Psychology Articles

3 Rules for a Positive Transformation

Monday, February 16th, 2015

Change Your Mindset, Find True Love

Things do not change; we change.
– Henry David Thoreau

At the core of positive psychology is the research on intentional activities. The effectiveness of deliberate positive interventions has created a platform from which many people are transforming their lives for the better. Purposeful, conscious activities — such as committing acts of kindness, expressing gratitude, and reviewing the good things happening in your day — have an additive effect. The more we do, the better we feel, and the more we seek intentional activities to supplement these good feelings.

Barbara Fredrickson, one of the leading researchers in the field, coined this progression “broaden and build.” Intentional activities run the gamut: meditation, exercise, expressive writing, or the proverbial “count your blessings.” Researchers and applied practitioners are constantly seeking new interventions to add to our emotional piggybank.

Are You an Empathizer or an Instigator?

Sunday, February 15th, 2015

effective-communication

The single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place. — George Bernard Shaw

Statistically, about 50 percent of all people are Empathizer communicators and 50 percent are Instigators. Neither type is better or worse, they’re just different. Learning your own and your opposite communicator type will allow you to adopt the strengths of your opposite, see situations from your talk partner’s perspective, and become a more flexible, positive, and responsive communicator. So, which one are you?

When You and Your Partner Fight

Saturday, February 14th, 2015

Why Fighting With Your Spouse Might Save Your MarriageIt’s an inescapable truth that you and your partner will argue or fight. Often in therapy, I see that couples are unable to resolve a conflict, especially if it is regarding what renowned couples therapists Drs. John and Julie Gottman call “gridlock issues.”

When this happens, couples often argue, then one partner or both exhausts the argument until someone walks away from the fight. Other times, couples resolve the fight they are having, but not the underlying problem. This means the fight will happen again when one partner’s underlying problem resurfaces in a different argument.

The Scary Side of Sitting

Friday, February 13th, 2015

Young woman sitting on sofa with electronic padThere is a growing scientific consensus that the more time you spend sitting, the shorter and less healthy your life may be. Excessive sitting, such as at an office desk, in front of the TV, even driving while commuting can significantly affect your cardiovascular and metabolic function.

Your mental health is intricately connected to the amount of time you spend sitting. One study after another continues to reveal that your risk for depression soars the longer you are sedentary. Sitting also increases psychological distress, and decreases feelings of well-being, a problem that fortunately can be rectified.

The Benefits of Detaching from Technology

Thursday, February 12th, 2015

iPhoneEven though I’m a member of Generation Y, I will cling to non-smartphones until they become obsolete. But my cell phone is automatically encompassed in my daily routine.

Has a day gone by where I haven’t composed a text message? Not really. And the Internet is an integral part of my life, an undeniable dependency for work, recreation or contact.

“The Internet buzzes in the background of my life, comforting —  always there to entertain me, to feed me information, to connect me to my grid of friends and family and to writers I follow,” Lisa Shanahan wrote in her personal narrative about an ‘unplugged’ vacation with her husband.

Differences Between a Psychopath vs Sociopath

Thursday, February 12th, 2015

Differences Between a Psychopath vs Sociopath

Society has conspired with Hollywood to put two seemingly-sexy psychology terms into our collective consciousness — psychopath and sociopath. Psychopath and sociopath are pop psychology terms for what psychiatry calls an antisocial personality disorder. Today, these two terms are not really well-defined in the psychology research literature.

Nonetheless, there are some general differences between these two types of personality types, which we’ll talk about in this article.

Both types of personality have a pervasive pattern of disregard for the safety and rights of others. Deceit and manipulation are central features to both types of personality. And contrary to popular belief, a psychopath or sociopath is not necessarily violent.

The Cost of Being the Lead Dog

Wednesday, February 11th, 2015

upset businessmanLewis Grizzard once said, “If you’re not the lead dog, the view never changes.” What an inspiring, motivating quote! Or is it?

The direction words such as these take us depends on our lived experiences and perception of self. When my grandfather first gave me this quote on a desk ornament, I was immediately validated and inspired to be great. The cost comes, however, when our vision becomes fixated on being the lead dog, and blinds the rest of our experience.

