World of Psychology » Kara Ayers, PhD

Sandy Hook and Facebook: A Nation Grieves through Social Media

Kara Ayers, PhD — Sat, 15 Dec 2012 11:25:55 +0000

I learned of the tragedy at Sandy Hook Elementary School today as many of my fellow Americans did. Just through the door from a toddler gym class with my daughter, I scrolled through my Facebook feed to see a flood of posts like this:

“Deeply saddened and shocked. I have no words.”

“Heartbroken.”

“My heart goes out to the families.”

Nearly my entire feed – filled with friends and contacts from around the world – was posting about the same event.

Several years ago, I might have been confused but this isn’t the first horrible event I’ve learned about in this way. Like many of us, I’ve become somewhat accustomed to hearing such news first through social networking venues. I respond by immediately checking trusted news sources or calling a loved one. Social media has a unique way of bringing us back to so many original habits and behaviors.

As the day progressed, the steady flow of Sandy Hook statuses continued. Most statuses focused on the sheer sadness, grief, and immeasurable loss associated with losing so many precious lives.

The sentiments expressed through social media mirror many of the stages of grief initially discussed by Elizabeth Kübler-Ross. As people moved from disbelief and shock, expressions of anger related to this event began to pop up on my feed. Angry political outbursts and frustrations with the world at large were voiced. While it seems impossible to reach acceptance of such loss, people’s sentiments have also transformed into a sense of individual thankfulness and gratitude for their own loved ones.

Today, this has been captured by the thousands of posts from parents promising to hold their own children a little closer.

Social Media as a Grief Narrative

Facebook, Twitter, and other social media sites can serve as the world’s barometer for emotion. They can also be valid vehicles for grief. It’s not uncommon for people to desire to commune in response to the anxiety, despair, fear, and sadness elicited by tragedies.

Previous generations rushed to the homes of neighbors and churches after learning of the assassination of President John F. Kennedy. Many Americans today would have sought solace from the warm glow of a screen. The comparison isn’t intended to suggest a superiority of digital media over in-person comfort. Rather, it’s intended to illustrate that social media has expanded – not dramatically altered – the needs experienced by a nation in mourning.

Research also suggests that social media can positively contribute to the grieving process. Status updates, tweets, and blogs based on tragedies serve as communal grief narratives. Through telling and retelling stories, feelings, and interpretations of trauma, our minds and our society slowly heal.

Unique from typical grief narratives, social media posts often engage interactions through replies and comments. These posts can provide a much-needed connection to others who are also trying to understand. Tragedies elicit a need for relational anchors in our lives. We seek these anchors to secure what feels to be an unsettlingly unbalanced world. As mentioned in a recent article by Levitt, social media can be commended for facilitating a more open expression of grief for many people.

Whether etched in a condolence card, on a sign at a candlelight vigil, or in a Facebook post, grief remains a highly personalized and individual human expression. The stages of grief were described by Kübler-Ross as a series of ups and downs that began with shock or denial and ended with acceptance. As discussed by Psych Central’s John Grohol, there are now as nearly as many theories on grief as there are people who have experienced it.

Facebook, blogs, and social media hold positive potential to support a nation’s and a world’s need to cope with the immense tragedies of today and our future. As Höttges writes, sharing grief through social media can “reverse the unsharability of pain.” It can realign the poster or writer with the world.

There are no ways, no methods, and certainly no media that can allow any of us to “get over” the tragic loss of life experienced in Sandy Hook Elementary School. Talking about pain, grief, and mourning as a community is simply one way to attempt to realign our world.

Reference

Höttges, B. (2009). Blogging the pain: Grief in the time of the Internet. Gender Forum. Retrieved from http://www.genderforum.org/index.php?id=240.

5 Ways to Bust the Post-Election Blues

Kara Ayers, PhD — Mon, 12 Nov 2012 16:27:21 +0000

It’s nearly a week after America’s presidential election and much of the country is still abuzz with post-election analysis and political commentary. While many of us have experienced political overload, avoidance is not as easy as turning off the television or changing the radio station. Election aftermath continues to infiltrate social circles and take over conversations with family and friends.

Social networking interactions are far from the exception.

Whether your candidate won or lost, the close call of this race indicates at least some of your friends and family don’t share your reaction. This difference in opinion has spurred hateful Facebook memes, negative comments to loved ones, and outright social disputes.

Why are people still so angry about the election and what can you do to move forward?

The Psychology of Post-Election Frustration

As pointed out by Michele Zip of The Stir, it’s easy to be downright surprised by the hateful and angry responses of some people following the election. While Mitt Romney supporters are obviously frustrated with their candidate’s loss, others have also grown weary of the bickering and negativity. Social psychology offers several explanations for why typically calm and friendly people have lost their cool during the course of this election.

Effort justification, a phenomenon described by social psychologist Aaron Aronson (2002), is one explanation for both parties’ bad behavior following the election. When individuals invest a significant amount of energy into a cause, they often feel compelled to justify their choice. Energy can come in many forms, ranging from actual campaign participation to paying close attention during the final weeks of the campaign.

Those who supported Romney likely subscribed to his platform’s political values and beliefs. When he lost, Romney supporters experienced a dissonance as their goals seemed lost and their efforts to no avail. In justifying their efforts, Romney supporters might post angry status updates or grumble to friends and family members.

Effort justification also explains the behavior of some Obama supporters, who also feel compelled to justify their effort in this campaign. Mocking posts and negative behavior have been far from reserved for losers in this election. Individuals on both sides have fueled ongoing hostility.

The fact that so many people continue to engage in angry political discourse suggests another social psychology explanation at play, conformity. Online communication indicates a growing trend in loud and frequent announcements of politically driven thoughts. Twitter handled 31 million tweets on election night alone. Many of those were far from friendly or even tactful. Some messages, whether written or spoken, are even aggressive.

