It’s been three years since I’ve dined in the community room of a psych ward with some fellow depressives… Trying to slice a piece of rubber turkey with a plastic knife while wondering what I had to do to get out of there. I would like very much not to return. I came up with these steps to help me. But they are good sanity tools even if you’ve never made it to the community room.
1. Keep a consistent rhythm.
I’m not talking about rap, or your tempo on the drums. I’m referring to your circadian rhythm, the internal biological clock which governs fluctuation in body temperature and the secretion of several hormones, including the evil one, cortisol.
Here is how you establish good rhythm that assists you with the whole sanity thing: you live a boring life.
Sort of.
You have to go to bed at the same time every night, and wake up at the same time. Preferably with the same person. You can’t befriend Australians, or if you do, you can’t visit them. Because travel, in general, and especially travel to different time zones, will throw off your circadian rhythm. During the fall and winter months, I stare into my HappyLite for an hour a day because, fragile creature that I am, my brain mourns the sunlight that it gets in the spring and summer.
Folks with seasonal affective disorder and bipolar disorder have to be especially careful to prevent disturbances in the circadian rhythm in order to keep their friends and their jobs. And long-term disruption can actually do mega damage, like messing with the peripheral organs outside the brain, and contributing or aggravating cardiovascular disease. Chronic disruption of the circadian rhythm can suppress melatonin production, too, which has been shown to increase the risk of cancer.
2. Don’t be a cooking frog.
Psychologist Elvira Aletta recently reminded me of the lesson of the cooking frog: You put a frog in a pot of boiling water, it jumps out to preserve its life. You put the same frog in cold water, turning up the heat gradually, and he stays in there … acclimating to the temperature. Until, that is, he boils to death.
I can feel the temperature rising in my pot lately, so I’ve just ordered a bunch of ice-cubes–a vacation, vitamin D supplements, extra therapy–to cool things down.
3. Team up.
Think of the buddy system from Boy Scouts. Teaming up with someone means that you have to be accountable. You have to report to someone. Which lowers your percentage of cheating by 60 percent, or something like that. Especially if you’re a people-pleaser like me. You want to be good, and get a badge or checkmark or whatever the hell they’re passing out, so make sure someone is passing out such reviews.
Also, there is power in numbers, which is why the pairing system is used in many different capacities today: in the workplace, to insure quality control and promote better morale; in twelve-step groups to foster support and mentorship; in exercise programs to get your butt outside on a dark, wintry morning when you’d rather enjoy coffee and sweet rolls with your walking partner.
4. Squeeze in some downtime.
There is another kind of rest that is almost as crucial to your mental health as sleep: downtime.
What is that? I don’t have a clue but my sane friends tell me it’s great.
Downtime lives in quadrant II of Stephen Covey’s time-management matrix I talked about in the video I published awhile back. This kind of rest is important but not urgent. So we say “fuhgedaboudit.” But we really shouldn’t “fuhgedaboudit,” because downtime is our cushion against stress. If your body is without a cushion for too long, the pieces tend to fall apart. Like Humpty Dumpty. And, I hate to bear the bad news, but sometimes the doctors can’t put you back together again.
5. Know your triggers.
After twelve years of therapy and 21 years of hanging out in twelve-step groups, I think I have finally located my triggers: Irish bars loaded with inebriated folks, super-sized Wal-marts with over 100 aisles of products manufactured in China, Chuck-E-Cheese restaurants with life-sized rodents singing melodies to screaming children, and conversations with people who think mental illnesses are like mermaids–not real–and that absolutely every health condition can be fixed with the right thoughts plus a little acupuncture.
6. Preserve your willpower.
Managing your emotions is like being on a permanent diet. If you start off eating celery with hummus for lunch every day, your diet will last approximately six days. At least that’s when I threw out the bag of celery and reached for a BLT.
No. You have to pace yourself–throw in a small piece of dark chocolate … or a pound–so that you keep the momentum of eating right.
Science supports my claim here: Humans have a limited amount of will power. It’s like coal. So don’t even try to quit smoking when you’re eating veggies, or abstain from your Pinot Noir if you’re de-cluttering your house.
ONE CHARACTER DEFECT AT A TIME.
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6 Ways to Stay Out of the Psych Ward - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information (6/23/2009)
13 Comments to
“6 Ways to Stay Out of the Psych Ward”
I loved this article. Only one who has been in the frightening place can know the value in working to stay out. I was about to stop reading this sit after an article subtly labeling bipolars as wife abusers but if more productive and helpful articles like this are published, I’ll hang around. Great Job.
I loved this article. Only one who has been in the frightening place can know the value in working to stay out. I was about to stop reading this sit after an article subtly labeling bipolars as wife abusers but if more productive and helpful articles like this are published, I’ll hang around. Great Job.
OH! You’re my new favorite blogger fyi
great article. coming from someone who has experienced the challenge of eating rubbery chicken with a plastic spoon, i appreciate it. sometimes we just need a reminder.
Hi, Therese -
This is a great post — very practical and very do-able! Thanks for sharing!
