Women’s Issues Articles

The Secret Lives of Women with ADHD

Sunday, September 14th, 2014

No Boundaries Juniors Pull On Maxi Tulip SkirtMany women with ADHD live with a painful secret: “Shame, unfortunately, seems to be the name of the game, for many women I have worked with who have ADHD,” said Terry Matlen, MSW, ACSW, a psychotherapist and ADHD coach.

Even women with advanced degrees in demanding, high-powered positions feel incredibly overwhelmed once they get home, stressed out by all the household details, she said. “They feel like they are living a lie — that their accomplishments are simply due to good luck.”

Finding the Yin and Yang During the Hot Summer Months

Monday, September 8th, 2014

sunny_summer-1153

It’s been a hot summer. I showed up to my yoga studio the other day, and noticed that the air purifying machine was blinking and beeping, which made me think of my kitchen lights, which just the night before had shorted out. I looked up to see the time and saw that even the clock was running slow. I was about to teach a class on the dangers of “Summer System Overload,” and the electronics were proving my point.

We know, of course, that we have to be careful when it’s hot to avoid dehydration, heatstroke, and sunburn, but extreme heat can also affect us on energetic and emotional levels. From a Taoist perspective, we are in a Yang season, and now is an important time to stay in touch with our inner Yin.

Recently Dumped? Skip the Lies and Tell Yourself This Truth

Tuesday, September 2nd, 2014

post-breakup-tips

Some men are only after one thing: a power struggle.

Pulling your hair out, perplexed and frustrated as to why the man you love doesn’t seem to reciprocate your unrequited love? After all, you know that no other woman will ever be as caring and loving as you are with him.

Your friends have given up trying to convince you that you’re too good for him. He may have even told you that you deserve better. But despite his lackluster feelings for you, why can’t you stop trying to change him? Why are you holding onto the idea of “I’m the best thing that will ever happen to him?”

5 Ways to Tell if You’re Having an Emotional Affair

Monday, September 1st, 2014

3 Signs Your Relationship is in Trouble

Would your partner really be OK with this?

Successful relationships are built on safety and trust — and a betrayal of that trust can derail a partnership before you know it. Both in the media and in our personal lives, we tend to associate such betrayals with physical affairs; however, an emotional affair, even without sex, can be just as threatening to your relationship.

Psychology Around the Net: August 30, 2014

Saturday, August 30th, 2014

workplace-mobbing-bullying-business-woman

Do you care for a person with Alzheimer’s Disease and wonder how you can better help them — and yourself — make it day by day? What about a fear of asking for advice? Ever heard of sleep drunkenness? We have it all and more in this week’s Psychology Around the Net.

Risky Situations At Work Lead Women To Feel More Anxiety Than Men, Says Study: A new study recently presented at the annual meeting of the American Sociological Association found that women are more likely than men to fold under the pressure of risky situations at work and, thus, perform worse than they would during normal situations.

Relationship Lies: Learn These 4 Dating Myths NOW Ladies

Wednesday, August 27th, 2014

The Secret to Great Relationships of Any Kind

No, you won’t “just know” when you meet the right guy.

Are you totally baffled as to why you only seem to attract men who are far from ideal for you? Are you tired of ending up with men who aren’t ready for the same type of relationship you want?

Before you give up on the possibility of ever meeting a guy who truly measures up, you may want to take a look at how the following so-called “dating rules” may be adversely hurting your chances of finding The One.

Couples You Meet in Counseling: The Ice Queen and the Martyr

Monday, August 25th, 2014

upset couple backs bigstMy first post in this series tackled Mr. Perfect and his crazy wife. Here we turn to The Ice Queen and the Martyr, another commonly seen couple.

Here are some examples of what you hear from The Martyr in session:

“No matter what I do, it’s not good enough. She doesn’t show any appreciation or affection. I guess I don’t communicate well. But I’ve heard from other girlfriends that I’m actually great at communicating. “

“We haven’t had sex in months. She pushes me away. I guess I should try harder, but I already schedule date nights, help with housework, and get up with the baby.”

The Truth about Couples Therapy

Thursday, August 21st, 2014

upset couple backs bigstI always say that every couple would benefit from therapy. As a couples therapist myself, I am privy to the benefits of therapy both after problems begin and as a preventative measure. As some brilliant person once said, “The best time to fix a leaky roof is when the sun is shining.”

But the truth is, most people aren’t entirely enthusiastic about the prospect of couples therapy. Who wants to voluntarily do something that conjures up images of a woman in a beige sweater looking over her glasses, asking, “And how do you feel about that?”

Sexual Addiction, Depression, and the Emotional Affair

Tuesday, August 12th, 2014

JealousyI am helping my friend, I’ll call her Pam, end an emotional affair. I mean, it’s not the kind of emotional affair where she tells the guy that she loves him. They don’t have secret meetings, or talk every day, or have “code language.”

To an outsider, the relationship wouldn’t seem inappropriate in the slightest. Yet she’s invested herself emotionally — letting it take a big chunk out of her heart — which is creating all kinds of guilt and anxiety for her.

Consequences of Emotional Abuse

Friday, August 1st, 2014

Consequences of Emotional AbuseI come from a family where abuse has had a generational continuity. My grandfather abused my grandmother. My grandmother abused her son, daughter-in-law and other people. (She threw food at me once.) My father bullies his wife and daughter. My mother is emotionally violent to me. I go crazy and can break stuff around my mother.

Overall it is a very disturbing home environment. No one knows how to get out of the situation and we continue to harm each other. At times it feels like a spiraling battle to death. My grandpa passed away recently, ending his part.

Couples You Meet in Counseling: Mr. Perfect and His Crazy Wife

Tuesday, July 29th, 2014

Couples You Meet in Counseling: Mr. Perfect and His Crazy Wife“What is her problem all the damn time? Why can’t she just chill out? We don’t have problems, she has problems. I have to get back to work.”

The man who comes into counseling with this sort of mindset we will call Mr. Perfect. This high-achieving specimen of masculinity is usually in some field requiring an excess of education or on-the-job training. He is successful in his career and receives a lot of positive feedback.

Not just competent at work, he can also take the kids for an afternoon on his own because he is calm, cool and collected in all situations, even those involving toddlers and poop. His friends consider him a good guy. He is attractive and well-spoken. In an emergency, he is the person you want around. What a guy, right? (Don’t swoon just yet.)

To Pucker Up… Or Not: How Cosmetics Can Affect Your Relationships

Friday, July 25th, 2014

lipstick

Are you making the right makeup choices in order to find — and keep the one?

As a woman, it’s no surprise to you that just about every lady has an interesting relationship with makeup. You may have a daily routine with lipstick, eyeshadow or a magic concealer that you can’t go without. You may have a signature look that makes you feel confident. You may even hate it, but wear it for certain occasions for different reasons.

You may be surprised, but this tumultuous relationship with makeup actually influences love life. Is it for the better or worse?

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