3 Tips for Raising Kids Who Aren’t Entitled

Does your child expect you to do things for him or her? Do they rarely lift a finger to help? Are they quick to blame others? Do they try to manipulate people to get their way? Do you spend a lot of time rescuing them? For instance, maybe you remind them about deadlines, finish their projects and drive forgotten items to school.

Does your child freak out when they don’t get their way? Do you find yourself resorting to bribes and rewards to get them to cooperate? Do you bend over backwards for them? For instance, maybe you make three different dinners to satisfy all three kids’ appetites. Maybe you rush out to buy their favorite toothpaste. Maybe you work extra to give them a pricey wardrobe every season.

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Brain and Behavior

7 Body Language Mistakes that Could Hold You Back at Work

For the past two months, you’ve had your eye on that promotion. It’s between you and your colleague, and you really want the job. So you put in crazy hours, deliver top-notch work, and take on extra projects to show your work. You don’t see any reason it shouldn’t go to you.

But when the time comes for the promotion to be announced, it goes to your colleague instead. What could possibly have gone wrong?

Turns out, it may totally be unrelated to the quality and quantity of the work you churn out. Instead, it could be a factor of something far more subconscious: your body language.
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How to Stop Pessimistic Self-Fulfilling Prophecies from Shaping Your Life

You believe that you’ll never have a healthy relationship, so you pick partners who are unavailable. You believe you’ll bomb the presentation, so you don’t practice. You believe you’re going to have a frustrating day, so you’re snippy with your spouse, which triggers a fight, which makes you miss your train, which makes you late for work. You believe you’ll have a bad time at a party, so you don’t talk to anyone. Others perceive you as cold and aloof, and don’t approach you either.

These are different examples of the same thing: self-fulfilling prophecies.
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What to Reveal to a Spouse

In a good marriage we can be ourselves more with our partner than with anyone else in the world. We can have imperfections and still be loved. Being vulnerable means risking sharing our true selves instead of saying what we think our partner wants to hear. Sharing thoughts and feelings fosters trust and intimacy.

According to meditation teacher and author Sharon Salzburg, “Embracing our inherent vulnerability is one of the best ways to break the cycle of fear and self-preoccupation. This can be as simple as accepting help from others when we need it … We think we should be in charge all the time, that we should always be in control … it’s just not true.”

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Improving Communication in Relationships

To paraphrase a realtor’s mantra, the three keys to a successful marriage are "communication, communication, and communication." Without good communication skills and quality time dedicated to communicating, relationships soon flounder and fail, especially among couples with the stress of careers and a full family life. Couples need to learn that their relationship is not a thing, but a process.

There are three basic steps to being a good listener and therefore a good communicator:

Stay on the subject.
Listen to be sure you are staying on the subject.
Adapt your behavior if you aren’t staying on the subject.

How can you keep healthy communication lines open? Recognize and implement these requirements:

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5 Ways to Handle Being Humiliated by a Loved One

Do not let their cruel or careless comment slide!

Does your husband or wife regularly make jokes at your expense, or take cheap-shots at you in front of others? It hurts, doesn't it? It can feel earth-shaking and downright humiliating when your partner puts you down (however playfully) in front co-workers, family or friends.

Regardless of your culture, socio-demographics, income, religion, or the fact that this behavior is common among millions of couples, your feelings still matter. And the behavior is not OK if it doesn't feel OK to you.

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How Shame Contaminates Our Lives — and a Path Toward Healing

Growing up, did you hear messages like, “What’s wrong with you? Can't you do anything right? You’ll never succeed at anything!” Have these toxic criticisms left you with a subtle background feeling of shame? Or perhaps you learned to keep feelings inside because no one was interested in your inner world.

Until fairly recently, shame was neglected as a field of study in psychology. But there has been a growing recognition of how toxic shame stifles self-worth, inhibits intimacy, and keeps us suppressed.

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The Power of Relationship Assumptions

We all make relationship assumptions. We assume what another person is feeling or thinking. We assume how that person is going to respond to us. We create a story in our heads about how others see us, how they judge us or whether they like or care about us.

We make these assumptions all the time, but we don’t realize that they are assumptions. We treat them as absolute truth. We believe them without hesitation. We’re often wrong.

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How Talking to Yourself Can Save Your Marriage

People don’t just get upset. They contribute to their upsetness. ~ Albert Ellis
For a good marriage, who do you think is the most important person with whom you should communicate well? If you think it’s your spouse, think again.

The most important person to converse with constructively is yourself! You need not try to resolve every situation by talking it over with your partner. Self-talk refers to the messages we say to ourselves. You can change destructive messages you tell yourself into supportive ones.

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