- Marie (Coming Out of the Trees)
http://mmaaggnnaa.wordpress.com/
Great article…honest and funny. That’s a great read for a Monday.
The thing that keeps me out of the psych ward is my last visit where I finally realized they have NO real answers, only bandaids – expensive bandaids and I can buy bandaids cheaper on the outside here where tylenol doesn’t cost 10.00 per tablet!
Most psych wards just warehouse us to help us get calmed down and “moving again” if we have slowed down to a halt.
And yes, rubber turkey with depressed people and no proper cutlery is not something I reall want to do again!
I love your honesty! x
Nice if you have the money for a vacation and “extra” therapy. Otherwise, poor advice.
I love this!. Its been nearly 2 yrs for me since i was in that community room, and i am quite afraid of ever having to go back there.
Perfect . one character defect at a time [maybe a character defect of the month?]and avoid Australians and life size rodents. These nuggets will stick with me a lot longer than earnest discussions. I just see myself becoming a large rat scurrying about my cluttered house when I don’t manage to make a space for sleep and re-creation.
With my loved ones “taking turns”, I have learned a great deal to make time outs fun. Not all of us have extra money or time to go somewhere. Sometimes, we have to stay around. So, the key is to be happy where you are–right now. Admist sunny days or rainy days, adversity or flourishing days of sucess, we need to keep grounded. These tips have helped me, my husband as well as son stay sane. Thanks to my reading and numerous therapists, I’m able to share some hope..
1) If your world is crumbling, then find your happy place. We’ve all heard that phrase, but finding your happy place, can be right on the couch that you come home to every day. If finances are in trouble or work is extremely hectic or the trip to a super store has put you over the edge, then find your happy place by enjoying the peace of being on the couch. If the couch is what is stressing you out, then sit on the floor. Key is–you always have the ability to find a happy place. If it’s a true “Calgon” moment, then close your eyes and imagine that you are in Jamica, your own private island or camping in Montana..screaming 
2. If you’re in a depressive mood, then the same applys–picturing a happy mood sometimes help. If it doesnt, then write down how you’d like to feel Maybe not Grammy award winning song lyrics, but definately you’ll feel like a winner. Hey, once you feel better, give it a try!
3. If you’re trapped even further in a hole, try to relocate yourself. Move to another part of the house.. if you stay in one place too long–you’ll need to clean the carpet –and with prices these days, don’t add more misery to your already anguished feeling. Keep moving-eventually it will be a new day! Start a new worlds record for something~
4. Know that life will get better–. Call a friend–let them know that you can’t call them because you are too depressed. Maybe they’ll help you call another friend.
These are just a few of the tactics that i’ve used to help myself and to help my loved ones.
Hope that this might help you. I’m not a therapist, but hope that you’ll seek help somewhere if you think you MIGHT need it.
i’ve had to remember that if I’m complianing that the world is terrible, then the best thing to do is not contribute to it. Change starts with me. If I want a more positive world, then I have to be the first to start the chain.
If you want to life to get better, you have to hop on the life train.
All ABOARD!
How to stay out of inpatient treatment?
My 12 step program to feeling good?
1. drink lots of water
2. move your bowels regularly
3. exercise–burn off pent up negativity
4. vitamins–esp. BComplex
5. daily Bible reading
6. review and recall Bible reading
7. forgive-and cease feeling resentment
8. count your blessings–keep positive focus
9. render and recieve marital due
10. use positive self talk
11. pray for Holy Spirit to manifest its fruitage
12. express true feelings to God or in a diary
13. Remember there is more happiness in giving
14. make a daily to-do list and achieve it
15. treat others like we want to be treated
16. get outside
17. associate–dont isolate and withdraw
18. laugh, smile
19. spend 60mins. a day to upbuild yourself enumerating all the good things about yourself
18. find 5 good things God specifically helped you on today and thank him for it.
19. don’t complain
20. don’t run people down & air their dirty laundry
21. let go of anger and find 5 things you like about the person that made you mad
22. spend 60mins a day cleaning your house
23. listen to music
24. eat whole foods close to natural state
25. live in the today, not yesterday’s past
26. forgive yourself often
27. don’t expect perfection of imperfect people and imperfect world–its not realisticly reasonable
28. try to do what Jesus did, look at his life and imitate it and his personality
29. learn to love–yourself and others
30. never give up, keep trying. You will succeed because you fail. failures point to solutions
31. cry
I’ve often thought of spending the night or weekend in the psych ward, just to give control over to someone else. It is nice sometimes to put myself in someone else’s hands and recieve permission not to think the bad thoughts and just rest. Last night was rough and driving home from a bar where I’d spotted my ex (ugghhh, pain, anger, humiliation) I obsessed on suicide and then thought about the hospital. So, when I came home I pretended I was at the hospital and that I was doing what they told me to do (drink herbal tea, get into bed, watch a DVD)…it helped a little.
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Last reviewed: By John M. Grohol, Psy.D. on 19 Jun 2009
