Anger

Timing is Everything

When it comes to giving advice to a loved one who has messed up, striking while the iron is hot is likely to get you scalded.

Yes, you may be dying to tell him what he did wrong, what he should have done, what he absolutely needs to do now, and more, but the path of wisdom suggests you zip your lip, at least for the time being.

This doesn’t mean your viewpoint doesn’t count. Not...
Continue Reading

Personal

8 Warning Signs for Silent Domestic Abuse Victims


Do NOT miss these signals.

As the founder of a nonprofit that serves domestic abuse victims, I get a ton of emails from women who are reaching out for help -- not because they are abused, but because they aren't sure if they are being abused at all.

And as a domestic violence survivor myself who was married to an abuser for eight years, I'm going to let you in on a little secret here: If you're wondering if you're being abused, there's a good chance that you are.

Continue Reading

Anxiety and Panic

Psychology Around the Net: July 2, 2016


Happy Saturday, Psych Central readers (and Happy Fourth of July to you American readers)!

This week's edition of Psychology Around the Net covers why we might benefit more from summer reading than books we pick up any other time of the year, several New York University studies gone wrong, how one psychiatry professor is fed up with the way new generations of psychiatrists are using their education, and more.

Enjoy!

Continue Reading

General

Can You Hear Compliments? How to Let Praise into Your Life

I was recently having a conversation with an old friend. We were talking about what was up lately and I was so excited about what was going on in her life, that I didn’t even realize that I was missing so much of what she said. It wasn’t until later, when I was recounting the conversation to my husband, that I realized she had paid me a lot of compliments and I glossed over every one like they never happened.

It’s not humility. Humility means
Continue Reading

Anxiety and Panic

6 Incredibly Effective Ways to Love Someone with Social Anxiety


How to nurture your relationship with your socially anxious partner.

What is social anxiety disorder? It's a type of anxiety disorder characterized by fear of negative evaluation or humiliation, concerns about the judgments of others, and worry that one will be rejected. According to the Anxiety and Depression Association of America, it's one of the most common anxiety disorders, affecting around 15 million people in the United States.

Continue Reading

Brain and Behavior

The Healing Power of Hugs

One day several years ago, I spontaneously hugged a patient of mine, Gretchen. It was during a moment in which her despair and distress were so intense that it seemed cruel on a human level not to reach out my arms to her, in the event that she might derive some relief or comfort from an embrace. She hugged me for dear life.

Months later, Gretchen reported to me that the hug had changed her. “The motherly embrace you gave me that day,” she said, “lifted the depression I have had all my life.”

Continue Reading

Marriage and Divorce

Why Using the Dreaded ‘D’ Word Could Sabotage Your Marriage


It's a cheap shot!

Arguments or disagreements are a natural part of marriage. As much as we love our partner, we become annoyed or upset with one another probably more often than we would like to admit.

We may choose to 'blow off steam' toward our spouse exactly because our spouse is the one person who will love us 'no matter what.' However, it is never, ever appropriate to use the D-word when arguing with your spouse. And by D-word, I mean: the word 'divorce.'

Continue Reading

Friends

Having Trouble Making Friends? Stop Obsessing Over Yourself


It's actually pretty simple. “If you want to be interesting, you have to be interested.” These are the famous words of my husband’s grandmother. She took conversation making seriously, and understood the golden rule of friendships -- put into people what you want back.

When it comes to making friends, we all pretty much understand the same principle applies: to have a friend, we know we have to be a friend. But sometimes this isn’t so straightforward, and is harder than it seems.
Continue Reading

Family

Falling in Love with Your Spouse — Again!

A successful marriage means falling in love many times, always with the same person. -- Mignon McLaughlin
Do you view marriage as a destination or a journey? If you view it as a journey, you’re infinitely more likely to succeed.

Those who view marriage as a destination are likely to become disillusioned. When the glow fades, they’ll wonder: “How could I have married this person who is so annoyingly different from me?!!!”
Continue Reading

Children and Teens

3 Surprising Ways Kids Can Affect Your Relationship—and What to Do

Parents-to-be have certain assumptions and expectations about what life will look like when their little one is born and comes home. This is understandable. All of us hold a slew of ideas about any big change in our lives (about anything really). But often those expectations don’t exactly align with reality. Which can affect how we prepare for the transition.

A common belief parents have is that their child will automatically fit into...
Continue Reading

Anxiety and Panic

Psychology Around the Net: June 25, 2016


Happy Saturday, Psych Central readers!

Whew, I've had a stressful week. I've been juggling everything from major work deadlines to doctor appointments to preparing our guestroom for entertaining company all weekend, and honestly, the only thing that's helped keep me focused is my to-do list.

That's right. I am a huge advocate of to-do lists. I know some people avoid them, but, not I. I can't even explain the sheer elation I feel each time I mark off a...
Continue Reading

Brain and Behavior

Family Constellation Work

For all of us who have experienced family life and its impact, with all of its places of light and darkness, there is a wonderful group process that fosters present-day healing. It is called family constellation work and is a day-long workshop run by a trained facilitator.

Family constellation workshops were started by Dr. Bert Hellinger, a family therapist from Germany, and are now available worldwide. Participants target an area of their present life that needs clarity, resolution, or healing. It does not have to relate to family history, nor are the processes always related to the family of origin.

Continue Reading