Nope, you got it wrong.

In any true friendship… at least healthy ones, you need to have reciprocity or it is not healthy or true. The context behind these persons included folks who, at some time, declared themselves to be “true friends” but could not deliver on reciprocity. When we reciprocate with our friends, we give value and appreciate them. To not show it, is not friendship and hence a one-side relationship and superficial. It is difficult to include all aspects of a social context when giving examples.

Best regards,

In the article I don’t give many specifics of the social context of my examples. What you don’t know, perhaps, is that those relationships where I disclosed myself were called, by mutual agreement, “close relationships or friendships.” A close relationship with a friend presupposes safety to disclose. If it is healthy, it should be reciprocal, or it is one-sided and not a true friendship. You may call my disclosure as “narcissistic” but then again that is what friends are supposed to do with each other or they are not close friends but rather superficial. I hope that helped to clarify.

My example of the joker is one where joking is used as a conversational device to distract another person from putting yourself in a position where you REALLY have to show who you are. Since narcissists don’t want you to know they are needy and weak inside, this is why they might use ways to change the subject and get the specific questions off themselves. They love to talk about themselves as long as THEY control what they say about themselves. Here is where their grandiosity or self-pity comes out (exaggerated ego).

Best regards,

Perhaps you are right. I appreciate your input.

Perhaps I attracted more narcissists to me because I have been a “narcissist magnet” by having unhealed issues and needs making me a co-dependent. It is interesting that at one time in my life I was surrounded by these types. As I grew healthier, in terms of what good boundaries are, I got reactions from these individuals, and they started to “peel off” but with pain. These days, I hardly know any narcissists that are close to me any longer. That is a good thing.

Thanks again!

Thank you for your kind words. I get a kick how all the humor and very interesting responses of folks to the article. I need all the help I can get…

Feel free to drop me a line via my website on the contact page. The email is info@DrSam.tv
I will try to respond the best I can. I, too, am a learner like you.