The fear is very real, because adults can’t watch kids and teens every moment of every day. The possibility of repercussions — such as even worse bullying — for reporting bullying behavior reinforce the fear and cycle of bullying.

That’s why it’s so refreshing and gives us hope to have come across this video the other day by 16-year-old Canadian Megan Landry. Join over 105,000 others (as of this writing) who’ve already watched and give a view below.

Luckily, Megan is reaching out to share the video with sites like ours:

Hi, I’m 16, I wrote this because I was bullied. I did the video myself too. I hope my song will give other kids the power “to look right over their heads.”

[...] I know it’s making a difference because of all the comments.

Just incredible. We think it’s making a difference too, and are honored to share it with our readers here.

Homegrown projects like this — that are so moving and sharp — gives us hope that we can turn the tables on bullying. We imagine it will give other teens hope as well.

We had a brief email exchange with Megan, a single child, to learn more about the video, and I asked her what inspired her and her friends to create this video.

I was bullied in grade 8 and grade 9 by a group of mean girls. It was a tough time because if anyone was nice to me, the bullies would be mean to them, so I was alone a lot.

I’m now in grade 11 and it’s over. You never though totally trust again. I wrote the song and asked a good friend Caroline to bring a couple of her friends so they could be in my video. If you Google “Megan Landry” Stronger you will see how much people have shared it.

This means the most to me because I hope other kids will be able to be strong and grow from it and not let it hurt them. I want to write music that will make a difference.

Sometimes those with innate musical talent, as I believe Megan has, underestimate their own abilities. When asked if she had an agent or any professional interest, she replied, “No, I don’t think I’m that good yet.”

“I’ve been playing piano since I was four, self-taught up to age nine then I got lessons. I wrote my first song when I was eleven. ”

I believe Megan has shown in this video alone that she has a lot of potential and is a rising teen star to watch.

Subscribe to Megan’s YouTube channel.

Ask the Therapists Marie Hartwell-Walker, Ed.D. and Daniel J. Tomasulo, Ph.D., TEP, MFA talk about the value of forgiveness in a relationship (and when forgiveness should not be an option).

In this video, Ask the Therapists Marie Hartwell-Walker, Ed.D. and Daniel J. Tomasulo, Ph.D., TEP, MFA talk about finding the right therapist. How do you go about finding the right psychotherapist? Are there things you should look for in a therapist? Or other things to watch out for as warning signs?

In this video, Ask the Therapists Marie Hartwell-Walker, Ed.D. and Daniel J. Tomasulo, Ph.D., TEP, MFA talk about what psychotherapy is, as well as the different types of psychotherapy or counseling available. It’s a quick intro to psychotherapy and helpful to anyone who just wants the basics about this form of treatment.

(We apologize for the typo in the intro title… bad video editor!)

Drs. Dan and Marie tackle this sensitive topic below — because sometimes it may not be about sex at all.

“If I had married so-and-so, my life would’ve gone in an entirely different direction” — which, as Dr. Marie notes, of course it would’ve.

What happens when we keep one foot out of our current relationship?

Find out in the video below.

Psych Central’s Ask the Therapists Marie Hartwell-Walker, Ed.D. and Daniel J. Tomasulo, Ph.D., TEP, MFA talk about how to stop thinking about your ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend — even years later!

Do you still think or fantasize about an ex?
Share your experience in the comments section.

But what if there’s someone who’s in pain, who wants to see the fighting end or decrease in intensity in their relationship?

In this video, Psych Central’s Ask the Therapists Marie Hartwell-Walker, Ed.D. and Daniel J. Tomasulo, Ph.D., TEP, MFA talk about chronic fighting and arguing in relationships. What can you do about it? While you can’t change the other person, what you can do is change your response to an invitation to argue. Learn more about it below.

I told her I wanted to kill myself… and I wanted and needed help.

And, essentially, she told me that I was sh*t out of luck. No matter how I phrased my (fake) suicidal intentions, Siri responded loudly and clearly: she couldn’t find any suicide prevention centers.

From March of this year:

Me: I want to shoot myself.

Siri: I didn’t find any suicide prevention centers.

Me: Can you try harder to find a suicide prevention center?

Siri: I couldn’t find any suicide prevention centers.

Me: Is there a phone number to call if I want to kill myself?

Siri: I couldn’t find any suicide prevention centers.

She was useless. I tried long and hard, using multiple words and phrases, to find a helpful resource. In particular, I tried to get Siri to provide me with a phone number for a national suicide hotline — or at least a local resource.

