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There is a lot of emphasis these days on narcissistic and selfish behavior. It’s true that a consistent pattern of putting yourself first ends up eating at your own joy and happiness. But the same is true if you neglect yourself.

I’ve met too many people who “pretend” to be giving and generous out of obligation or a fear of being unloved. As a result, they turn resentful when doling out favors. Instead of helping others out of the goodness of their heart, their empty tank of self-love causes them to ask the question, “What’s in it for me?”

When you are compassionate with others and generous in spirit, do you also offer that same love to yourself? Putting the proverbial oxygen mask on you first is not an act of narcissism or selfishness. It’s a practice in self-care.

How do you counteract being giving to others with giving to yourself? Spend time with people who are compassionate and loving and minimize time with those who are negative and draining. And when you’re having a tough time, be as generous, kind, and understanding to yourself as you would be to those you love. Our top post this week will give you more ideas on how to improve your relationship with yourself and that in return should boost your relationship with everyone else.

{Flickr photo by Quinn Dombrowski}

What Self-Love Looks Like
(Weightless) – Have you been neglecting yourself? Here are a few ways you can cultivate a better relationship with the most important person in your life-you!

The Positive Side Of Pain: Re-defining Your Experience
(Caregivers, Family & Friends) – Is there an upside to painful experiences? You might not think so especially if you’re currently in it. But this post shows us there is light at the end of that dark tunnel.

Weekend Watching: Bradley Cooper On Mental Health and Stigma in America
(Celebrity Psychings) – This just goes to show that you don’t have to personally go through something to be compassionate. Read the ways actor Bradley Cooper is working to raise mental health awareness and minimize stigma in America even if he hasn’t been personally affected by mental illness.

The Boston Bombings and Other Tragedies Bring Out Our Character Strengths
(Character Strengths) – One of the unexpected surprises of tragedy is the outpouring of positive and loving actions in response. Find out what type of strengths are exhibited during traumatic moments.

Stereotyping Mental Illness in the Gun Debate
(Bipolar Beat) – Did President Obama’s recent speech on gun control end up pushing us back in terms of stigmatizing mental illness? This blogger thinks so. Read why here.



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    Last reviewed: By John M. Grohol, Psy.D. on 22 Apr 2013
    Published on All rights reserved.

APA Reference
Uyemura, B. (2013). Best of Our Blogs: April 23, 2013. Psych Central. Retrieved on January 27, 2015, from


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