“I’ve had a lot of experience with family troubles and disappointments, and interestingly through my mind working out things and dreams I’ve received a lot of peace and comfort”

Terrible.

That would explain all the “eureka” moments where the answer to a problem hits you suddenly when it seems like you’re not even thinking about.

Some people hyperventilate (mildly) without noticing it, and when they go to bed, they’re not really sleeping that well. They can’t remember dreams, etc, and their body fails to heal and fails to properly encode the day’s events into long-term memory. In my case, it seems like bad breathing patterns set up a multi-year anxiety disorder with depression and a host of idiopathic/somatic physical issues that resembled fibromyalgia. Fortunately, that is all going away along with anxiety and depression. I also had to get my vitamin D levels back to normal.

Sleep and breathing are right next to food and water in terms of having a basis for health and happiness. It’s a crime that psychiatrist prescribe extremely powerful drugs instead of checking these simple physiological things first.

1) How much does drug addiction (caffeine/nicotine/amphetamine etc) affect one’s sleep. Should smokers take a nicotine patch at night for instance, to ensure a stable sleep.

2) Should AD/HD types continue to take a night dose of stimulants/atomexetine before they go to sleep or at least something to stabilise their sleep patterns?

Or, does this not matter too much because the rest of the body is not so active during sleep?

Anyway, we struggled along and eventually my parents moved to my town after I had finished up my college degree while raising 4 children.
I had another one after they moved to our state.
I thought it would be great to have my parents living close. In some aspects it was, but my father wasn’t the father of my youth. He was aging and would stay involved with our finances.

Towards the end of his life he helped us when we started a new business. But this brought more controlling behaviors from him. We eventually paid him off for helping us get into a house farther away from him and conducive to our service business which was growing.

We finally paid him back for all monies that he ever loaned to us. But not without his constant criticism of my husband and always wanting to sell the house we were in so that he could make a profit, even though he was making a profit off of us.

He finally left us alone for about a year after my 15 1/2 year old son committed suicide. My mother had had many strokes at that time that she didn’t know who’s funeral she was at.
My mother past away a year after my son’s death from a devastating stroke that paralyzed her throat and affected her frontal lobe.
Then my father showed signs of lymphoma right after her burial. I took care of my father 24/7. Until his house sold and he moved in with my sister out of state. The lymphoma came back and chemo treatment was started again with new doctors. They stopped the treatment as my dad was just too ill.

My family took on the task of cleaning out his home and moving a lot of stuff to second hand stores or a storage unit. I have 6 siblings that all lived out of state. So a lot of it was left to my husband and I.

Anyway, it took a year to realize that the writing me out of the will was done by an angry & confused father, and when it was done 2 months later he had received lump payments
from us a few months after. Thousands of dollars were paid back. But my father must have forgot about it. And in his illness he had told two of my brothers, that he forgave the debt. One brother had Power of Attorney and the other helped out with my dad’s finances before he passed.

While taking care of my father he would ask me about money and I told him we had paid him back. Anyway, before his funeral my brother showed me the will and then said, “Well there is a good thing”. He told me about how my Dad forgave the debt. So that meant to my brother and family that I didn’t owe anything to the estate and I thought that I was going to get some money.

Eight months later I found out that the will had already been dispersed. It was awful…
I couldn’t believe it. I was so shocked.
I consulted with two attorneys and they said that usually when this happens a family could come together and agree that Dad was wrong and share their inheritance, but not my family. I wrote all them a letter about them each owing me some money as I was wrongfully judged. My brother with Power of Attorney assured me that they all care for me and think nothing bad about me because I was written out of the will. I wrote him back and told him I wrote the letter to inform everyone that Dad was wrong and I deserved my inheritance.

My brother got on his high horse and said I’m not going to change Dad’s will when this is what he wanted. He didn’t bother to give me the time of day to look at our records of cancelled checks and we had our own loan for our house.

One of the attorneys told me that there was nothing they could do and that my father’s will should have been looked at years ago.

Okay, sorry this is long, but it still grieves me, but doesn’t hurt as much although it hurts me more the way my siblings are acting. Noone wants to get to the root of problem.

Well, after this happened I would wake up to tears every morning, I would have dreams about my father and the way he was as I was in his home growing up, I would try to figure out why, and wrestled with this heartache every night just about, for a year. Counsel from my Dr. and church leaders would say that my sibling probably have already spent the money, that there isn’t any to give to me.

That’s all well and good, but that doesn’t excuse the lack of understanding nor their desire to check out the details and my side of the story. Only my eldest sister asked me why I brought this up later instead of when I was shown the will.

I explained to her that I was expecting some money as Dad had said to two of my brothers that he had forgave the debt and also my brothers would tell my Dad that he should really tell me before it was too late.

I was with my Dad 24/7, so he had time, but didn’t do it and I feel my brothers should have sat down with him and have this meeting.

I haven’t aggressively pursued anymore “fairness” from my siblings, but it is awkward to be with them. All I can say is that due to my father helping us out with the start of our new business on a shoe string, we have built it to the point that we are recession proof and that in the past year we have been supporting a third brother and his family while he struggles through the ravishes of leukemia he contracted a year ago December.

We moved him from his home state to ours, provided a house without rent, took care of other financial needs and gave emotional support.

While some gambled away their inheritance, some put their money in a stock plan and that tanked and some have lost jobs.
One thing I can say about my brother that has Power of Attorney, is his wife was on her last bout with breast cancer and died shortly after the inheritance was dispersed. So my brother had to deal with a very sick wife and had to fly to visit my Dad, and the same was happening to my older brother.

The stock he had previously also tanked and he had built this luxurious house on 14 acres with 2 built in swimming pools and other ammenities. But this caused trouble in his second marriage and he couldn’t afford the house any longer and had to sell it at a very low price.

So I’ve had many dreams that help me cope with my feelings, frustrations, pain and sorrow, and in making wise decisions, etc.