How to Defuse an Argument

Wednesday, February 11th, 2015

holiday-controllers-critics-couple-arguingMost people become challenged and confronted on occasion by others who differ in their opinions and who desire and are determined to argue. This could be about almost anything and with almost anyone, including our most intimate partners, family members, social acquaintances or colleagues.

It is wise for both parties who enter into arguments to be able to defuse them and dissolve their anger toward each other in a relatively efficient and respectful manner. It is wise to cool down and become calmer so you can return to interacting civilly with the people you previously argued with.

Managing the Fear and Anxiety of the Unknown

Monday, February 9th, 2015

Best of Our Blogs: July 16, 2013Almost everybody worries about what will happen in the future. Remember that no one can predict the future with 100 percent certainty. Even if the thing that you are afraid of does happen, there are unpredictable circumstances and factors which can be used to your advantage.

For instance, let’s say at work that you miss the deadline for a project you have been working on for the last few months. Everything you feared is coming true. Suddenly, your boss comes to your office and tells you that the deadline is extended and that he forgot to tell you the day before. This unknown factor changes everything. Remember that we may be 99 percent correct in predicting the future, but all it takes is for that one percent to make a world of difference.

Why Do Therapists Charge So Much?

Monday, February 9th, 2015

therapist_negativeThe world can be a stressful place. You are feeling overwhelmed, and nothing seems to be working consistently. You’ve reached out to friends and family. They may have helped a little, but not enough. Perhaps friends or family are somehow associated with your stress, which leaves fewer people in whom to confide.

The day has come when you finally decide to seek help to get where you want to be. As you type “psychotherapist” into your search engine, you feel a strange mix of anxiety, apprehension, and determination. Next, you find someone who seems to be a good fit for what you hope to accomplish in therapy. Finally, you’ve gained the courage to call or meet with this so-called expert, who has brought you at least some relief through validation and, perhaps, recommendations. As you get to the end of the free consultation, you ask about fees.

Why Change is Difficult

Sunday, February 8th, 2015

woman in deep thoughtWe all want to improve our health, our wellness and our happiness. And in order to achieve our goals, we need to break bad habits and form good ones that actually stick. But despite our good intensions, we often fail to act on them. Even if we do, it rarely lasts.

There’s no doubt about it: change is hard. And no matter how hard we try to change, the comforts of eating sugary snacks, shopping and online surfing are difficult to resist. We try everything, but despite our unremitting effort to change, we return to our vices with greater voracity.

Why do we fail to break bad habits?

8 Ways You and Your Partner can Deal with Chronic Pain and Illness

Saturday, February 7th, 2015

oxytocin-love-hormone-pain

This is not a substitute for medical advice, nor is it meant as professional consultation with a mental health professional. If you have ongoing symptoms which interfere with your functioning, please seek appropriate help.

Disease is not sexy. Neither is chronic pain or illness. We shy away. We don’t want to talk about it. We hope if we ignore it, it’ll go away. But it won’t. We’re a culture obsessed with youth, beauty, vitality, wrinkle creams. We refuse to look death in the eye.

We’re aging everyday. It’s inevitable: we will get sick. With luck, it’s finite and you will recover. But what if you endure ill health every day? It’s unrelenting for years, no cure, little or no relief.

Recent Comments
  • Grace: Thank you! This was extremely helpful and encouraging. I appreciate you transforming your pain into a gift for...
  • Bipolar&BPD: I don’t know what to do anymore. I’m not only bipolar and have to deal with hypomania...
  • mark: hi everyone out there. believe me ‘SHIT HAPPENS”. ITS ALL ABOUT ‘REASON’ AGAINST...
  • Hurting in Vegas: I also have this crazy obsession with suicide. I have been abused sexually/physically and...
  • Dadisconcerned: My 12 yr old boy has ADD and has a big problem with waking and then getting himself together in the...
Subscribe to Our Weekly Newsletter


Find a Therapist
Enter ZIP or postal code



Users Online: 9465
Join Us Now!