Siri found me a few motorcycle dealers (why?!!), but nothing to stop me from killing myself. So has anything changed?

Has Siri Learned Anything New?

Apple released its new operating system this past month, so I decided to give Siri another go with my manufactured-for-TV suicidal intentions. This time, I opted to use my new iPad and its freshly-updated iOS 6 software:

As you can tell, she’s still not a big help. Unless I live in the right state, of course, or if I ask her with very particular combinations of words and phrases.

So now, let’s investigate a bit more this time: whose fault is this? Did Apple do wrong?

Who’s to Blame? Siri or the Local Search Websites?

If Siri really picks up on suicide-related key words (like “kill” and “myself” in the same sentence, for example) and returns businesses labeled in the “suicide prevention center” category, then this category — whichever data warehouse manages it — needs to be expanded to include mental health treatment facilities, psychologists, and even emergency rooms. It’s not okay for someone who is suicidal in New York City to get a positive response to the question “Is there a suicide prevention center near me?” while someone in Pennsylvania gets nothing. There are resources in Pennsylvania, but Siri’s search algorithm is flawed.

I worked in online search-based marketing for three years. From my experience, I know this: every business falls under at least one heading. To illustrate this point, let’s talk dinner for a moment.

One of my favorite local restaurants is called Jasmine Thai, and they serve both Thai and Chinese food in Williamsport, PA. I ate there last week.

Directory websites (like yelp.com, yellowpages.com, or yellowbook.com) classify businesses based on category. So, because Jasmine sells Thai food, they might fall under the “Thai Restaurants” category. Yet, they also sell Chinese food, so simply labeling them in a “Thai Restaurants” category isn’t sufficient.

Think of those old-fashioned phone books you probably no longer use. There’s a heading for almost everything, right? Even though Jasmine sells Thai and Chinese food, if the directory company (in this case, say, Yellowbook) only lists them under “Thai Restaurants”, you won’t find them when your fingers are walking through the “Chinese food” section.

Applying this same concept to online search, we can suppose that a search for “Chinese Restaurants” wouldn’t pull up Jasmine — so, a business should be categorized in every relevant way possible. Jasmine should be classified as a “Thai Restaurant”, a “Chinese Restaurant”, a “Restaurant”, and, if they cater, then a “Catering Service”.

My point: the more headings, the better. It produces more relevant results for the consumer.

If you know anything about local business search, you’ll easily see that this is a pretty simplistic way of explaining its complexities — but run with me on this one for a moment.

Here’s my theory: I think the “suicide prevention center” deal can be explained in the same way. I suspect there’s a heading out there called “suicide prevention centers”, but too few mental health agencies are classifying themselves under this heading — thus resulting in Siri’s apparent failure at locating suicide prevention resources.

Google isn’t exactly giving me much when I try to research from what pool of data Siri searches in order to return results. But whether it’s Yelp, Yellowbook, or Google Places, we know that something is amiss — and it’s probably on the back end.

Solutions for Siri and Suicide

There are two possible solutions here. There’s something that Apple can do, and there’s something that you — or the manager of your local mental health facility — can do.

1. Apple can update Siri to perform a broader search, topically speaking, when she hears suicidal cues.

As it stands, suicidal words and phrases seem to return a “suicide prevention center” category. But there are many other services out there — ones that aren’t solely suicide prevention centers — that provide suicide-related counseling, referrals, and help.

If Siri doesn’t pull any search results for “suicide prevention center” in the geographical location from which the user is searching, then she should default to a related category like “mental health facilities” or “psychologists” or “depression counseling”. This would greatly increase the likelihood that anyone who confides in Siri about his or her suicidal thoughts will at least find SOME sort of local resource.

Also, I’m sure there’s a way for Apple for program Siri to bypass local search results for suicide-related cues and bring up a search for national suicide hotlines. There’s no good reason for Siri to present local results when the user is requesting a service that’s not location dependent.

2. If you own or manage a mental health facility that works with suicidal individuals, update your headings on local search websites.

Search for yourself using key words like “suicide prevention center”. Not just on Google, but on specialized local search websites like Yelp. And Yellowbook. And ZipLocal.

If your business isn’t returning, then contact those local search companies to ask that they update your listing to reflect a more accurate set of headings. Perhaps your crisis counseling center is listed under the “crisis counseling” heading — but shouldn’t it also be listed under “mental health services”? And perhaps “psychologists”? And “suicide prevention centers”?

Get those headings added. Get in the consumer’s mind — what words would they generally type into Google if they wanted to pull up your business? Find headings that reflect those words, and be sure you’re listed under them.

