Men’s Issues Articles

Predicting Divorce: The Four Horsemen of the Apocalpyse

Sunday, July 6th, 2014

The Four Horsemen of the ApocalpyseThe beginning of a relationship is a lot like buying a new house. Everything seems terrific, and that initial excitement can last for weeks, months, or even years. But like any house that isn’t taken care of, eventually your relationship may start to fall apart, leaving you wondering where it all went wrong.

Just as you can take regular care of your house in order to prevent it from falling apart, the same is true for your relationship. John Gottman, renowned relationship expert, discovered four markers of relationship failure with 93 percent accuracy in predicting divorce. These four indicators, also known as the four horsemen, are criticism, defensiveness, contempt, and stonewalling.

One-Night Stands: 5 Shocking Facts About the Science of Hooking Up

Monday, June 16th, 2014

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See the surprising ways your brain (and your hips) play a role in your casual sex encounters.

It’s a familiar scene: a thriving nightlife, a club or maybe a wine bar where glasses are clinking and singles are mingling before drifting off into the shadows — two by two. It’s not the perfect picture of romance, but when you’re caught up in the moment, a warm body feels like a fair substitute for love, right?

Hooking up is just a reality of the dating scene. But since when did the hookup scene become the place to find love? While you may think you’re just living the carefree single life, your brain is influencing your decisions more than you might want to admit.

Amazing Dads

Sunday, June 15th, 2014

Amazing DadsIn most families, yesteryear’s dad had one major role. He had to go to work and support his family financially. Secondarily, he was brought in for major disciplinary action (“wait till your father gets home”).

No hugs, no kisses, no “I love you” was expected from Dad. Those tender moments, like every other aspect of parenting, were left to Mom. (In those days, she was not a stay-at-home mom, she was just Mom).

Oh, how different things are today. When it comes to parenting, men are no longer relegated to the sidelines. They are not bumbling, clueless dads.

3 Paths for a Hotter Sex Life

Tuesday, June 10th, 2014

3 Paths for a Hotter Sex LifeImproving your sex life means focusing on more than just the physical.

Has your sex life dwindled from a hot, steamy affair to a lukewarm, occasional romp in the bedroom? You’re not alone. Many couples worry that their relationship is losing its original flair when the physical fun begins to simmer down.

While this may mean that your relationship is deepening into a new phase, a healthy sex life certainly goes a long way in terms of keeping partners connected. So how do you maintain it?

3 Ways Marriage Counseling Can Help Your Relationship

Saturday, May 3rd, 2014

3 Ways Marriage Counseling Helps Your RelationshipRecently, an otherwise happily married couple found themselves in the midst of some difficult communication problems.

According to him, he can’t talk to her about important relationship issues that arise, so they never resolve them. She thinks that she simply gets over issues faster than he does and talking rarely works anyway, so what’s the point? They were headed straight for an impasse.

Before too long, they both realized things couldn’t continue like this. Together, they decided it was time to see a marriage counselor.

Dealing with Betrayal

Saturday, April 12th, 2014

Betrayal_by_endintearsBetrayal is one of the most painful human experiences. Discovering that someone we trusted has deeply hurt us pulls the reality rug from under us.

When we see the word “betrayal” we may immediately think “affair.” But betrayal comes in many forms. Abandonment, vicious gossip, and spreading lies also may be experienced as betrayal.

Is it Good to Be Bad in the Workplace?

Thursday, April 10th, 2014

Is it Good to Be Bad in the Workplace?In recent years there has been a growing examination of the dark side of personality. Researchers have begun to appreciate the role played by socially undesirable traits.

In fact, recent research has taken an interesting slant, examining the way in which dark traits actually can be advantageous. The book Snakes in Suits is an excellent example. It argues that psychopathy can in fact help executives get ahead by making them ruthless, charming and impulsive. Indeed, we have previously discussed how agreeableness can be a hindrance in business.

Invisible Victims: When Men Are Abused

Wednesday, April 9th, 2014

Invisible Victims: When Men Are AbusedIn cases of domestic abuse throughout the world, the stereotype involves a man abusing a woman. For some, however, the story goes the other way around.

In figures quoted by HelpGuide.org, approximately one in three abuse victims are male. That’s 33 percent — a startlingly high number.

Men usually are blamed for abuse because of modern gender stereotypes. Women are perceived as the weaker, gentler sex, whereas men are perceived as being stronger and having natural tendencies toward violence. These stereotypes are false.

Meeting Strangers: How Passing Connections Enrich Our Lives

Wednesday, March 26th, 2014

Connecting with StrangersA few weeks ago, my friend and I spent Friday night at the local bar, with one premise in mind: we wanted simply to meet and converse with our fellow humans. (Since I’m in my 20s and no longer in school, opportunities for meeting new people are a bit limited.)

I discovered that one guy, let’s call him John, works a corporate job but paints on the side, and I found out that his brother teaches English and loves the performing arts scene. They came out to celebrate and toast their friend, who just became a real, live lawyer.

The Psychology of Addictive Relationships

Monday, March 24th, 2014

The Psychology of Addictive RelationshipsLove addicts often have the best intentions. They desire to have happy, healthy relationships. However, underneath these good intentions lies a covert struggle with intimacy. With sex and love addiction, there is always a hidden agenda to get needs met that are based in feelings of insecurity.

When there is dysfunction in the family of origin, love objects are unconsciously sought out with the goal of replaying unfinished business from childhood.

It is not always a relationship with a parent that we are repeating; it can be a relationship with any family member that is unresolved. Mourning childhood losses and allowing oneself to process the pain of past hurt sets us free to select more positive relationships.

Why Men Don’t Ask for Directions

Sunday, March 23rd, 2014

Why Men Don't Ask for DirectionsWomen often find the male mind hard to understand. Why can’t men ask for directions when they are lost? Why can’t they read an instructional manual when they don’t know how to do something? Why can’t they pore over a self-help book on relationships when it can help them enhance their skills?

An old adage is that women are emotional and men are logical.

So how come men don’t operate rationally when they don’t know something?

How to Get Over a Verbally Abusive Relationship

Friday, March 21st, 2014

How to Get Over a Verbally Abusive RelationshipWhen a destructive, verbally abusive relationship ends, it’s normal to feel a host of conflicting and unresolved emotions.

Verbally abusive relationships can destroy your heart and soul and make you feel like a completely changed person. The recovery process takes time, support from others, patience and self-love — but you can get through it and emerge stronger, happier and healthier than you were before.

Cut All Ties with Your Ex

People who have ended abusive relationships often feel the need to contact their former partners. On some level, you know that you shouldn’t have any contact, yet you might feel compelled to show your ex that you’re better off — or you may feel the need to offer forgiveness. Yet it’s vital to cut off all contact.

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