Perfectionism requires you to buy into the belief that imperfect beings can be, live and achieve perfection. It’s an idealistic philosophy, but one many cultures subscribe to. Why? The idea that we can be perfect feels good on a superficial level and it satisfies an inherent longing on a deeper one.
There is a desire in all of us to love and be loved. And if you received the message as a child that you were not “good enough” because of the way you look, acted, felt or behaved, you may be continuously searching for validation. You may be seeking it through perfectionism.
Research professor, author, and public speaker Brené Brown, Ph.D., LMSW recently sat down with Oprah Winfrey on Super Soul Sunday and said the following about perfectionism:
“Perfectionism is not about striving for excellence or healthy striving…it’s a cognitive-behavioral process, a way of thinking and feeling that says this: ‘If I look perfect, do it perfect, work perfect, and live perfect, I can avoid or minimize, shame, blame and judgment.'”
The alternative to hiding behind your fears is to confront them. What if you’re not quite ready to do that? These posts will help you address and become aware of what’s scaring you from anxiety to failure and everything in between. Read it and it may put perfection in its place.You will find that the path toward happiness doesn’t lie in perfection, but in learning to love and accept yourself and your life, perfectly imperfectly as it is.
10 Things to Tell Yourself When Life Knocks You Down
(Bounce Back) – When you get knocked down, how do you get back up again? Read this to get help, advice and support when life gets hard.
A Quiz to Help You Uncover Your Level of Anxiety
(Therapy That Works) – How do you know if what you’re currently feeling is normal or unhealthy? Take this quiz to discover where you are on the anxiety spectrum and get ideas to help you manage it.
What Does Non-Judgmental Awareness Really Mean?
(Mindfulness & Psychotherapy) – Does non-judgmental awareness mean letting go of judgment when it comes to food, your clients, even your kids? When it comes to mindfulness here’s what non-judgment really means.
The Right Way to do Math Homework (or Chemistry, Physics, Statistics, etc…)
(Always Learning) – Is there a right and wrong way to doing homework? According to this, there is. Find out if your child is practicing good habits or solidifying bad ones here.
5 Signs Your Recovery Is in Jeopardy
(Addiction Recovery) – What makes you susceptible to chronic relapse? Surprisingly, it’s not genetic. Here’s what’s putting you at risk for failure time and time again.
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Last reviewed: By John M. Grohol, Psy.D. on 21 Mar 2013
Published on PsychCentral.com. All rights reserved.
Uyemura, B. (2013). Best of Our Blogs: March 22, 2013. Psych Central. Retrieved on January 26, 2015, from http://psychcentral.com/blog/archives/2013/03/22/best-of-our-blogs-march-22-2013/