If your loved one is struggling with depression, you may feel confused, frustrated and distraught yourself. Maybe you feel like you’re walking on eggshells because you’re afraid of upsetting them even more. Maybe you’re at such a loss that you’ve adopted the silent approach. Or maybe you keep giving your loved one advice, which they just aren’t taking.

Depression is an insidious, isolating disorder, which can sabotage relationships. And this can make not knowing how to help all the more confusing.

But your support is significant. And you can learn the various ways to best support your loved one. Below, Deborah Serani, PsyD, a psychologist who’s struggled with depression herself, shares nine valuable strategies.

Children, like all of us, continually experience loss. As much as they may celebrate their increased capacity to ‘do stuff’ like riding a bicycle or attending school, they also feel the loss of the special attention and privileges they had when they were younger and more dependent.

They feel loss when their family moves, when people in the family leave home, when pets die, when the boy or girl they like doesn’t like them, or when their best friend finds a new No. 1. They feel loss when holiday traditions change or vacations are suspended due to financial strain on the family. They feel loss when Grandpa can’t pick them up and twirl them around anymore, and when Grandpa dies.

Learning to grieve for losses great and small is a critical skill in a child’s healthy development. Children who do not learn to grieve are unequipped for life, as life and loss are indivisible.

Moms aren’t the only ones who struggle with postpartum depression. Dads struggle, too.

In this 2010 meta-analysis published in The Journal of the American Medical Association, researchers reviewed 43 studies with over 28,000 participants and found that 10 percent of men had prenatal or postpartum depression. That’s more than double the rate of men who suffer from depression in the general population — 4.8 percent.

Symptoms of Depression

In their book The Pregnancy & Postpartum Anxiety Workbook: Practical Skills to Help You Overcome Anxiety, Worry, Panic Attacks, Obsessions and Compulsions, authors Pamela S. Wiegartz, Ph.D, and Kevin L. Gyoerkoe, PsyD, note that depression can strike dads at any time, from their wife’s pregnancy to months after their child’s birth.

Symptoms of depression can include depressed mood; loss of interest in activities; fatigue; changes in sleep; changes in appetite or weight; difficulty concentrating or making decisions; feelings of guilt or worthlessness; and thoughts of death or suicide.

Men, however, may struggle with different symptoms. The lead author of the above meta-analysis, James Paulson, told Scientific American (in this piece by Katherine Harmon) that some researchers have called for a change in the diagnostic criteria because men tend to struggle with irritability, detachment and emotional withdrawal.

Kids are natural innovators with powerful imaginations. And creativity offers a bounty of intellectual, emotional and even health benefits.

One study found that kids’ imaginations helped them cope better with pain. Creativity also helps kids be more confident, develop social skills, and learn better. Below, three experts share how parents can encourage their kids’ creativity.

1. Designate a space for creating. Carving out a space where your child can be creative is important, said Pam Allyn, executive director of Lit World and Lit Life and the author of many books, including Your Child’s Writing Life: How to Inspire Confidence, Creativity, and Skill at Every Age.

But this doesn’t mean having a fancy playroom. It could be a tiny corner with a sack of LEGOs or a box of your old clothes for playing dress-up, she said. Allyn has seen creativity flourish in the most cramped spaces, including the slums of Kenya. The key is for your child to feel like they have power over their space, she said.

In A Lethal Inheritance: A Mother Discovers the Science Behind Three Generations of Mental Illness, science journalist Victoria Costello weaves the stories of her family’s mental illness with significant studies on genetics, early intervention and evidence-based treatment.

When Costello’s oldest son is diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia, she traces her family’s history of mental illness and makes some surprising discoveries — such as her grandfather’s well-guarded suicide.

A Lethal Inheritance is a must-read for anyone who’s been touched by mental illness, especially parents who feel helpless and hopeless. Costello shatters the myth that mental illness is a death sentence, along with countless other misconceptions.

She also recounts how she and her sons coped with their mental illness and achieved full recovery. And she does an excellent job of simplifying complex concepts and informing readers of the newest research.

