Depression

How to Get Out of Bed When You’re Depressed

A woman on ProjectBeyondBlue.com, my depression community, recently asked me this: “You exercise daily and eat the right things. You research and write this stuff for a living. But what about those of us who can’t get out of bed in the morning? What about when you are too depressed to exercise, eat right, or work? How do you simply get out of bed?”

The honest answer is that I don’t know.
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General

How to Love Your Partner When They’re the Least Lovable


Last week I walked in my front door after a long day of seeing clients, arms full of groceries, and was welcomed by a barking dog, a kitchen full of dirty dishes, and my husband cheerfully waving “hello” to me from his comfy spot on the couch. My heart sank and my blood began to boil.

As I proceed to trip over the dog, kick her water bowl and spill it all over, and drop a bag of groceries, praying the eggs didn’t break, all I could muster was a sharp, “Umm, could I get some help, here?” To which my husband responded with a bubbly, “Ya, hold on, let me finish watching this (YouTube) video -- this is hilarious!”
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Anxiety and Panic

Stop a Panic Attack with Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT)


It's really simple...and could change your life.

Are you one of the over 3 million people who suffer from panic attacks at some point in their lives? A panic attack is an occurrence of paralyzing fear and anxiety that comes out of the blue, for no apparent reason. Dealing with anxiety and panic attacks is like being hit with a tidal wave.

That's what happened to me one evening as I drove home on a busy freeway, one I had driven on for years. As I was about to go down a steep grade, I suddenly couldn't breathe and felt as if I were about to pass out. My body felt cold and clammy and I was terrified I might be having a heart attack. Somehow, I managed to find a way to pull over and calm myself until I was able to get home.
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Brain and Behavior

1-Minute Mindfulness Exercises

Interested in doing mindfulness meditation but don't think you have the time? Below are 9 mindfulness exercises you can do in a minute or under.

Yawn and stretch for 10 seconds every hour.
Do a fake yawn if you have to. That will trigger real ones. Say “ahh” as you exhale. Notice how a yawn interrupts your thoughts and feelings. This brings you into the present.

Then stretch really, really slowly for at least 10 seconds. Notice any tightness and say "ease" or just say hello to that place (being mindful -- noticing without judgment). Take another 20 seconds to notice and then get back to what you were doing.

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General

5 Tips for Being Truly Productive on Your Own Terms

Creative living coach Jamie Ridler, CPCC, lives in Toronto, where it seems that just about anyone answers the question “How are you?” with “I’m busy” and “I’m tired.”

Of course, the same is likely true in your neck of the woods as well. All of us have a lot going on, and we might be scrambling to get stuff done and keep up.

But as leadership coach Tanya Geisler, CPCC, ACC, said, “getting stuff done is not intrinsically the same as getting important, meaningful, soul-nourishing, compassionate stuff done.”
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Family

7 Steps to Achieve Your New Year’s Resolutions

Congratulations! Despite the sarcastic negativity and nay-sayers, you have chosen a path of self-improvement. Here are seven simple things you can do to make sure you achieve all of your 2016 goals.

Treat yourself.
Your goals require a special type of strength from your mind and body. Acknowledge this, own this, and love yourself for deciding to improve despite the challenge it will be.

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Anxiety and Panic

Finding the Illusive Optimism Hidden Inside Us All

"Dwell on the beauty of life. Watch the stars, and see yourself running with them." -- Marcus Aurelius (121-180 AD)
In the film “Adaptation,” stressed-out screenwriter Charlie Kaufman has a twin brother, Donald, who’s seemingly perfect. He’s everything Charlie’s not. No, Donald’s not the most handsome or successful guy in the world. What Donald has in spades is optimism.

He’s not afraid to try something new and he’s no stranger to failure. He’s not defined by how others perceive him, and he doesn’t let their opinions hold him back. He doesn’t anticipate the worst-case scenario, so he doesn’t live his life paralyzed by what-ifs.
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General

How Do You Use Your Limited Time & Brain Cycles?

There's a meme that started way back in 2007 talking about a professor who fills up a jar full of golf balls, pebbles, and sand to demonstrate that you should fill your life with the important things first (the larger golf balls), so that the little things (the pebbles and sand) don't take up all the room in your life (the jar).

There's a reason memes become popular and get shared online -- because there is some kind of universal truth connected to them that people recognize. This clever story of a jar and golf balls is just such a meme.

You have a very short time on this planet -- much shorter than you realize when you take into account the tens of thousands of years of civilization before you were born, and the likely tens of thousands of years in the future. How are you going to spend that time? What kind of things will you spend most days focusing on -- the little, useless things, or the bigger, meaningful stuff?

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General

Be SMART and Avoid Failing at New Year’s Resolutions

Do you know people who have a hard time maintaining their big New Year's goals past February? Who are the people around you who joke, "Yeah, I made a resolution to lose weight, but then Valentine's Day came around." Or "I made a resolution to quit smoking, but then I needed a break at work."

If making and sticking to goals is hard for you, it does not mean that you are helpless, hopeless, or should give up trying. Far too many people make goals that are too big, too general, way too difficult, and without any tracking tools. People tend to create large, grandiose, long-term goals with no short-terms goals to guide the process. Follow the SMART method below to reach your resolutions for 2016.
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General

New Year’s and Values

In Hamlet, cranky Polonius gives his son Laertes, who is about to venture out into the world, this advice: "This above all, to thine own self be true." (As it happens, it is ironic advice, as Polonius himself is duplicitous and rarely shows the self-awareness he wants his son to embrace.) Deep down, what Shakespeare is getting at is that you need not to be afraid to know yourself and accept yourself, flaws and all.

I'm not a big one for New Year's resolutions, but this past New Year's I had what I call a New Year's revelation. Taking time out to disconnect and detox, I realized what happens when you fight feelings of anxiety and vulnerability and are not being your true self. When you shut those feelings off, you are disconnected from that which brings meaning to your life.

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Addiction

An Open Letter from a Wife in Recovery

Please note, this letter is my own and unrelated to any Al-Anon approved literature.
After reading An Open Letter From an Addict, I took the liberty of writing a letter back early on in my own recovery. Yes, my recovery.

After finding out my husband was actively using for years, I was devastated. How could I not know? What was I thinking this whole time?

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