A long-standing theory, the frustration-aggression hypothesis, suggests that people react aggressively in response to frustration for what they believe to be an unfair outcome (Dollard et al., 1939). The aggression is intended to equalize that unfairness. After several days of tolerating backlash, Obama supporters share the burden of feeling unfairly scrutinized and a need to get even.

5 Ways to Bust Post-election Blues

Post-election negativity can have significant consequences for one’s mood. It’s also proven detrimental to many relationships. Whether you’ve wiped a few contacts from your Friends list or you aren’t speaking to a coworker, here are 5 ways to calm the dialogue and bust the post-election blues.

Deflect and redirect. Most of us have had plenty of recent opportunities to chat about the election. The fires of negativity can be dampened by taking a break from the hostility. If you hear the topic come up, offer a neutral deflection and change the subject. Try something like, “This campaign has definitely been a busy one and now the holidays are upon us! What are your plans for this weekend?”
Distance yourself from negativity. If you’re burned out on campaign talk, feel free to step out of the breakroom, unsubscribe from updates, and turn off the TV. Put some space between yourself and the hostility.
Ignore, ignore, ignore. This basic but essential suggestion remains important in busting the negativity blues. When someone makes a comment that increases your frustration, verbally or online, ignore it. The origin of the comment, of course, can make this troublesome. It’s one thing if it comes from an acquaintance. If it comes from your spouse, your options to ignore might be limited.
Encourage responsibility. While it’s best to ignore most rants, sometimes it feels impossible. Counter a person’s complaints about injustices with an honest inquiry about how they personally plan to address the problem. If delivered with tact, you’ll be surprised how it stops most in their complaining tracks.
Self-awareness. Be aware of your own forays into the stream of political negativity. Giving and getting hostile interactions often go hand in hand. Recognize your tendency to respond impulsively or post and say hateful things. Increasing your own positive energy is the most direct step to busting the post-election blues.
References

Aronson, E. (2000). Nobody left to hate. New York: Freeman.

Dollard, Miller et al. (1939). The hypothesis suggests that the failure to obtain a desired or expected goal leads to aggressive behavior. Frustration and aggression. Yale University Press: New Haven, CT.

Image credit: Fotolia

Depression? There’s an App for That

Kara Ayers, PhD — Thu, 11 Oct 2012 12:46:49 +0000

Jane McGonigal is a world-renowned game developer. She’s dedicated her career to the creation of intricate imaginary worlds and fiercely promotes the power of play. McGonigal encourages daily gaming. She believes that a quick dose of Angry Birds or hours spent plowing the virtual fields of FarmVille is not only relaxing but is actually beneficial to your health.

So beneficial, in fact, that gaming may add up to 10 years to your life.

In her groundbreaking TED Talk, McGonigal presents the research behind her theory.

Live Longer, Be Happier

Perhaps more interesting than her proposition to live longer is McGonigal’s empathic awareness that some people are uncertain about even living past today. Two years ago, McGonigal experienced persistent suicidal thoughts following a concussion.

As she explains it, her brain started telling her, “You want to die. You are never going to get better. The pain is never going to end.” To heal her brain, McGonigal had been banned from all outside stimulation. She couldn’t play traditional video games, use the computer, leave the house, or even drink caffeine. All of these activities triggered her symptoms.

Even in the depths of her depression, however, McGonigal was still armed with what she knew about research on gaming. Playing games promotes creativity, determination, and optimism. Games encourage people to connect with others, strengthen relationships, and ask for help. These life-giving facets of human existence were the very same characteristics that her injury and suicidal thoughts seemed to be draining. McGonigal decided to cope how she knew best: She designed a game. The game itself was a simple role-playing recovery game titled “Jane: The Concussion Slayer.”

Feeling “SuperBetter” through Gaming

Since its inception and life-saving result, McGonigal has adapted the original recovery game into “SuperBetter.” This free and simple game, which is also an app, focuses on strengthening resilience through simple tasks that increase physical, mental, emotional, and social health. The tasks are easy, fun, and can usually be done in a few minutes. Rather than countering productivity, McGonigal challenges, playing games actually improves our ability to work harder, be happier, and live longer.

Logic leads us to believe that complex and costly problems demand equally complicated solutions. There are fewer problems as complicated and devastating as suicide. As research has demonstrated countless times, human behavior sometimes evades even the greatest attempts at logic. What if it’s true? What if Angry Birds or games like it could have the same healing effect as powerful medication and hours of therapy?

Researchers at East Carolina believe their 2011 study found just that. Among participants who were depressed, individuals who played casual games like Bejeweled Blitz demonstrated an average 57 percent reduction in symptoms. Even more impressive, these improvements remained over time. Researchers concluded that the games “caused physiological and biochemical changes consistent with positive changes in mood and anxiety.”

East Carolina researchers didn’t compare their findings to studies that have found similar relief from depression as a result of board games, outdoor recreation, or time spent with friends. Online games, like Angry Birds, FarmVille, and others, are simply forms of play. In excess, they can be problematic but at the end of many long, busy days, they may be the only form of play some people enjoy. Play — and gaming — has significant, evidence-based healing powers.

As McGonigal concludes, “Reality is broken. We need to make it work more like a game to fix it.”

What do you think?
Are prescriptions for time spent gaming in the future of treatment for depression? How does gaming impact your mood?

For More Information

The Science Behind McGonigal’s TED Talk

Russoniello, C.V., O’Brien, K., & Parks, J.M. (2009). The effectiveness of casual video games in improving mood and decreasing stress. Journal of CyberTherapy and Rehabilitation, 2(1), 53-66.