Do you fly off the handle for “no reason”? Have you been accused of being “hot-headed”? When the emotional intensity and severity of your behavior doesn’t match the situation at hand, you are overreacting.

There are two kinds of overreactions: external and internal. External overreactions are visible responses that others can see (for example, lashing out in anger, throwing your hands up and walking away from a situation).  Internal overreactions are emotional responses that remain inside of you that others may or may not be aware of.  Examples of internal overreactions are replaying a situation over and over in your head, wondering if you said the right thing, or overanalyzing a comment made by a friend or loved one.

In her book Stop Overreacting: Effective Strategies for Calming Your Emotions, author Dr. Judith P. Siegel suggests asking yourself the following questions to assess whether you have a problem with overreacting.

Children are often asked to forgive: forgive his sibling for taking their toy; forgive Johnny for pulling her hair at recess; forgive Mom for being late.

When you ask your child to forgive — to say “okay” when someone has said they are “sorry” — does your child really understand what that means? Did they let go of the issue or are they repeating what you are telling them to say?

It is important for children to understand compassion, loving-kindness, and forgiveness. Teaching your child to forgive is an essential life tool that will make navigating childhood and adolescence easier. Holding on to anger and resentment is a recipe for anxiety and depression for children and adults. The earlier forgiveness is taught, the earlier you can prevent children from taking on the victim role. That in turn helps prevent anxiety and depression.

So how do you teach forgiveness?

Real men repress their emotions. Real men are self-reliant. Real men are aggressive and apathetic.

These are the messages we get about masculinity in our society. We get these messages from a variety of sources, including TV, film and computer and video games. And they come from a variety of people in our lives, including peers, parents and coaches, according to Ted Zeff, Ph.D, a psychologist and author of Raise An Emotionally Healthy Boy: Save Your Son From The Violent Boy Culture and The Strong Sensitive Boy: Help Your Son Become a Happy, Confident Man.

But these are false messages. And they can be detrimental, he said. Men are less likely to seek medical help. Repressing emotions can lead to health problems such as ulcers, high blood pressure and heart attacks, Zeff said.

This guest article from YourTango was written by Kelly P. Crossing.

We’ve all heard the same stories about divorce: the parent who does his best to badmouth his ex, the parent who tries to keep the kids away from the ex as some sort of punishment, the parent who manipulates child support payments. These things do happen and plenty of children are harmed because of these and other divorce-related mistakes.

On the other hand, many parents do divorce right. Lots of parents understand that divorce is terribly hard on their children. These parents try to minimize the trauma every step of the way.

Here are five divorce techniques parents get right…

When you think of your mother, does your heart open with compassion or tighten with resentment? Do you allow yourself to feel her tenderness and care? The way you take in her love can be similar to how you experience love from a partner.

What’s unresolved with your parents doesn’t automatically disappear. It serves as a template that forges your later relationships.

Maybe you’ve experienced this with a partner. If you felt you didn’t get enough from your mother, perhaps you also feel that you don’t get “enough” from your partner. It’s a harsh reality, but it’s true more often than not. The same holds true with your father: Your unresolved relationship with your father will also show up in your love life.

Ask the Therapists Marie Hartwell-Walker, Ed.D. and Daniel J. Tomasulo, Ph.D., TEP, MFA talk about children masturbating and engaging in other apparently-sexual activities at a …

Emotional abuse is elusive. Unlike physical abuse, the people doing it and receiving it may not even know it’s happening.

It can be more harmful than physical abuse because it can undermine what we think about ourselves. It can cripple all we are meant to be as we allow something untrue to define us. Emotional abuse can happen between parent and child, husband and wife, among relatives and between friends.

The abuser projects their words, attitudes or actions onto an unsuspecting victim usually because they themselves have not dealt with childhood wounds that are now causing them to harm others.

Did you know that simply watching TV causes harm to children? Well, that’s what the American Academy of Pediatrics would have you believe. And yet, here we are in the sixth decade since TV became popular, and we have not yet seen the end of the world based upon multiple generations that grew up with television as a mainstay.

The latest issue of Pediatrics has two studies — and a bonus editorial! — that suggests television viewing by children is associated with greater criminality and antisocial personality, and that a child’s behavior can be modified by simply changing what they’re watching.

Pediatrics is the mouthpiece for the American Academy of Pediatrics. And while it’s ostensibly an objective, scientific journal, it continually publishes weak research — especially on the effects of TV and children.

Let’s check out the latest…

“I noticed my teenage daughter stuffing her face with potato chips and I just remarked that she’s put on a few pounds lately and should lay off the junk food.”

“After my daughter introduced me to her new boyfriend and asked me what I thought of him, I just quietly replied, ‘I think you could do better.’ Batten down the hatches! The furor that followed lasted for months! Aren’t I allowed to say what I think?”

Yes, you are allowed to say what you think. But know that nothing a parent says is ever neutral. Though you may think you’re making a helpful observation — or simply expressing your opinion — in your child’s eyes (even with adult children), your critique is likely to be interpreted as an indictment of his or her being.

Wouldn’t it be great if people went out of their way to appreciate what you did right instead of berating you for what you did wrong? Wouldn’t it be fantastic if people nixed their insults, squelched their criticisms and, instead, supported and encouraged you? Before you interrupt my starry-eyed fantasy, let me enjoy my moment of reverie.

Okay, micro-vacation over. Back to reality, where people blame and criticize all the time — and that’s on their good days! On their bad days, they throw in insults, curses, ridicule and humiliation.

When you’re on the receiving end of such put-downs, how should you respond?

If you’re a parent, educator or someone who works with kids in some other capacity, you know how frustrating and challenging it can be when a child misbehaves.

At school, teachers face varying forms of misbehavior: A child may wander around the classroom when he is supposed to be working at his desk, or talk out of turn when she is supposed to raise her hand. 

Parents often confront issues such as siblings squabbling at dinnertime, or children whining or throwing tantrums when they don’t get their way.

Where do you go if your child’s teacher tells you your child has symptoms of attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD)? What if you see your child struggling in school?

It can be overwhelming if your child is not doing well academically, behaviorally or socially. However, there are professionals available to guide you through the process of finding a diagnosis and getting treatment.

Your pediatrician or family physician is one type of professional to approach for assistance. At the first visit, your physician most likely will get a complete academic, learning and activity history from you and your child. It would be helpful to bring information such as report cards and past evaluations.

If you have had the same physician for years, he may not take a full past medical history, while a new physician more than likely will take one. He or she will want to look for any neurological problems, hospital admissions, history of trauma, poisonings or prematurity as well as a developmental history (milestones such as walking and first word). The next step should be a complete physical exam, including a full neurological workup.