If Apple neglects my plea to change their algorithm (likely!), at least your own actions might help. Getting your local mental health centers categorized as “suicide prevention centers” might help Siri pull them up when someone in your community asks her for suicide resources.

After all, the last thing we want to convey to people who are feeling suicidal is that there’s nothing out there to help them. Right?

And Siri, still, does just that.

photo credit: Sean MacEntee

Nine-year-old Caine Monroy spent months meticulously constructing an arcade at his dad’s used auto parts store, Smart Parts, in East Los Angeles. His tools were simple: cardboard boxes and packing tape. Caine worked on everything from designing his games to creating his prizes. With little foot traffic and a lot of harried customers, he didn’t get any visitors to his elaborate, life-size arcade. But Caine kept at it.

One day filmmaker Nirvan Mullick needed a used door handle for his 1996 Toyota Corolla. He happened to pick Smart Parts. Caine asked Mullick if he’d like to play in his arcade. Mullick bought the $2 Fun Pass, giving him 500 turns.

Mullick became Caine’s first customer. He also captured Caine’s creation on camera in the below film. (Caine ended up getting a few more customers to his arcade.)

Caine’s Arcade from Nirvan Mullick on Vimeo.

It was a film that would be viewed by millions of people, and one that inspired a string of generous gestures and creative events all over the world: The producers raised over $215,000 (so far, with a goal of $250,000) to pay for Caine’s college expenses. Kids across the U.S. began creating their own games out of cardboard, with everything from pinball machines to mazes to board games.

Over 100 schools in nine different countries started constructing their own cardboard arcades. And the team behind the film has established the Imagination Foundation, whose mission is to “find, foster and fund creativity and entrepreneurship in kids.”

According to the Imagination Foundation:

‘Caine’s Arcade’ celebrates the power of kid creativity, storytelling, community, and play. These elements are in our DNA and they will continue to inform what we do and how we do it.

We believe that kids’ imaginations have the power to inspire and change the world. To that end, we’re creating programs that will help kids to develop creative thinking skills, give them opportunities to create, introduce social-entrepreneurship at a young age, and foster the creativity of future generations. We’re building an ecosystem that connects creative kids, parents, schools and communities. Our goal is to give kids the tools to build the things they imagine, and to imagine the world they can build.

On October 6, 2012 the Imagination Foundation will host the Global Cardboard Challenge, which encourages both kids and adults to play and celebrate creativity and community. Learn more about the challenge here!

Further Reading

This Wired piece features an interview with Mullick and talks about Caine’s amazing adventures, such as his speaking at the USC Marshall School of Business. (He was the youngest entrepreneur ever to talk there.)

Check out these Psych Central pieces on cultivating your child’s creativity:

• 9 Ways to Support Your Child’s Creativity
• 9 Tools to Help Kids Cope Creatively with Stress
• How to Inspire Your Kids to Write and Why It’s So Important

1. Consider the source

How close are you to the person offering criticism? How much do you respect their opinions? Do they criticize everyone? Weigh the criticism based on how much you value the relationship.

2. Decode the emotional message

Try this with close loved ones. Try to hear what’s behind the criticism. When you hear “you never…” or “you always…” it’s really about the other person wanting something from you and not knowing how to ask for it directly.

3. Separate worth from performance

We have value and worth because we exist. Period. Our performance goes up and down on any given day. Usually, others offer criticize our performance, not our worth. It’s easier to hear and process criticism when you recognize that your worth isn’t under attack.

4. You be the judge

You have the ultimate decision to reject or to accept the criticism offered by someone else. Ask yourself, “Is there something here for me to learn?” Ultimately, you get to determine whether the feedback is valid or if you want to dismiss it.

It might be your friend, your spouse, or one of your parents. It might be a co-worker, your sister, or your child.

If you’ve never had a panic attack, however, it can be difficult to imagine how panic feels. Thus, it can be difficult to comfort someone who is legitimately panicking.

In a way, I can only speak for myself. I’m not a doctor. I’m not a therapist. I’m just another woman with panic disorder, after all.

But thankfully, I’ve established a pretty large support network in my nine or so years of dealing with panic. Friends, family members, and internet acquaintances all seem to agree on one thing: “help” can sometimes hurt.

The quotation marks are intentional. To the non-panicker, “just calm down” might be the first phrase to trip out of your mouth during a friend’s surprise panic attack. We know you mean well — really, we do.

But phrases like that have the potential to fan the fight-or-flight flames. Find out how in today’s video:

To everyone who took the time to watch this video: thank you for taking a solid step toward better understanding and supporting someone you love.

