Relationships Articles

Navigating Love in a Relationcanoe

Thursday, November 20th, 2014

Navigating Love in a Relationcanoe

What sets a canoeing expedition apart is that it purifies you more rapidly and inescapably than any other travel. - Pierre Elliott Trudeau

If we’re going to travel lighter toward each other in love, it’s time to change a heavy-duty word. If ever there was a tired, stodgy, lifeless word, it’s “relationship.” Who decided it was a ship in the first place? A ship is a huge, weighty vessel with lots of cargo and a big responsibility to its passengers; not easy to turn around.

What I Wish You Understood About My Depression

Thursday, November 20th, 2014

What I Wish You Understood About My DepressionThere are many persistent misconceptions about depression. For instance, people assume depression is synonymous with sadness. (It’s not.)

They also assume that individuals with depression can simply snap out of it. (They can’t. Mild depression may abate with exercise, meditation and other self-help strategies. But most people’s clinical depression usually requires treatment.)

Such misconceptions can lead us to misinterpret what people need. It can lead us to make insensitive comments — “are you sure you want to get better?” — and to be dismissive of a disease that is actually devastating and really hard.

We asked people who have or had depression to share what they wish others knew and understood about the illness.

Raised to Be a Pleaser

Wednesday, November 19th, 2014

Raised to be a PleaserDo you have a strong need for approval from others? Do you have difficulty saying no, yet often feel resentful about what you agreed to do? Do you get overly involved with people’s problems, postponing attention to your own?

Try to please everyone and it’s likely you’re operating on overload.

Til Death Do Us Part: Coping with Commitment after Death

Monday, November 17th, 2014

Marriage May Lower Risk of Heart Attack SS

Are we still married after the death of one partner? “Til death do us part” is a part of all traditional marriage ceremonies, but I can’t help but wonder if it is really true. Do our vows — and our relationships — really end at death? Do we really “part” from those we love the most?

I can understand that our faithful, monogamous obligation may come to a completion at death, but I am not so sure much else comes to a sudden halt.

Single? Here Are 9 Ways to Enrich Your Own Life!

Monday, November 17th, 2014

single-holidays-pumpkin

Just because you choose to live a single life doesn’t mean you have to feel alone!

There are a lot of reasons to remain single these days, and many women are happy to do so. Unfortunately, other people often view single women with pity or misunderstanding. They think single women sit home every night eating Ben and Jerry’s by the gallon, feeling lonely and miserable.

But studies show that single people actually have more active lives than married people; they’re more likely to go out, be involved in their communities, join groups, have more friends and be more social!

5 Ways to Prepare for a Difficult Conversation

Saturday, November 15th, 2014

5 Ways to Prepare for a Difficult ConversationDifficult conversations are hard. They create the potential for conflict and conflict can be tough to confront.

A little while ago, I knew I had to have a difficult conversation with an old friend. I needed to obtain a sense of closure and clarity from what was rocky emotional terrain.Needless to say, I took my time mentally preparing for such a discussion and compiled some suggestions that may help the process along.

Ghosting: I Never Heard From Him Again

Saturday, November 15th, 2014

Ghosting: I Never Heard From Him AgainMore than a decade ago, Carrie Bradshaw was on the receiving end of a modern break-up — on a post-it note.

Nowadays, people don’t even bother with writing something on a piece of paper. Now you’ll get a text, and that will be it. The end of your relationship — and perhaps the end of any further communication with your ex-partner.

If it was wrong a decade ago to break up with someone on something so impersonal as to disrespect the relationship, how much more wrong has it become to act as though the relationship never even existed?

Welcome to 2014 and “ghosting” — ending a relationship with zero explanation… and zero communication.

How to Support & Help Someone with Depression

Friday, November 14th, 2014

How to Support & Help Someone with Depression  Someone you know is struggling with depression. You want to help but you’re not sure how. You worry about saying the wrong thing, or doing the wrong thing. Or maybe you’ve already done or said the wrong thing.

There may be many reasons you’re having a hard time helping your loved one. But there also are many ways you can help.

Offer “love and kindness, first and foremost,” said writer Alexa Winchell. “Be kind to those of us suffering just as you would care for someone with the flu,” said Lisa Keith, PsyD, an assistant professor of special education at Fresno Pacific University.

What does this look like?

Below, you’ll find specific insights into the helpful — and unhelpful — ways you can be supportive from people who had or have depression.

9 Quotes about Life from ‘Garden State’

Thursday, November 13th, 2014

9 Quotes about Life from Garden State“Garden State” is a comedy-drama movie featuring Zach Braff and Natalie Portman that captures the state of transition young adults experience in a refreshing light. The narrative features psychological undertones.

Andrew Largeman (Braff) has been medicated since he was 10 years old, resulting in his emotional detachment. He is simply going through the motions of day-to-day life. Sam, a vivacious 20-something with problems of her own, inspires Andrew to start really living.

Following are some thought-provoking quotes from the film (along with my own interpretations).

7 Signs Your Workplace is Toxic

Thursday, November 13th, 2014

toxic office

For many people, the office can feel like a second home. You spend the majority of your waking hours there and your co-workers may likely be the people you interact with most in your life, after family or a spouse.

If you’re not happy with your work environment, that dissatisfaction can carry over into your personal life, damaging everything from your self-esteem to your friendships. Toxic workplaces also can have an impact on your health: the increased stress of working in a dysfunctional office can lead to job burnout, fatigue, listlessness, and depression.

If any of the above symptoms ring a bell with you, it’s time to take stock of the dysfunction in your workplace in order to evaluate if the situation is fixable — or decide if it’s time to move on with your career.

How to Remain Calm in a Trying Situation

Thursday, November 13th, 2014

How to Remain Calm in a Trying SituationI’ve had my fair share of overwhelming times. There have been times where I’ve been so thrown back in my chair that I had to excuse myself from the situation to get a grip on things. If it wasn’t anxiety it was a punch to the gut as some sort of veiled insult or rejection. These things can happen often and it takes skill not to let them get the best of you.

Just yesterday I was hanging out with a girl I liked and she mentioned that she had a new boyfriend. That may seem trivial, and it probably is, but I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t taken aback. I’ve learned (with a lot of practice, though) to just roll with the punches. I don’t let trivialities get to me much anymore and I think it’s a skill that could benefit everyone.

10 Questions to Avoid Passive-Aggressive Co-Parenting

Wednesday, November 12th, 2014

Teenage girl in trouble with parents

Your child is hears (and feels) all of those subtle pot-shots you take at your ex.

Everyone knows the basics of co-parenting: stay kid-focused, don’t use your kids as messengers, never use your kids as scapegoats, show up on time, and don’t talk negatively about your ex in front of your kids. It all seems pretty straight-forward and doable — at least it does on the surface.

But real-life isn’t lived on the surface and sometimes, in all of that “trying” to be nice, you’re actually just being passive-aggressive and probably doing more harm than good. Most of the time it’s pretty obvious whether or not you’re taking care of the basics. You know if you’re staying kid-focused, or using your kids as messengers or scapegoats, or showing up on time, but what might not be as obvious is whether you’re putting out more toxic energy and negativity about your ex in front of your children than you realize.

Recent Comments
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