Recently, when I was rereading Gertrude Stein’s The Autobiography of Alice B. Toklas, I was very struck by this observation about the French poet Guillaume Apollinaire:

The death of Guillaume Apollinaire at this time made a very serious difference to all his friends apart from their sorrow at his death. It was the moment just after the war when many things had changed and people naturally fell apart. Guillaume would have been a bond of union, he always had a quality of keeping people together, and now that he was gone everybody ceased to be friends.

The “quality of keeping people together” seems an important and rare attribute, and although it doesn’t come naturally to me, I’m trying to do a better job of it myself, and also to appreciate more the work of the Apollinaire-ish types whose efforts benefit me.

This quality has been on my mind since the sad occasion of a memorial service of a friend. I knew her in a work context, but at the service, I realized from the tributes of her college friends that, along with many other wonderful traits, she had the “quality of keeping people together” from that time.

My sister is this way, too, and from watching her in action, I know how much energy and time it takes to act like glue, to make the efforts that allow people to stay close.

Small talk. That smile. You are special. How sweet. Be mine. Love you. I am yours. Only you. Soul mate. True love. Marry me. Live happily ever after.

You got together with your life partner for many reasons: shared perspectives and outlooks, physical attraction, shared spirituality, shared professional lives, etc. But you also enjoyed one another’s company because it’s fun! In the beginning, you did not have much but each other, but it was enough. There were sweet words, long phone talks, walks and candlelit dinners. You had meaningful conversations, shared your dreams and goals, planned your future together.

What is your relationship like today? Does it still include fun times and romance? Or have you resorted to talking about and handling chores and responsibilities related to children, career and other duties of adult life?

I get a tremendous intellectual and emotional satisfaction when I hear someone give exactly the right answer to a difficult question. I was trying to remember some of my favorite examples of this kind of response, because just thinking about them makes me happy.

Here are four examples that sprang to mind.

1. My very favorite parenting book (its principles that apply equally to adults) is Faber and Mazlish’s How to Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk, and I also love their book, Siblings Without Rivalry. It has a terrific section about dealing with a child who says, “You love Joe more than me!”

Well, Christmas has passed and we are here, happy after all the celebration, wondering how 2012 will treat us and thinking deep inside “damn, I don’t want to go back to work…” with a sad feeling added.

Most of us were lucky and celebrated with family, friends or strangers, but I’m sure some of you didn’t. Some of you probably celebrated Christmas alone, perhaps watching TV, or that new film “New Year,” who knows…

The thing is that some people — maybe not you, but some people — like to spend Christmas alone. People change, so maybe next year you’ll want to.

Every day, every year, we spend most of our time working, studying, and taking too little time to relax and do things we like without being concerned for the consequences (which in most cases are nonexistent). People are like water balloons. You can keep filling them with water until they explode, or fill them to the top, and keep it stored that way: The balloon loses force on the elastic plastic and sometimes it breaks. In other words, people can stand a lot of bad things, and store bad feelings until a certain point, where they might explode. Of course, some people can stand more than others.

Theoretically, Christmas is a joyous occasion, but let’s face it — it can stress us out. Lots of presents to buy, too much food and alcohol consumed, and exercise ignored. For some it represents seeing people who have been avoided all year. Not surprisingly, calls for help to helplines and charities go through the roof during the holiday period.

This can lead to us feeling overwhelmed and unable to cope. It can prevent us from experiencing the extraordinary benefits of a holiday. We can be consumed by what isn’t rather than what is.

Imagine if it weren’t like that. Imagine if you returned to work in January full of zest and purpose. Here are a few proven, helpful strategies to do just that.

From time to time, we host live chats on Facebook and elsewhere (such as our weekly Q&A chat with myself held every Tuesday night from …

This guest article from YourTango was written by Kate Evans.

Relating to other people can feel like constantly walking across a minefield. Sometimes, we’ll notice that other people just don’t seem to want to be around us, or we’ll notice that we can’t get rid of the negative people in our lives.

You may also notice that you feel uncomfortable around someone and you can’t quite put your finger on why. This article will help you figure out some of the things that you or others might be doing that cross boundaries and get in the way of closeness in relationships.