Brain and Behavior

The Daily Grind

Rise and grind. 5:58 a.m. You jolt up; the blaring alarm clock interrupts the morning stillness. Rousing yourself from your morning stupor, the ritual begins: a glance outside, dry toast with jelly, and a quick part of your thinning hair. Lingering in front of the mirror, your sunken eyes and ashen face stare back. Middle age looms; those carefree university days are receding like your hairline.

Before turning down Reminiscence Road, you remember that you have a 6:45 a.m. bus to catch. Boarding the bus, you nod at the driver and exchange glances with your dreary-eyed workaholics; most are staring into space or mumbling into their phones.

Continue Reading

Family

How to Curb a Smart Mouth

The tendency to shoot from the lip has doomed many an endeavor or personal interaction. If you are prone to speak first and think later, you could be missing out on opportunities. These tips can help to curb your impulsive blurts and make your life happier as a result.

Imagine you’re stepping off a cliff.

The next step you take could be momentous, or it could be disastrous. Before you open your mouth to say whatever pops into your head, think of the potential consequences or ramifications. This will give you a little time to edit your words before they’re spoken. Remember, you can’t take back what you said, so use your words wisely.

Continue Reading

Addiction

Psychology Around the Net: April 23, 2016


Earlier this week, a recently unemployed friend of mine began a round of several interviews for a new job that, if all goes well, potentially could be the perfect fit for him. During the first interview he was asked, "What is your strongest attribute and how would it benefit our company?"

My friend is a quick thinker and delivered an answer that, after talking about it later, we both decided indeed summed up his strongest attribute; however, the interviewer's question made us both start thinking more deeply about our attributes -- especially as they relate to employment and personal relationships.

Continue Reading

General

10 Lessons Failure Teaches

No one likes to fail. In fact, most people would do almost anything to avoid failure. They consider the lengths they have to resort to a fair price to pay -- just so they don’t have to go through the experience of failing. But they’re missing something incredibly valuable: They’re losing out on the lessons failure teaches.

You don’t always have to be right.
It may come as a bit of a shock to realize that you don’t always have to be right. In fact, if you think you always have to be right, you’re likely going to experience more than a few disappointments. The beauty of having failed is that it takes away some of the pressure of having to be right. You can forgive yourself for the failure and move on.

Continue Reading

Children and Teens

3 Hard Truths about Your Dream Job You Need to Accept

You’ve been told you can achieve anything you set your mind to, right? That’s the message that’s been ingrained in us since childhood when we imagined becoming astronauts, athletes, and movie stars. Most of us come to realize that we can’t all be LeBron James or Taylor Swift -- and that we don’t want to be, anyway! As we get older, we typically outgrow these fantasies of youth and begin mapping out a career that’s aligned with our personal goals and values.

Yet, in spite of this seemingly straightforward and logical process, many people still have a number of misconceptions about what a “
Continue Reading

General

Lost in Translation

“Matt, the project was due five minutes ago,” my harping boss nags.

“I am putting the finishing touches on it. It will be in your inbox momentarily,” I respond. I scan the PowerPoint presentation one last time and reluctantly click submit. The PowerPoint presentation is high-quality. With my exacting standards, I expect the highest quality.

My supervisor, a late 30ish woman, grumbles. She speaks the universal language of sighs, grunts, and slumping posture. I visualize her impatiently refreshing her inbox every three seconds.

Continue Reading

Disorders

Why Men Stay Away from Therapy — and Why It’s Actually a Perfect Match

A man went to see psychologist Ryan Howes solely because his wife wanted him to. She wanted him to work on his communication and become more comfortable with intimacy. He wanted to be anywhere but there.

Many men feel this way about therapy.* And many men avoid it -- even when they’re struggling and need it most. They often see attending therapy as a “sign of weakness or inadequacy,” said Jean Fitzpatrick, LP, a psychotherapist who has extensive experience working with both men and women and whose practice focuses on relationship and career issues. In particular, men over 50 tend to have a harder time being vulnerable and putting their feelings into words, she said.

Continue Reading

Brain and Behavior

Hit By a Wave of Depression: It’s Sink or Swim

The blue tidal wave crests, pummeling you with dreaded hypotheticals and faulty, circuitous logic. It is unrelenting, plunging you into a numbing despair. The resolve to fight is shelved; you are searching for any elixir to latch onto.

Dramatic? Sure. Accurate? Yes. Besieged by depression, the numbing pain hollows you. Hours turn into days and days turn into months. Some grimly press on; for others, the blue wave is incapacitating.

Continue Reading

General

Accepting Ourselves Without Labels

It feels good to know that other people are just like me, especially when I have been going through tough times. When I discover a group of people going through the same thing as I am, I am reassured and comforted.

Often these groups will have a way of identifying themselves and their experiences. I can go online and discover a labeled group for practically every emotion that I feel.

Anxious and depressed? There are groups for that. Hypochondria kicking in? Plenty of blogs for that. Feeling extra sensitive and introverted? There are communities for those labels too. Yoga phase has you feeling spiritual? Hop on Twitter and follow the hashtags. Upset from chronic digestive issues? Just look on Facebook.

Continue Reading

Anger

How to Achieve Mental Freedom

Living in a chaotic world can be a huge struggle when our external environment has more power than our internal selves.

There are different ways to determine if you are struggling to find a balance between your external and internal lives. Overthinking can be indicative of this struggle; external thoughts dominate your inner peace.

The internal locus of control drives us to actively fulfill the purpose we have set for ourselves. Feeling weak causes us to rely on external factors to dictate our drive. Ultimately, the problem is that we begin to live in a mental prison where we have little control over anything. And if the problem is mental prison then, consequently, the solution is mental freedom.

Continue Reading

Brain and Behavior

Is the Cure for the Common Cold Within Reach?

Handshakes, High Fives, Fist Bumps, And Hugs
“We need four hugs a day for survival. We need eight hugs a day for maintenance. We need twelve hugs a day for growth.” - Virginia Satir
In 2008 Barack Obama and his wife, Michelle, gave each other a fist bump after a well-received campaign speech in Minnesota. The gesture went viral. It became the new handshake. Now, according to some, it may be trending as a health initiative.
Continue Reading

Anger

3 Ways to Be More Assertive at Work – Without Being a Jerk

Have you ever admired a co-worker who’s able to navigate challenging situations with ease and professionalism, no matter the politics and difficult personalities involved? You know the type: She has a Teflon-like ability to deflect anger and frustration in the problem-solving process and doesn’t settle for an outcome that would sacrifice her self-respect or clout among colleagues.

What she’s exhibiting is a key personality attribute that’s important in both business and life: assertiveness. For those of us who avoid confrontation like the plague -- or, on the flipside, those of us who have hair-trigger tempers -- this calm-yet-effective, agreeable-yet-firm temperament seems superhuman. Assertiveness requires skill and can take time to cultivate, but it’s a quality you can (and should) aspire to master.

Continue Reading