We can change our hairstyle, lose weight, work hard to be amazingly successful, but still feel like the awkward, teased kid we were way back when.
A quote from The Office actress Mindy Kaling in the February 2011 issue of O magazine reminded me of that.
“I still think of myself as a chubby 12-year-old, so when my boyfriend says, ‘You’re hot,’ I smile. That’s what people say about Sports Illustrated models, so hearing it makes me feel like I’ve pulled off this total scam.”
I don’t know if Kaling says this modestly or in jest, but I really related to that. Sometimes I still expect to see the same shy, vulnerable 13-year-old in the mirror too. But those harsh words from our peers, parents and ourselves can haunt us through adulthood if we let it. It can take away our accomplishments, our self-esteem and prevent us from growing and moving on our from the past.
Failing to both acknowledge the person we are now and learning to accept and love who we were when we were 30 pounds heavier, wore glasses or had braces, will always pull us back to the past. It can make us feel unworthy, undeserving and sabotage our happiness and negate our successes.
It’s still a challenge for me and sometimes I forget. But every once in awhile when I glance at my reflection, I try to see past my past image. And even if it’s a bit awkward at first, I try to smile both at that 13-year-old girl and the woman who now stands before me.
This week’s top posts are bringing us back to basics helping to define narcissism, sex addiction and preventing suicide awareness. These are weighty posts and always relevant topics. Please share it with someone you know who could benefit.
(Celebrity Psychings) – Suicide Prevention Awareness week in the US and World Suicide Prevention Day have already passed. But let’s continue to spread information and resources on this important topic.
(Sex & Intimacy in the Digital Age) – A lot of people are confused with what sex addiction really is. This post helps to clarify and define this often misunderstood addiction and provides information on what treatment really looks like.
(Therapy Soup) – This riveting post will either be shocking because it’s a true story or surprising because it’s unsurprising. In the latter case, your reaction is due to the fact that you know someone who fits this description of narcissism to a tee.
(Weightless) – Underneath an eating disorder, often lies anxiety. Read how anxiety can undermine eating disorder recovery and how focusing on your values can help.
(Adventures in Positive Psychology) – Admit it. You’re a worrywart. Many of us are. Unfortunately, not only is worrying not productive, excessive worrying can be debilitating. Fortunately, there are things you can do to break the worry cycle and start to take back your life.
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Last reviewed: By John M. Grohol, Psy.D. on 13 Sep 2011
Published on PsychCentral.com. All rights reserved.
Uyemura, B. (2011). Best of Our Blogs: September 13, 2011. Psych Central. Retrieved on March 3, 2015, from http://psychcentral.com/blog/archives/2011/09/13/best-of-our-blogs-september-13-2011/