Habits Articles

12 Steps to Knock Out that ‘Out of Control’ Feeling

Wednesday, March 11th, 2015


Get going! Life’s waiting for you.

It’s that time of year when many people resolve to make changes relating to everything from finance to fitness. Unfortunately, by February, a good majority of us will have settled (un)comfortably back into old habits and will find ourselves feeling just slightly more powerless against our ability to slay the dragons that stand between you and your best self.

If you’re like me and tired of seeing the same promise you made to yourself fall by the wayside, perhaps these tips might help.

Tips for Moms to Make Time for Themselves

Tuesday, March 10th, 2015

Study All New Moms Should be Screened for Postpartum DepressionMoms wear many hats and tackle a slew of responsibilities every day. Depending on your children’s ages and circumstances, you might do everything from dressing and feeding your kids to picking them up from school and helping with homework. Then there are the household chores to deal with, too.

In the midst of all these moments and tasks, there’s very little time for you — even though self-care is essential for our well-being.

4 Research-Based Ways to Make New Habits Stick

Monday, March 9th, 2015

When Physical Exercise Feels Just Like A Panic AttackEveryone knows change is hard. If you want to achieve your goals, you have to learn how to delay gratification, step out of your comfort zone and overcome resistance to change.

But what’s even harder is making change stick. Saying no to a cigarette. Keeping the pounds off. Ignoring that website. That’s the real challenge. Or is it?

You can make change stick by making it easier for yourself.

5 Ways to Create Joy Every Day

Sunday, March 8th, 2015

5 Ways to Create Joy Every DayJoy resides in the big moments of life: birthdays, weddings, romantic dinners, weeklong getaways. But it also resides in the tiny moments between waking up and eating breakfast. Between dinner and falling asleep to the sound of rain against your window. Between opening the door of your home and opening the door to your car.

Joy is present when we look up at the sky. When we hug our loved ones tightly, fully. When we read stories to our kids. When we create our own stories. When we nosh on our favorite meal. When we cuddle on the couch with our spouse. When we walk along the street and catch the scent of cinnamon from our favorite bakery. When we realize the miracle of everything our bodies do.

How to Eat Healthier Foods

Friday, March 6th, 2015

The Role of Personality & Psychology in Healthy EatingRegardless of whether you’re dieting or simply want to eat better, committing to a healthy, balanced diet is a habit we can all benefit from. We know eating well helps us maximize our productivity and minimize our chance of heart disease, among other things, but that doesn’t mean it’s easy. The difficulty lies in needing to resist temptation in order to achieve our goals.

Everyone has that one meal they can’t say no to. You’ve probably been there yourself. The more you try to resist your urge, the more it persists.

Getting Better by Understanding Your Depression

Friday, March 6th, 2015

4 Strategies to Help You to Bounce Back from AdversitySandy struggled with spells of depression her entire life. She’d be feeling OK, when suddenly, and seemingly out of nowhere, she’d get depressed again.

She’d lose interest in things she previously enjoyed. She’d lose motivation for performing daily tasks. She’d feel guilty and worthless. She’d withdraw from loved ones. She’d have a hard time getting out of bed. She’d stay home, eating and drinking too much, her depression deepening.

Which of These Four Stories Do You Tell Yourself about Money?

Thursday, March 5th, 2015

moneycoinsbillsPaul Sullivan wrote an interesting New York Times piece, “Stressed by Money? Get on the …

The Case for Worrying ‘Alone’

Wednesday, March 4th, 2015

alone in the bedCan sharing your worries with a friend help you problem-solve and be more productive? Psychiatrist Edward M. Hallowell recently wrote a book in which he explains that working out your worries with a friend could help eliminate distractions in life.

“Worrying alone does not have to be toxic, but it tends to become toxic because in isolation we lose perspective,” Hallowell told Science of Us blog. “We tend to globalize, catastrophize, when no one is there to act as a reality check. Our imaginations run wild.”

As a classic worrier, however, I have to caution anyone against heaping your worries on any one person too often.

How to Mindfully Navigate Technology in Today’s Wired World

Wednesday, March 4th, 2015

lamenting-allure-technologyIn 2012, writer Christina Crook gave up the Internet for 31 days. She disabled data on her smartphone and turned off email. She documented her “Internet fast” by writing a letter a day (by hand or using a typewriter) and mailing it to a friend. Her friend would then scan it and post it to the blog “Letters from a Luddite.”

According to Crook in her book The Joy of Missing Out: Finding Balance in a Wired World, “”I was tired of Facebook mediating my relationships and discontented with my compulsion to constantly check-in online. I knew the Internet was allowing me to emotionally disengage from myself and my loved ones. I was living in a constant state of information overload and a vacuum of joy. I had too much information and not enough wonder.”

Before and After: An Obliger Figures Out How To Exercise Regularly

Monday, March 2nd, 2015

HabitsRepeatFourOccasionally, I post an interesting before-and-after story submitted by a reader, about how he or she successfully changed a habit.  I love to hear people’s stories about habit change. We can all learn from each other. If you’d like to share your story, contact me here.

This week’s story comes from someone who wants to remain anonymous:

“Between my and my husband’s full-time jobs, work travel, and 2 young kids, I’ve often felt I had very limited time to exercise in the last few years. My favorite form of exercise is to run or hike outdoors with a good friend. I happily trained for and ran several marathons with friends before having kids. For the longest time I thought the ‘friend’ part of the equation was because I’m a fairly sociable person and often have to work alone.

5 Steps to Increase Motivation

Sunday, March 1st, 2015

runningI hear it all the time: “I’m not motivated.” For many of my clients, they are referring to not having the motivation to perform basic life responsibilities such as paying bills, cleaning the house, making calls, and taking care of their health.

When do they get motivated? When they are in the danger zone. A late fee motivates them to pay bills. When friends come over, or when the house is so disgusting they can’t take it, is when they get motivated to clean. They get motivated to make a call just minutes before a negative consequence, and motivated to take care of their health in times of sickness.

5 Mistakes So Many of Us Make When Navigating Anxiety

Saturday, February 28th, 2015

Don't Panic! 7 Ways To Overcome AnxietyEvery one of us experiences anxiety. And we can experience anxiety about anything in our lives. Anxiety expert Marni Goldberg’s clients struggle with everything from worrying about the future to feeling like they’re not good enough to being overwhelmed by daily demands.

Many of psychotherapist Tracy Tucker’s clients struggle with a fear of the unknown. Much of the anxiety couples therapist Christine Holding, LMFT, sees in her office has to do with abandonment, rejection and failure.

Maybe you can relate to experiencing the above fears. Or maybe your anxiety is of a different flavor.

Whatever your worries, you may be unwittingly approaching your anxiety in ways that actually increase it. Many of us do. Below are five unhelpful approaches and what can help instead.

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