Valentine’s Day isn’t just for lovers. It’s also a great time to acknowledge the amazing people in our lives.

As psychotherapist Ashley Eder, said,“The focus on romantic love at Valentine’s Day risks narrowing what could be a special celebration of the closeness we feel with many.”

So how can you show your appreciation to the people you love? “I believe that time and attention are the most coveted gifts,” said Mudita Rastogi, Ph.D, a licensed marriage and family therapist in Arlington Heights, Ill.

Here are several ways to do just that.

Another new year. With each new beginning, we look to ways we can reinvent ourselves. We clamor for ways to keep our resolutions.

But what if you put away the resolutions and just consider different ideas to help you live a better life. Not just this year, but throughout the year, any time. Here are eight such ideas.

1. Get an annual mental checkup.

What? What’s that? You go for a physical checkup. You get your eyes checked. Your teeth cleaned. Your auto inspected. Well, then, why are you leaving out the most precious part of you: your mind?

No, you’re not crazy. But your mind may not be in tip-top shape. How about fine-tuning your emotional responses? Refining your decision-making skills? Upgrading your communication skills? Enriching your relationships? A checkup every January can jump-start your New Year so that you reap the benefits all the rest of the months.

As soon as Halloween ends we are reminded that Christmas is creeping its way back into our lives. It always seems to arrive much too soon, doesn’t it? The month of November quickly feels as if it’s defined by December.

I’m not a huge fan of the holiday season. When I was 19, I worked in a grocery store. I’m pretty sure my relative disdain for the season started while working a cash register between aisles of Santa-shaped chocolates and overpriced eggnog. I tolerated the crowds of people who purchased produce and cookies and I smiled, my irritation level peaking each time I was asked if the store sold organic carrots.

The customer, after all, is always right.

But the dreadful repetition of Christmas music drove me to surrender my apron midway through December.

I’d like to take this moment to wish you and yours a very Merry …

According to the American Psychological Association, stress is on the rise in America, with nearly half of Americans reporting that stress is having a negative impact on their personal and professional lives.  Although the holidays can be a time of joy, they often bring with them additional stressors.

During the holidays we are often surrounded with images of people who are happy, in love and enjoying the whirlwind of their lives.  In reality, however, this time of year can be difficult.  When our lives don’t match the images we see around us or live up to our own ideals of family and friendship, it can be painful. And spreading all that good cheer, creating traditions and memories can be tiring and can exacerbate daily pressures and hassles.

The following tips are designed to help you find relaxation during this often-emotional time and to improve how you are thinking or feeling about the moment and the season.

This weekend, my daughters and I made our graham-cracker houses. As I write about in Happier at Home, every year, instead of traditional gingerbread houses, we make graham cracker houses, which are easier to build and decorate.

Every year — this also seems to be part of the tradition — I almost forget to organize the house-building, until it’s almost too late. But we’ve always managed to do it.

I learned how to make graham-cracker houses when my older daughter was in kindergarten; I was a parent helper when the children made them as part of a unit on “home.” (Coincidence? Or not?)

For me, one of the most important aspects of home is the celebration of traditions — like the building of these houses. Family traditions mark time in a happy way and give a sense both of anticipation and continuity.

After the tragic shooting in Newtown Connecticut last Friday, many have good reason to feel anguish, despair and misery.

These events touched many families personally. For those of us not directly affected, they can still leave us with feelings of horror and wanting to hold our loved ones near.

As a nation and as individuals, we could not possibly have anticipated or planned to have to deal with the emotional consequences of such an event. And yet here we are… many of us saddened, enraged and overwhelmed.

With every Christmas and holiday season, we find ourselves repeating the same old patterns, year after year.

You read well-intended columns, much like this one, that suggest, “Just don’t do this” and you’ll be fine. Of course, if all it took was pure will-power, I’d suspect there’d be a lot less need for therapists.

So instead of telling you things you should or shouldn’t do, I’m going to suggest some simple strategies for actually sticking to those other lists.

Ah, the holidays.

Everywhere you go, you face cookies, candy, booze, and snacks and treats of every kind. While this creates a festive atmosphere, it can also lead to a lot of anxiety and/or guilt in those of us trying to resist temptation.

As you think about how to handle holiday temptations, your strategy may depend on whether you’re a moderator or an abstainer when trying to resist temptation.

During the holidays, we often hear stories about how much people are shopping. In fact, you can’t turn on the news on Black Friday (or the Monday after, or the day after that, or the day after that…) without hearing about holiday shopping.

What you don’t hear enough about are the people who are down and out, in need of our help. Sure, it was great there was a 12-12-12 concert for victims of Hurricane Sandy. But what about everyday folks who just have fallen on temporary hard times?

That’s why The New York Times Neediest Cases Fund warms my heart. For the past 100 years, the Fund has provided direct assistance to children, families and the elderly in New York. Each day during the months of December and January, they highlight a story from their Fund. In a city of over 8 million people, it’s not hard to find people in need.

Today’s story is about a man who worked for over a decade as a home health aide, over 75 hours every two weeks. When he was most in need due to a kidney infection, however, he found his own health insurance wouldn’t cover his medical expenses. Which in turn sent him into a spiraling depression.

Around the holidays, therapists hear their clients voice versions …

Ah, the holidays: Candy canes, cozy slippers, festive lights, family peace, marital joy, and grateful children.

Or not.

The holidays are stressful. There are the challenges of too much family, not enough family, not enough money, continual exposure to food and alcohol, and perhaps worst of all, the gap between our actual life and our fantasy life. As if gazing into the perfect happy scene within a snowglobe, we might fall into a trance of how our life should be.

We might feel torn apart by nostalgia and grief over the good times and good people of the past, and wracked with guilt and inadequacy for failing to create a more wonderful life for ourselves. We might feel scared about our dissatisfaction and hypnotized by the promise of fulfillment just beyond the hard glass.

Addictive and codependent behaviors thrive during this season of fantasy.