General

Unloneliness

Does loneliness have an antonym? A word that is the opposite in meaning? Thesaurus.com has a few suggestions: the obvious being “unlonely,” and debateably, “loved.”

The world has in common loneliness, but not all the people who are lonely are unloved. There are the lonely people whom have themselves stood still behind the world, fiercely protective and bonded to their solitude, but are yet quick to blame the world they deny for their isolation. They have never known anyone to trust, nor kindness, and they are unable to recognize trustworthiness and kindness when they receive it; it makes them greedy, hungry to be loved, but also suspicious of just that all at once.

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Brain and Behavior

Vulnerability Practice

Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the little voice at the end of the day that says I'll try again tomorrow. ~ Mary Anne Rademacher

This quote speaks more clearly to me than any other of the mistake we sometimes make when we glorify achievement, striving and courage. And vulnerability.

In our “just do it” culture, we often push aside our needs, our low energy levels, our unhealed, raw vulnerability and force ourselves onward “no matter what.”

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Mindful Listening and Body Language

"The most precious gift we can offer anyone is our attention. When mindfulness embraces those we love, they will bloom like flowers." ~ Thich Nhat Hanh
Interviewing Stanford University Cultivating Compassion Training facilitators Margaret Cullen and Erika Rosenberg about their experience of motherhood for my mindfulness4mothers program was a restorative process in itself.

Even after two full days of leading us in a discovery of the power of compassion and kindness toward ourselves and others, they were able to listen with gentle care and interest.

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Brain and Behavior

Getting to Know Your 3 Brains: Part 4


Read more about getting to know your three brains: Part 1, Part 2, and Part 3.

The word “trigger” refers to anything that sets off the three brains to the point where you become aware of a thought, feeling or body sensation. In the exercise from the last post, you brought up a memory that “triggered” a feeling, thought or physical sensation. In other words, the memory evoked some experience for you.

Triggers can be external or internal. External triggers originate from our surroundings. An example of an external trigger is my mother’s criticism. As a result of her judging my outfit, let’s say, I am triggered to experience anger, sadness or shame. Since my mother is in the environment, this is an external trigger.

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Family

How to Really Get Away on a Family Vacation

It’s summertime, vacation season for many American families. But it’s not always that easy to leave the office, home and other responsibilities behind. While the relaxation experts may have a different view, here are some ways I've found to be effective in leaving it all behind.

Keep things simple.

Vacations are supposed to be restorative, a time to rest, relax and regain your balance and perspective. They’re not meant to be a nonstop schedule of attractions, cramming too many activities into a time that you’ve allocated to be with the family.

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Brain and Behavior

Warning Signs of Perfectionism (and How to Fix Them)

Perfectionists believe that there is no such thing as “good enough.” There is either “fail” or “don’t fail.” The concept of success is irrelevant because “success” is based on others' validation and is something to be chased but never realized.

Perfectionists never feel successful because there is always more to be done, more to be improved, more to “fix.” Because of this, they are often paralyzed by inaction or too much action.

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Brain and Behavior

Psychology Around the Net: September 3, 2016


Here in the U.S., we're currently in the throes of Labor Day Weekend (and I'm at a local music and arts festival, celebrating!).

Labor Day is the first Monday of September, and although it gives us a nice little three-day weekend, it's about much more than that: Labor Day honors our country's labor movement and "constitutes a yearly national tribute to the contributions workers have made to the strength, prosperity, and well-being of our country."

So, Happy Labor Day! I hope you're doing something to celebrate all your hard work and, once you get a chance, check out this week's latest in how your mood affects whether you live in the moment or the future, the new warning labels regarding opioid use with other medications, what your choice between iPhones and Androids says about your personality, and more!

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Caregivers

What Did Your Parents Teach You?

What teachings did your parents offer you in your childhood and teen years? Be mindful as you answer that question of the spoken and unspoken teachings and messages that were given to you and what you received.

Let us first consider the spoken teachings from your parents or primary caregivers. The elements necessary to parent a child well are multi-faceted and require consistent love and effort on the parents' part. The parents' attitude and energy level also must be considered. The parents' history and background are factors in how well or effectively they teach by word and example.

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ADHD and ADD

If You Don’t Have One True Calling, That’s a Good Thing — Here’s Why

One of the most significant generational differences between millennials and older members of the workforce is the contrasting mindset around career path.

Not so long ago, the average employee joined a company straight out of college, worked his or her way up from entry level to middle ground, and eventually joined the upper echelons of management, hardly stopping to give other employers a second glance. There was a much more linear development of career growth, which also included now-mythical concepts such as pensions and six weeks of accrued paid time off.
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Depression

Words of Hope for Anyone Struggling with Depression

One of the worst parts about depression -- and there are certainly many -- is that it robs you of hope. Hope that you’ll actually feel better. Hope that the darkness will lift. Hope that the emptiness will fill up and you’ll feel motivated and excited. Hope that it won’t be like this forever. Hope that you’ll get through it.

“I’ve been struggling with depression for almost 35 years,” said Douglas Cootey, who pens the award-winning blog
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Celebrities

The Psychology of Donald Trump & How He Speaks

Donald J. Trump will go down in American history as one of the most unusual politicians of all time. He is an enigma to everyone in the political establishment (and to much of America) as he continues his 2016 run for the American presidency.

What makes this Republican nominee tick? Why does Donald Trump speak the way he does, saying clearly outlandish things, then taking them back a day or two later? Let's find out.

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