Have you tried to lose weight? 

More than one third of U.S. adults currently are obese, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. Physicians and other health care professionals urge us to lose weight or risk becoming vulnerable to a host of diseases, including diabetes, high blood pressure and heart disease. Weight loss has become a national conversation.

On an individual basis, most of us either have tried to lose weight or are actively engaged in maintaining a healthy weight.  Why we struggle with weight and how best to lose weight are hotly debated topics.  The nation’s current weight struggles have been attributed to a range of biological, societal and personal problems such as unhealthy school lunches, media advertising, too much corn and corn syrup in our diets, sugar substitutes, lack of willpower, overreliance on fast and prepackaged foods and many more.

But what gets in the way of your ability to lose weight?

Do you fly off the handle for “no reason”? Have you been accused of being “hot-headed”? When the emotional intensity and severity of your behavior doesn’t match the situation at hand, you are overreacting.

There are two kinds of overreactions: external and internal. External overreactions are visible responses that others can see (for example, lashing out in anger, throwing your hands up and walking away from a situation).  Internal overreactions are emotional responses that remain inside of you that others may or may not be aware of.  Examples of internal overreactions are replaying a situation over and over in your head, wondering if you said the right thing, or overanalyzing a comment made by a friend or loved one.

In her book Stop Overreacting: Effective Strategies for Calming Your Emotions, author Dr. Judith P. Siegel suggests asking yourself the following questions to assess whether you have a problem with overreacting.

We get this question all the time — how do you choose a therapist? How do you know it’s the right psychotherapist for you?

In this …

There are a lot of misconceptions about psychotherapy. What is it? What is it not? How do you pick the type of psychotherapy that’s right …

Medication is highly effective for treating ADHD. But it can’t teach you skills for living successfully with the disorder. And it can’t help you overcome common co-occurring concerns such as low self-esteem. That’s where psychotherapy comes in.

Psychotherapy targets specific ADHD symptoms that interfere with daily life, such as disorganization, distractibility and impulsivity. It helps you better understand your ADHD and improve all areas of your life, including home, work and relationships.

But not all therapists are created equal. That’s why it’s important to do your research, and be selective. Below, two ADHD experts share their tips on finding a good clinician.

Psychology has been rooted in self-exploration for individuals seeking help with mental health issues …

What used to be thought of as normal grieving, a sensitive personality or an emotional reaction to an unanticipated situation seems to become more and more routinely viewed as a “mental disorder.”

Once diagnosed, treatment often consists of nothing more than pill prescribing.

Sometimes responses to ordinary life events can be incorrectly diagnosed as mental disorders. Let’s look at a few examples…

“My husband passed away almost a year ago and I still miss him so much. There are times I feel like there’s not much purpose to my life anymore. We were married for 42 years. It’s tough to fall asleep without him at my side. And it’s tough for me to feel like cooking when I have to eat alone.”

This is a normal bereavement reaction. The proposed new Diagnostic and Statistical Manual code, however, states that these may be signs of a major depressive episode. Why? It’s as though our standard for bereavement is now quick, like everything else in our lives. Nothing to it! A piece of cake! Okay, mourn. But return to your old life in a week, a month, three months. You need more time than that? Well, perhaps you should take anti-depressants. Good for the drug companies. Not good for the bereaved individual.

Even today, between work and home, women have a lot to juggle. “Though in recent years, men have been more hands-on with household and childcare responsibilities, the bulk of the work still, for many, lands on the woman’s shoulders,” said Terry Matlen, ACSW, a psychotherapist and author of Survival Tips for Women with ADHD.

Whether you have kids or not, balancing a slew of commitments can get overwhelming for women with ADHD, said Stephanie Sarkis, Ph.D, a psychotherapist and author of several books on ADHD, including 10 Simple Solutions to Adult ADD. That’s because the nature of ADHD makes it tougher to prioritize and schedule, she said.

And, unfortunately, it’s common for women with ADHD to beat themselves up for not getting things done. Many women feel incapable and struggle with low self-esteem, Matlen said. “Women with ADHD are well aware of their shortcomings, but often they don’t understand [them] in the context of their ADHD brain.”

Here, Matlen and Sarkis, who both have ADHD, offer their tips for coping with overwhelm when you have the disorder.

An anxiety disorder is much more than being very nervous or edgy.

An anxious person will report an unreasonable exaggeration of threats, repetitive negative thinking, hyper-arousal, and a strong identification with fear. The fight-or-flight response kicks into overdrive.

Anxiety is also known for producing noticeable physical symptoms, such as rapid heartbeat, high blood pressure, and digestive problems. In General Anxiety Disorder (GAD) and Social Anxiety Disorder (SAD) the symptoms become so severe that normal daily functioning becomes impossible.

Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) is a common treatment for anxiety disorders. Cognitive-behavioral therapy theorizes that in anxiety disorders, the patient overestimates the danger of disruptive events in his life, and underestimates his ability to cope. CBT attempts to replace maladaptive thinking by examining the patient’s distorted thinking and resetting the fight-or-flight response with more reasonable, accurate ones. The anxious person and the therapist work to actively change thought patterns.

In contrast, instead of changing thoughts, mindfulness-based therapies (MBTs) seek to change the relationship between the anxious person and his or her thoughts.

Traditional psychotherapy focuses on helping clients through symptom reduction. This means that when the indicators for therapy fade away, the therapy is considered successful.

But there is a new perspective emerging as to what psychotherapy can offer. Positive psychotherapy (PPT) is a strengths-based approach that is directly aimed at offering a more comprehensive perspective of a client and his or her life circumstances. It is becoming known as an evidence-based standpoint that explores both strengths and weaknesses to achieve greater well-being and functioning.

We are moving from looking at what is wrong to looking at what is strong.

“Everything that we see is a shadow cast by that which we do not see.”

This is one of my favorite Dr. Martin Luther King quotes. It is remarkable, in part, because it was penned by a man whose vision for a more equitable society continues to illuminate the dark corners of racism and injustice 45 years after his death.

Yet he could also write about shadows, those things that are hidden, and those things that are unknown to us.

The places of unknowingness, those times when we cannot see — they are crucial to the practice of psychotherapy.

Depression and low self-esteem often go hand-in-hand. Low self-esteem leaves individuals vulnerable to depression. Depression batters self-esteem. *

“Depression often distorts thinking, making a once-confident person feel insecure, negative and self-loathing,” said Deborah Serani, Psy.D, a clinical psychologist and author of the book Living with Depression. 

Past positive or neutral thoughts become “I am incompetent,” “I suck at everything,” or “I hate myself,’” according to clinical psychologist Dean Parker, Ph.D.

(On the other hand, “High self-esteem is associated with certain positive cognitions or beliefs, such as ‘I am good,’ ‘I am a success,’ [or] ‘I am valuable to others,’” he said.)

While low self-esteem may be deeply rooted, you can start chipping away at the layers of loathing. Each day, you can engage in an activity that improves your self-esteem. Below, Serani and Parker share their tips on strengthening self-esteem, whether it’s in the moment or over time.