Children and Teens

7 Ideas for Date Night When You Have to Stay in with Your Kids

Maybe your babysitter cancels. Maybe you’re trying to save money. Maybe you’re not ready to leave your baby. Maybe you don’t trust anyone else to watch your child. Maybe you’re too exhausted to leave the house. Maybe there’s some other reason. Either way, the end result is the same: You’ve got to stay home with your kids, and you’d like to spend some quality time with your partner.

“Nourishing your connection with your beloved is essential in your relationship and ultimately, your family thriving as a whole,” said Lily Zehner, EdD, MFT-C, a Denver-based therapist who specializes in sex, intimacy and relationships.

But date night doesn’t have to mean going out. As Zehner said, staying in “just gives you an opportunity to think outside the box.” Below are seven connection-strengthening, stay-at-home ideas.
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ADHD and ADD

Psychology Around the Net: July 23, 2016


AAAAAACHOOOOOO!

That's me, readers, sneezing my brains out as I type this. You might remember I mentioned being sick last week? Well, this week, allergies decided to fill the void my common cold left behind.

It's been a rough couple of weeks for me and, as a matter of fact, I'm going to stop here and leave you to peruse this week's latest news about psychiatry and eugenics, using mindfulness to launch your career, some interesting results related to the self-esteem of women around the world, and more, because I'm headed to my pharmacist.

(They're used to people looking like something the cat dragged in, right? RIGHT?!)

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Addiction

Understanding PTSD and its Effects on Marriage

Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) is a mental health condition that occurs following a life-threatening event such as military combat, natural disasters, terrorist incidents, serious accidents, or physical or sexual assault. Approximately eight percent of all people will experience PTSD at some point in their life. That number rises to about 30 percent for combat veterans.

Those suffering with PTSD may experience several different types of symptoms:

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Disorders

Are You Seeing a Good Therapist? 5 More Tell-Tale Signs

If you aren’t in the psychology field, it’s hard to know what you should expect from a therapist. After all, choosing a therapist is different from looking for a surgeon or chiropractor or dermatologist. Therapy is a unique process; one that requires you to be vulnerable. In fact, you might share things with your therapist that you’ve never shared with anyone.

So how do you know if the therapist you have or one who you’re considering is actually a good clinician?
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Children and Teens

7 Relationship Mistakes We Make in Front of Our Kids

If you're a parent, successfully raising your children is an important goal. Would it surprise you if I said there’s an even greater role to play? Cultivating a strong, healthy and harmonious relationship with your partner is even more critical than how you parent your kids.

According to psychologist John Gottman, “how healthy your relationship is with your partner determines the social, emotional and academic success of your child” (Gottman, Raising an Emotionally Intelligent Child). If you’re in an unhealthy relationship, over time your children will develop insecurities, parental dependence and lower intelligence scores.

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Family

M is for Marriage — Or Is It Money?

Money is a sensitive topic for most of us -- in dating and in marriage. Who isn’t at least a little bit weird about money, anyway? The topic seems filled with ambiguity lately, and a wealth (ahem) of possible answers.

How Do You View Money?

Early in our lives, we gain lasting ideas about money, mostly from our parents or parent figures. My own parents felt fortunate to have begun their New York City public school teaching careers during the Great Depression in the 1930’s, when people who’d lost everything and were jumping out of high office building windows or selling apples on the street.
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Disorders

Are You Seeing a Good Therapist? 5 Tell-Tale Signs

You find a therapist online or through your insurance. Or maybe a friend recommends them. Either way, you call and make your first appointment. You start seeing this therapist for 50-minute sessions once a week.

But how do you know if your therapist is actually good? It can be tough to tell because therapy can seem like a mysterious, cloaked process. We generally know what makes a good primary care physician or a good dentist. But what do good therapists say and act like?
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Caregivers

The Psychological Impact of Divorce on Adult Children

I recently viewed the 2013 comedy, "A.C.O.D," starring Adam Scott, Clark Duke, Richard Jenkins, and Catherine O’Hara. "A.C.O.D" showcases a serious storyline in a comedic light, while addressing the psychological impact divorce can have on adult children. While I can’t speak to such an experience firsthand, I was intrigued by the subject matter. Even though they’re no longer kids, adult children may still carry the weight of divorce and unresolved childhood issues on their shoulders.

Maybe such effects manifest in their romantic relationships. They may be wary of long-term commitment. Maybe they encounter heightened stress when they’re sifting through their parents’ leftover anger and resentment, still feeling as if they have to choose sides.

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General

Divorce and the Practice of Dating

Growing up, many of us learned to value and naturally imagine our futures. We fantasized about who we would become when we grew up. That included who our future mates may be and what they'd look like, and our role in caring for our imaginary children. Others fantasized about a life partner or a career while children and a family were not on the agenda. For some people, singlehood without parenthood was the path. Either way, we all hoped that when we married, our unions would be happy and perhaps lifelong ones.

Most of us, when we bond or pair with another, especially when exclusive and monogamous, want it to work. However, studies described by the American Psychological Association show that "marriage and divorce are both common experiences. In Western cultures, more than 90 percent of people marry by age 50. Healthy marriages are good for couples' mental and physical health. They are also good for children; growing up in a happy home protects children from mental, physical, educational and social problems. However, about 40 to 50 percent of married couples in the United States divorce. The divorce rate for subsequent marriages is even higher."

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Marriage and Divorce

5 Ways Stress Knocks Your Love Life Way Off Track


Your libido, appearance and more take a hit when you're feeling too overwhelmed.

If being stressed out of your mind didn't feel bad enough, there's a study that will make you want to chill the eff out even more. Researchers discovered that men find stressed out women less attractive.

After men rated women's faces for attractiveness, the study found that the prettiest faces consistently belonged to the women with the lowest levels of cortisol, the stress hormone. But don't let that make you worry any more, because women are actually guilty of the same thing. According to previous research, women don't go for anxious men either.

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General

An Easy Way to Guarantee Your Marriage

Before tying the knot -- or after, if you’re already married -- why not try out what could be the best way to keep your relationship on track as you journey through life together?

Regardless of life’s ups and downs, the two of you can continue to enjoy romance, intimacy, and teamwork. You’ll deal with issues constructively and usually arrive at win-win solutions.

My prescription for making such dreams come true: hold a weekly marriage meeting.
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