Your libido, appearance and more things that take a hit when you’re feeling too overwhelmed.

If being stressed out of your mind didn’t feel bad enough, there’s a study that will make you want to chill the eff out even more: Researchers discovered that men find stressed out women less attractive.

After men rated women’s faces for attractiveness, the study found that the prettiest faces consistently belonged to the women with the lowest levels of cortisol, the stress hormone.

How to Tell if You’re the Victim of Emotional Blackmail

Sunday, December 7th, 2014

How To Handle Conflict In Your Relationship

Does your partner behave inappropriately and then blames you? This could be emotional blackmail.

Many relationships function on a level that isn’t healthy for either partner, yet each person seems willing to hold onto the relationship at all costs. Their love for each other and desire to remain in the relationship is stronger than the problems they’re going through.

This can most often be seen with lovers in cases of emotional blackmail. This is where one person behaves inappropriately within the relationship and then blames the other for the behavior. The partner receiving all the blame instantly feels guilty and inadequate and wants to try harder to please.

Love Knows No Age! 5 Dating Tips for the 40 and Older Crowd

Monday, December 1st, 2014

Nourishing the Different Types of Intimacy in Your Relationship

Want to know where all the decent single men are hiding? Believe it or not, they are everywhere.

I have some news that will both surprise and delight you. Want to know where all the quality single men are? They are everywhere.

There are about 45 million single men over the age of 35 in the United States and about 8 million are over 65 years old. There are about 7 million single men in Britain and 2 million in Australia, and those are just the ones using online dating.

Couples & Money: 10 Tips to Fix Your Finances Together

Sunday, November 30th, 2014

money hand 2

This knowledge will help you avoid common financial fights.

A strong relationship with your partner, and a solid, secure financial life together, begins with what you bring to the table. As a money and relationship coach, I work with couples who struggle with this; and, while there’s a lot they need to work on together, they first must start with themselves. And so do you.

Here, I’ve outlined the 10 big ideas that I walk everyone through to get on solid footing with their finances, so that they’re ready to be honest and optimistic about their future, their finances, and their relationships.

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