Videojug is an educational social video site known for its huge array of step-by-step instructional videos on everything from how to tie a tie or how to get rid of spam email, to how to play table tennis/ping pong.

Being a Good Friend is a collection of 17 short videos on specific social situations: How to get along with your girlfriend/boyfriend’s friends, being “just friends” with someone (as opposed to a romance), what to do when your friend gets engaged, pregnant, or divorced, how to tell a friend their partner is cheating, being a good “wingman”, how to recognize a truly good friend, some quizzes, and instructions on how to give a man-to-man “man-hug” with totally hilarious what-not-to-do depictions.

More sombre: how to help a friend who loses a parent, has alcohol addiction, or loses a job. The latter video has excellent professional advice from the University of London’s Careers Group. Here’s an outline of the steps in What to Do When Your Friend Loses a Job:

Step 1 - Just listen, don’t try to fix things.
Step 2 - Slow down. Though they may need a new job ASAP, unemployment is an opportunity to reassess a career, so encourage it.
Step 3 - Affirm their identity outside of work, their talents and qualities.
Step 4 - What do they want? Friend will give cues about what they need from you.
Step 5 - They may ask questions like, “What’s the name of that company?” Give direct and clear information.
Step 6 - How questions. If they ask you how to dress for an interview, etc., they’re asking for your wisdom or advice. Offer opinions but not framed as statements of fact.
Step 7 - If they ask, “Why did this happen?” They may want to have an existential conversation, respond with “philosophy, religion or beer.”
Step 8 - Help in marketing themselves. A scenario is that they have 15 seconds to pitch themselves to a vice-president who can hire them in their dream job. What will they say? This is known as the “elevator pitch”, which helps to self-define.
Step 9 - Practice mock interviews, but don’t dent confidence with too much criticism.
Step 10 - Recommend a recruiter.
Step 11 - If you’re a co-worker left behind, they may have mixed feelings toward you, so be non-aggressive in approaching.

Though of course there are no one-size-fits-all answers to complex problems, this collection of videos offers some practical, basic advice to handle social situations.

I’m reminded of a favourite quote from Ralph Waldo Emerson: “The only way to have a friend is to be one.”

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This entry was posted on Tuesday, June 24th, 2008 at 7:27 pm and is filed under General, Relationships, Psychology, Alcoholism, Grief & Loss, Men's Issues. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

 

Last reviewed:
  On June 24, 2008
  By John M. Grohol, Psy.D.