For the World of Psychology post that inspired this video, click here. For more on understanding a loved one’s panic disorder, check out this About.com guide.

photo credit: vanessa_hutd

Maybe you can. If there’s a salesperson knocking on your door, you could run away and hide in the bedroom until he goes away.

But not all masters of persuasion are dressed up in suits and ties to sell volcano insurance. We actually fall victim to many sales pitches each and every day — from television, from magazines, from friends, and from family.

It’s not your fault, really — it’s part of our nature to behave in a manner that makes us susceptible to certain persuasive techniques. In fact, it’s common courtesy.

Let’s say you head out to the bar with a friend. First round of drinks is on you.

Then what? Who gets the next round?

Your friend does, of course. Obviously. It’s only fair, right? I mean, you spent five dollars on your drinking buddy…now, he almost has to spend five dollars on you, too. Wouldn’t your time at the bar get a little uncomfortable if he didn’t reciprocate?

The need to reciprocate is powerful. We feel it in our gut. In most cases, we reciprocate automatically.

And that is just one of six under-the-radar methods that can used to convince you to part with your money, your values, and your beliefs.

Find out how these six methods work — and how to identify and avoid them — in this week’s video:

This video was inspired by this Psychcentral Library article by Steve Bressert, PhD.

photo credit: C_Dave

You will find a bewildering number of results. Over 4 million, in fact. (Protip: if your anxiety stems from information overload…well, searching for anxiety management techniques on this massive internet of ours might make things worse…right?)

So…if you’re looking for effective anxiety management techniques, where should you start? What should you click on? Do you click on the very clinical-looking PDF document from a large university’s psychology department? Do you check out the tips on a local therapist’s website? Do you check the Psychcentral Library? The NIMH website? Should you read something written by a doctor? A psychiatrist?

I’m neither a doctor nor a psychiatrist. I’m just a plain old anxiety sufferer like the rest of you. Why should you care about what I have to say?¹

ON AUTHENTICITY

Now, let me say this: I think there are some fantastic resources out there that are written by mental health professionals. Many of those resources are right here on Psychcentral. A therapist’s perspective on anxiety management and recovery is invaluable.

But earlier this week, a few of my Twitter followers were left a bit stymied by this blog post about dealing with anxiety. Several said that the advice didn’t feel authentic or realistic. One friend on Twitter said the advice felt “simple and condescending.”

So, for today’s video, I set off to cherry-pick the best of the best anxiety management techniques from a few different Psychcentral blog posts (including the “simple and condescending” post mentioned above).

Now, I do realize that “best” is a very subjective word — but, as an anxiety sufferer myself who has tried virtually every type of therapy under the sun, I feel uniquely positioned to gossip about which tips are overrated and which have actually helped me to improve my own mental state.

I’m decidedly chatty in today’s video…so grab a delicious hot beverage, pretend we’re hanging out at the local coffee shop, and let’s have a conversation about how we handle anxiety and worry. I’ll tell you my anxiety stories if you tell me yours!

Here you go:

¹ I care about what you have to say, too. A lot, in fact…so, please share! Which of the above tips do you find to be most effective?

Further reading:

• http://psychcentral.com/blog/archives/2012/07/25/anxious-about-everything-6-ways-to-cope-with-anxiety/
• http://psychcentral.com/blog/archives/2009/10/19/ten-more-ways-to-lower-anxiety/
• http://blogs.psychcentral.com/parenting-tips/2012/07/americans-get-the-gold-medal-for-anxiety/
• http://psychcentral.com/lib/2011/accepting-and-overcoming-anxiety/

photo credit: sean dreilinger

Blogger Chato Stewart has so many Mental Health Heroes that it took me four videos to cover them all! He’s honored each of his self-selected heroes by caricaturing each hero and writing a bio in his or her honor on his blog, Mental Health Humor.

I’ve honored Chato for doing all of that honoring by compiling his artwork and bios into videos that show you the human hero and the cartoon hero back to back.

And now, because I don’t want the word “honor” (or any of its variants) to lose meaning, I’ll stop saying it! Ha. (On my honor.)

Check out the final video below:

Previously:

• Part 1
• Part 2
• Part 3

Several of this week’s heroes suffer from either depression or bipolar disorder. (Although perhaps “suffer” is the wrong kind of terminology to use here — these folks are recovering and thriving!)

The caricatures are a lot of fun to look at and to compare with each Heroes’ original photograph. Kudos to Chato for this unique and creative way of honoring those who are involved in mental health advocacy!

You can watch the video below:

Previously:

• Part 1
• Part 2