Anger

The Myth of Negative Emotions

Emotions that provide us with unpleasant feelings have traditionally (and unfairly) been labelled “negative emotions.” People tend to want to avoid them, force them away, or silence them as soon as they emerge. They are the Rodney Dangerfield of emotions: they get no respect.

The truth is, there is no such thing as a negative emotion, since each emotion has its own role and purpose. In fact, in the book, The Upside of Your Dark Side, authors Todd Kashdan, Ph.D., and Robert Biswas-Diener argue that in order to attain happiness, one has to welcome every emotion (pleasant or unpleasant) and learn how to make the best of them. It is not the emotion that is problematic but rather the way we deal with them that can be. Instead of pushing these emotions away, we should learn to welcome and listen to the important messages these feelings are trying to communicate to us.
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Anger

Daddy Dearest: When the Father-Son Bond Just Isn’t There

Golfing buddies, hiking pals, math tutor, and your hero-in-chief. Or not.

I grew up with an emotionally distant father. His parenting style: disinterested with a minor in disdain. There was an aloofness, even coldness.

I vowed to be different than Dad. And I am. But then, innocuously enough, I mutter one of his pithy sayings. Those thoughts, sensations, feelings overflow. I stew, ruminating on the frayed relationship.

Entering adulthood, my father’s detachment gnaws. The demeaning comments rankle; the coolness stings. When Mom (RIP) was alive, her warmth compensated for Dad’s standoffishness.
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Anger

How to Handle Rejection Gracefully

I've been there. I’ve asked girls out on dates and they said no. I've asked for raises or applied for new jobs and have been shut down.

In each instance it’s important to remember to be graceful about how you handle the situation.

I realize it can be extremely hard to hear that something you had hoped for is not going to happen. But how you conduct yourself when you're faced with an ending that didn't go as you'd hoped shows what kind of character you have. Your behavior can set the stage for future encounters with employers or love interests.
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Anger

Psychology Around the Net: March 5, 2016


Happy March, sweet Psych Central readers! Only a few more weeks until the official start of spring here in the Northern Hemisphere, and while I have learned to appreciate all the seasons for what they offer, I'm excited to get back to some warmth and sunshine.

This week, I have a ton of news for you! For example, did you know Chris Stapleton's new hit "Fire Away" tries to foster mental health awareness? Or that control issues can contribute to road rage? What about how being a "hopeless romantic" is actually a good thing for your relationships?

Read on, and enjoy!

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Anger

How to Express Your Anger Effectively

When we’re angry, we yell, criticize, judge, shut down, give the silent treatment, isolate or say, “I’m fine!” (without of course being fine). These actions end up hurting both the other person and us. They feel bad, and we might feel worse. We might regret the insults and judgments we hurled their way. We might feel frustrated that we didn’t articulate the real reason behind our anger. We might feel frustrated that we weren’t heard.

Maybe we’re even afraid of anger in general because we associate it with aggression. But as Alexander L. Chapman, Ph.D, RPsych, and Kim L. Gratz, Ph.D, write in their comprehensive book, The Dialectical Behavior Therapy Workbook for Anger: Using DBT Mindfulness & Emotion Regulation Skills to Manage Anger, “Aggression involves actions or statements that might be harmful to someone or something, whereas anger is an emotional state.
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Anger

How to Combat Harmful Sarcasm and Negativity

When someone sends a little negativity your way, it might feel good to reflect it back at them. They should feel bad for raining on your parade, right?

“Your report isn’t ready yet? Seriously?” someone asks exasperatedly.

“No, it’s not ready,” you reply, “probably because I work twice as many accounts as you do.” Burn! Nice one!

But what becomes of a room when negativity gets thrown around left and right? The energy goes sour.
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Anger

Keeping a Balanced Body After Abuse

Recovering from trauma of abuse often means learning to be more in touch with the body. Victims of abuse have a tendency to dissociate. In order to cope with the trauma, the mind is removed from the present physical condition. The body becomes "not me."

Practicing self-compassion honors the feelings that surround the abuse. It can be an uncomfortable experience grappling with shame, guilt, resentment, hostility, or desire for retaliation. Unfortunately, we might turn to food or addictive substances to self-soothe. A healthier, long-term way to
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Anger

3 Ways Fighting Can Actually Help Your Relationship

Have it out! It's good for you.

There's something wholesome and good to be said for couples that never ever fight with each other -- I just don't know what it is. That hasn't been my experience so I really can't say whether that makes any particular love affair better.

My guess is that couples who never argue or have it out are probably building up a good head of steam inside themselves. Human nature -- even for the most zen among us -- seems to dictate that we speak our minds rather than bite our lips. The world doesn't move forward on the backs of lip biters.
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Anger

Re-Visioning Strength: What It Really Means to Be Strong and Why It’s Important


In this year’s election cycle, there is understandable anxiety about terrorism. Political candidates are competing to reassure voters that they are the strongest candidate and have the best plan for keeping us safe.

This raises some interesting psychological issues. How do we react when our sense of safety and well-being are threatened? What does it mean to be strong in the face of danger? What is a wise response to a difficult or scary situation?

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ADHD and ADD

ADHD and Parenting: Teaching Your Kids to Regulate Their Emotions

On the outside, when a child with ADHD is having an outburst, it might look like they’re misbehaving on purpose. They’re kicking, screaming, crying and throwing their toys. Or maybe it’s the opposite: They’ve completely shut down.

But there is nothing intentional about these behaviors. Kids don’t want to get angry or act out. “Their brains are actually wired to [over-react],” said Roberto Olivardia, Ph.D, a clinical psychologist who specializes in ADHD.
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Anger

What to Do When You Get Overwhelmed

Daily life is busy. There are constantly things that require our attention. Whether it’s work or family, there seem to always be things we need to do to keep everything together.

We are juggling numerous balls trying to maintain a balancing act on already-tenuous ground.

The point is, there comes a point in everyone’s life when things can get to be too much. We all get overwhelmed at times.
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